Birthday party drop off question

DD was invited to a 4th birthday party for one of the little girls in her class.  The party is at the little girl's house.  Invite says to drop off at 1 and pick up at 3.  I have never met the parents and don't know much about the little girl or her family.  Do you think it would be ok if I asked the mom if I could stay for a little bit to make sure that DD adjusts ok?  In reality, I know DD would be ok, but it is me who is a little nervous.  Or am I just being a crazy mom?

DD~6 years old~born June 6, 2008 (1st grade)
DS~4 years old~born November 6, 2010 (1st year of preschool)

Re: Birthday party drop off question

  • I would never ever just leave my child at a party where I don't know the parents, other parents and whether or not creepy stepdad with a history of touching little girls will be there. heck no! Either you go to the party or don't let her go.
    Baby Birthday Ticker TickerBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • At age 4, I would never leave my child at a party alone regardless of where the party is.  Honestly, last winter my older DD (4 1/2 at the time) went to a friends party that was at their house - I saw the parents almost daily at pick-up and drop off and they are both teachers but I still stayed as my DD wanted me to.  At another house party last year, every parent stayed (they had set up the family room with some snacks so the parents were out of the way but still there if needed.  Funny thing - I just posted on Parenting on how to word "Parents please plan to stay" for my DD's 4th party at a bounce house place.  It never crossed my mind that parents would leave a 4 year old at a party until last summer when I saw it and again, this fall at one my DD's classmates party (the poor boy whose parents left had a potty accident and no one had any extra clothes or anything)
    Jenni Mom to DD#1 - 6-16-06 DD#2 - 3-13-08 
  • All of the parents stay at all of the 4/5 year old parties we have been invited.
    My darling daughter just turned 4 years old.
  • I have never dropped DD off to anyone but family (specifically my mother, MIL and SIL), and I can't imagine just dropping her off at a party.  Of course, I think the parents are crazy for wanting a bunch of 4 year olds in their home without at least 1 parent for each child.  I would ask about staying until your D is comfortable and then just play it by ear.  In my case, DD takes a little while to feel comfortable in new places, so she is often clingy for the first part of a birthday party, so I would have a good excuse.
    Jordan Alaina is here!

    TTC #2
    BFP #1 7/3/11, blighted ovum diagnosed 8/3/11, D&C 8/4/11 at 8 wks, 3 days;

    BFP #2 10/4/11


  • I would ask to stay or I wouldn't go.  I find it odd a invitation would say to drop off a 4 yo.  I would never think of asking parents to do that.  That type of responsibility sounds unnerving.  
    Mom to Harmon 1/17/08 and twins Rachel & Callum 8/28/09 Photobucket 29o0v13.jpg
  • No way would I do this!  Any party that DD or DS has been invited to either DH or I would stay. 

    I guess it would be different if you knew the family, but since you don't know them, I wouldn't do it.

  • 20 bucks says they have an older child and just don't realize that their younger child is still at the age of parties where parents stay.

    My kids' friends who have older siblings also have parents who disappear during birthday parties while the rest of us stay.

    I'm in the "call and ask to stay" camp.  I wouldn't drop my kid off with someone I've never met before, period.  I don't think you're being crazy at all.


    Our IF journey: 1 m/c, 1 IVF with only 3 eggs retrieved yielding Dylan and a lost twin, 1 shocker unmedicated BFP resulting in Jace, 3 more unmedicated pregnancies ending in more losses.
    Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
  • My DD had her 4 year old birthday party at the zoo last fall with her classmates. Some parents stayed and some parents dropped off. It worked out great for us!

    I would drop her off at a classmate's or close friends house. I see these parents everyday at pick-up and drop-off and we often chat for quite a while. One of the reasons I send her to a faith-based school is so she can interact with parents and kids with the same values.

    Momma to 2 sweet girls here on earth and a precious baby boy in heaven
  • For the parties we attend some drop off and some stay.  Usually if they have an older sibling it's a drop off.  I usually stay and chat with other parents.
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