2nd Trimester

"You don't even look pregnant!" vent

I have gained exactly one pound, despite my best efforts to eat around the clock. So yeah, I don't "look" pregnant. But I'm only 15 weeks!

If one more person says, "Are you really in your second trimester?" or "Don't you just hate the fact she's pregnant and looks like that?" or "Sorry, I just don't believe you're pregnant." - I might lose my cool and say something awful.

Like, "Next time I'll be sure to bring in photographic evidence that conception took place."

I know a lot of pregnant people out there are concerned that they're gaining too much, but don't people realize that some of us are self conscious about the fact we haven't gained any?

For those of you farther along who don't "look pregnant" - what do you say?

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Re: "You don't even look pregnant!" vent

  • They probably mean it as a compliment...I wouldn't get too upset.
  • That happened to me from weeks 12-14...but I've "popped" since then and now have a belly, which other people think is cute...if they know me.  Strangers just think I'm fat.
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  • You will have a baby belly eventually.  With my first I didn't show till 20+weeks.  This time I haven't gained any weight yet and just started to really show this week.  
    AP, BWing, BFing, CDing, VBAC, Crunchy Mama to my handsome little 2 year old and squishy newbie! Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickersLilypie First Birthday tickers Babywearing Leader to the DuPage Slingers www.DuPageSlingers.Blogspot.com
  • I think sometimes they can't win...I'm not sure I like it when people say things like, "wow, you're looking huge.." And before I popped at 18 weeks, people would say things like, "you're so tiny." etc...
  • You will have your "jump" soon and start looking pregnant soon.

    I had only gained 5 lbs at 18 weeks and did not look "pregnant" except for a bloated pouch. Week 20 hit and pow... I popped. At my 22 week appointment I had gained 7 lbs. So, that puts me at 12 lbs total which is in the normal range for 22 weeks. People still constantly tell me that I look super small and do not look as pregnant as I am. I think that's a good thing... I'd rather be carrying small then be the size of a whale.


  • I'm also 15 weeks and don't yet look pregnant.  However the only comment I've recevied are along the lines of "wow, you can't even tell!"  Lots of people tell me I look great which I'll happily believe whether or not they mean it.

    But if someoen were to say to me that they didn't believe I was pregnant I would think that I'm just hormonal enough to be really upset! 

    So I can't help you there.  Well, other than to say that I've been pretty good about ignoring most of the sillly comments people make to me.  I really stopped caring what people say and think somewhere along the way.  I don't know if it is pregnancy hormones, age (I'm 37), or what.  But something switched in me when I found out I was pregnant and the baby became the most important thing in the world to me and people who couldn't be supportive simply stopped mattering.  And comments made by people who don't matter to you are pretty unlikely to affect you.  Maybe try that?

  • with my first i didn't show until after 6 months, and even then you could barely tell. even with this one i finally have a pregnant belly at 23-24weeks...until then i went from normal, to chunky phase and i hated it. so far i've only had 1 person ask me when i was due (when among new people) but i don't really let it bother me i guess i don't think it's a big deal. every body is different. i have a super long torso which i attribute the small bump/belly to.
    Lilypie - (xMlo)

    Lilypie - (sZyp)

    Lilypie - (9utJ)








     








  • We were at the hospital yesterday for an appt for DH and the nurse asked if we had any kids and we told her we were expecting ... and she thought we meant we were adopting. She said she never would have known.
  • I barely look pregnant now- all depends on how I stand and what kind of shirt I wear.  It is a compliment and dont worry you will look pregnant soon enough.

     My response when I was 15 weeks to you don't look pg at all "thanks!"

  • I have gained almost 30 lbs, I started at 110lbs and 5'7", so I'm not huge by any means, but I have a definite bump!  I'm 24 wks and any way you slice it I look pregnant.  Apparently not according to a coworker.  She told me today that I don't even look pregnant, just as I was feeling my pregnant worst!  I got really upset about it (very quietly to myself) because when you're feeling like crap and very definitely pregnant, the last thing you want to hear is that you don't look it.  Soooo frustrating!

    Married DH 7/30/11

    CSC arrived 5/7/12 

    CHC arrived 5/2/14

  • I really didn't start showing until about 21-22 weeks.  I have still only gained about 8lbs.  I did start a little heavier so for me its okay if I don't gain too much right now!  You are still early, keep enjoying your regular pants and shirts!  Big Smile

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  • I'm in the same boat.. 14 weeks and not a thing to show for it!

    Most of the comments I'd probably just laugh off. But to the "Sorry, I just don't believe you're pregnant" comment.. Well, then we've got a hell of an issue with these ultrasounds, because I'm seeing something completely different.

    Mr & Mrs H. - It all began 10.21.09
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  • Don't let it upset you. I'm still hearing it too. I just giggle it off and say "thanks" and think of how  am happy I can still fit into my regular jeans and clothes. I normally answer back with " my mom didn't show with me until she was about 6 months with me, so I guess I'm taking after her."

    I hear it all the time from my MIL and SIL how I'm the most boring pregnant person because I'm not showing and don't have any weird cravings....oh well. 

  • image cpete5:

     

    I know a lot of pregnant people out there are concerned that they're gaining too much, but don't people realize that some of us are self conscious about the fact we haven't gained any?

    For those of you farther along who don't "look pregnant" - what do you say?

    I posted about this today on the june 2012 board. I was positive I would be showing my now...NOPE. I never thought I would be so upset with not gaining weight.

    Audrey is going to be a big sister!

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  • I didn't start showing until 18 or 19 weeks. Don't worry about it and don't be too sensitive about it...you will start showing soon enough and then you will get the opposite reaction and comments.  It's all part of pregnancy, people's comments are always around and no one usually means it negatively, they are just trying to compliment/acknowledge the pregnancy.

  • You are only 15 weeks along, I would not worry!!  I didn't gain a pound until 16 weeks pretty much, then it all came! I'm 21 weeks tomorrow and I get people STILL telling me "I don't even look pregnant" which is actually a compliment! I do have a little bump, it's easily hideable (even when I don't try).  If it helps any, I did go through a growth spurt around 18 weeks.... 

    And think about it, I'd rather not look pregnant, then look like I'm due any day now early on and be uncomfortable. It's actually a good thing. But like you, I agree it kind of sucks not to show. I just say, "yep, not sure when i'm really gonna pop, but baby is healthy!" and really baby's health is what matters

  • I'm 23 weeks & have only gained between 6 & 10 pounds as of my last appointment. I am definitely showing but I had a bit of a belly on me before I got pregnant, thanks to the 20 pounds I had gained over the past 2 years. DH thinks I won't gain much more, even though I still have about 15 pounds left to gain to hit the 'recommended amount'. I had a coworker make a comment last week, "So, you're not having twins?" I really wanted to hit her! :) I was really concerned about not gaining enough & my doc said to just make sure I get enough protein (I'm vegetarian). Don't worry you'll gain it.
  • Take it as a compliment :o)
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  • I've been getting similar comments this pregnancy, even at 21 weeks.  I take it as a compliment and say thank you :)

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  • Chill out - they mean it as a compliment. There are more important things to get upset over. I never understand when pregnant women get so bent out of shape about people's comments. Ignore and move on!
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  • I'm sorry. I know it's annoying, but it's probably best to just brush it off with a laugh. I think people never really know what to say to pregnant women, lol. Hey, at least you're not getting the "You don't even look pregnant" when you've gained like 30lbs. It's like, "Oh, so I just look fat? Awesome. Thanks." <----that was me during both previous pregnancies, not that I actually ever said that out loud. Now with this one when someone tells me I look pregnant already I get positively giddy.

    eta: lol, I just realized that you're just 15 weeks. People aren't saying that because you haven't gained weight, it's because they truly believe that your stomach pops out 2 seconds after you get the bfp and are surprised that you can be pretty pregnant and not have a basketball tummy. My SIL was disappointed that I didn't "look pregnant" at like 10 weeks! It's totally normal to not really show until 20+ weeks, weight gain has very little to do with it. 

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  • I just had someone tell me this yesterday - I am still barely showing and can easily hide my bump. I definitely take it as a compliment! People just want to say something when they know you're pregnant, I don't think anyone is trying to be offensive. I am reconsidering my time in the gym, as apparently I look about the same after not doing any ab work for 7 months as I did when I worked out every day, but other than that I'm just happy to still be comfortable and moving around! Enjoy it while you can!

    Due 3.27.14 (lame because I cannot figure out how to save a fun ticker.....)
  • Oh man, that sucks.

    Sucks as much as going to work and saying how your pants are too tight now, but its still exciting because your starting to feel the baby kick!!!
    And the response I get is:
    "You shouldnt be getting that big yet, and theres No Way you feel baby kicking already!!"

    O.o

    What?!! Fine. Dont believe me.

    People suck.

    ~?~ Chellezy ~?~ Daisypath Anniversary tickers PitaPata Cat tickers
  • Really annoying when people make those comments thinking they know it all, even if they have been through a pregnancy before. We're all different. At 19 weeks, I've lost 4 pounds and still look exactly the same as I did before I became pregnant. I think the people I work with find it hard to believe that I am almost 5 months along and don't show at all. Honestly, I don't care. I know my baby boy is in there doing great and I will proudly display my ultrasound pics today. Maybe then, they will be a bit more silent.

  • LOL! I put up the exact same post about a week ago in the July board and got the same sort of responses.  I will tell you since then I have popped and my stomach instead of a fat blob now has some round definition and you can tell that I didnt just eat too many donuts this morning!

    Just give it time, its so enjoyable now going around to all my coworkers that said that and saying "HEY LOOK now" :) Your time will come and you will see, for now just brush it off, I always did the awkward laugh when they said that.... lol

    The time is now to be fun and fancy free, lookout world he's headed towards 3!
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    Dating: 7.1.2008        Engaged: 11.25.11       Austin: 07.21.12     Wedding: 5.4.2013

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  • I'm a little over 28 weeks and people didn't start noticing I was pregnant until about a month ago. Now people won't shut up about it. There are 3 questions they all ask... When are you due? Do you know if it's a boy or girl?, and Is this your first? Trust me when I say you will probably get tired of it. Don't stress though. Your belly is coming! Just be thankful you don't have to be uncomfortable for that much longer.

     image

    CeliaS
  • It really doesn't bother me.  I'm at 19 weeks and hear the same comments all the time.  I figure it could be worse-  someone asked my SIL when she was due...and she wasn't pregnant.  

     

    image, image,
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  • I think that people are trying to compliment you. 

    At the end of the pregancy they'll be saying things like, "Are you sure you're not having twins?" or "You look ready to pop".  So enjoy this while it lasts!

    image
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  • Take it as a compliment!  And simply say everyone's different!  If you're tall, then you will take longer to show.  I didn't start to show (enough for others to tell) until around 19 weeks.  I'm 5'7".  I had only gained 1 pound by week 15 as well (I was very nauseous from week 6-12) and slowly gained it until about 20 weeks, then it seemed like from then till now (24.5 weeks), I've hit growth spurts (up to 13 gained now).    
  • this is one of the main reasons i haven't told very many people other than a few close friends....i don't have the patience for ignorant comments or listen to comments like...oh it will only get worst...blah blah blah...i want say no ***....here's your sign, thank you cpt obvious.  aww...i feel better :)
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