Parenting

Advice regarding behavior issues

Try to make a long story short...My 2 yr old son has been very attached to his dad for the past 6 weeks.  To the point that I can't do anything and I certainly can't do anything right.  I can't pour him milk, take him out of his car seat, put on his pjs, give him a bath, read him a book.....nothing.  Everything is "Daddy do it" and if I push, he throws a complete fit.  He says that he loves his daddy all the time, and sometimes he will say he loves his mommy & his daddy too.  There have been times that he flat out says he doesn't like his mommy. 

Of note, we did have to change his daycare (also about 6 weeks ago) because our daycare center closed.  So he's at a new center now and JUST now comfortable that he's not crying too much. 

So I know that kids go through stages where they are attached to one parent or the other and it often switches back and forth, but this has been for a really long time and sometimes he's just plain mean to me.  My husband thinks I need to just sort of force myself on him and even though he hates it, he'll get used to it.  I feel like that will make it worse.  So I've just been letting Daddy do everything (sounds nice, I know, but I'd prefer to have it the other way) and hope it will pass.

Thanks

Re: Advice regarding behavior issues

  • Evan was like that for a while, when he realized he had a "choice" in who helped him get ready for bed, got him milk etc.  I bet you are the one who has done most of that stuff from the beginning.  I know it hurts but just keep letting your husband do the thing your DS wants (if he is available of course) eventually he will turn around and want you to do some things for him too :)

    Cheryl, Evan 4.25.05, Paige 7.2.07
  • I wouldn't force yourself on him.  If daddy can't do it, then your 2 y/o has a choice.  Let mommy pour him milk or cry about it.  Eventually he will let you pour his milk.  If he is mean to you, then tell him he's making you sad.  Make a frown face and show him how he's hurting you.  When he is nice to you, tell him how happy it makes you and praise him for that behavior. 

    I think he's just trying to push buttons and see what he can get away with.  It's ok to have a preference, but you have to show him where the boundaries are.  It's not ok to be mean to you, though.

  • I don't know, I think letting Daddy do it all is hurting, not helping. When DD does this, usually its with my DH and I'll just go ahead once or twice and do things myself but when it becomes a habit, I make sure he gets in there, gets some more alone time with her and "re-connects".

    Good Luck, I'm sorry, I know this must bother you.

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  • We are going through this right now too with DD but it is towards DH when she says no Mommy do it I tell her no that Daddy needs to help her Mommy is busy it takes a few times of repeating it & then usually she will let DH help.  It is just a faze & DD & your DS will get over it soon enough.  I know it hurts you as it does my DH but don't let it get you down you know he still loves you too.
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  • Who drops him at daycare?  If it is always you...have Daddy do it a few times.  Who picks him up?  If it is Daddy...you do it a few days.  I think it is a stage.  My only concern is that he actually says he doesn't like you.  Where would he hear that?
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