Babies: 3 - 6 Months

getting out without ebf baby?

Our baby will be 4 months old in a few days and up until this point I have not wanted to leave him with anyone else.  My husband and I live far away from family, so we do not have the luxury of leaving him with family members in order to go out for a date night or with friends.  I'm starting to feel secluded from friends and wonder if always having my baby in-tow makes them uncomfortable and not want to invite us to do stuff.  Also, my baby is exclusively breast fed and will not take a bottle.  My husband and I have tried giving him my pumped milk through a bottle a couple of times, but our baby cries and refuses it so I end up nursing him.  I love nursing him and do not want to stop, but I'm afraid this makes it impossible for me to leave him with anyone else.  :o/  Any advice??

Re: getting out without ebf baby?

  • no advice here! just wanted to tell you you're not alone. i even live close to family but still can't really leave LO with them because i'm ebf and he won't take a bottle. my lo is 5months now though so we're on some solids. i guess i see a small glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel.

    i also love nursing and plan to do it as long as i can. but i feel you on feeling a little isolated. i feel bad sometimes because there are times when i need a little 'space' from DS. it just seems like i never get a half hour to myself. DH works a lot of long hours and so it's me and DS most of the time.

    i like when we have visitors or when we get out. and i have to say that DS starting solids and getting a tooth yesterday makes me feel like i need to hold on to these times very hard, he's growing up so fast. it won't be long before he's going with the grandparents or wanting to hang out with daddy and won't need mommy so much.

    also wanted to add...if your friends feel uncomfortable around your baby...maybe they aren't such good friends! find some with babies!!! good luck mama!

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  • Have you tried having your husband feed LO with a bottle while you are either not home or in another room in the house far away from baby?  I know sometimes LO's won't take bottles if they can smell your milk nearby.

    I know that for me, LO wouldn' take formula from me when I was beginning to wean. 

    Another suggestion is to try another kind of bottle.  I found that my LO preferred the playtex silicone nipples over the Avent bottles nipples.

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  • one more thing...I also found that if LO heard my voice he would stop taking a bottle so I had to stay away.  After a few bottles he got better.

     

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  • thank you both, so much, for the replies!  It's nice to know I'm not alone.  :o)  We will continue to work on the bottle-feeding, but I think I needed the reminder that this time will go by faster than I'd like so I better soak it all up while I can!

    Thank you.  :o) 

  • I'm in the same boat as the rest of you! DS stopped taking a bottle at 8 weeks so I have to be where he is every 3 hours. :) DH and I have gone on two dates since DS was born and my in-laws watched him for us. Both times were a really rushed dinner but it was nice to get out! I totally agree though, that I need to remember to enjoy this time because he's growing up way too fast!
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  • You aren't alone - it took us a few weeks of persistence (and my being out of the house) for LO to take bottles.  We'd done one here or there starting around 6 weeks but LO started to refuse just as we were approaching daycare.  We also had to experiment with bottles/nipples and needed to stick with slow flow (medium was too fast) and had to warm them up as she won't take cold milk.  It helped to have DH give them when she just wakes up from nap and is sleepy and thus a little more willing .  My lactation consultant also said sippy cups can be a good last resort.

  • You're definitely not alone.  I started to give LO a bottle around 4-5 wks to get him used to the idea of taking it from Daycare.  He's now 5 mos and has only been with us, daycare and my mom (for just a couple hours).  I love nursing and find it to be my guilty pleasure. I'm selfish about it and I'm not ashamed to say it.  I love the bonding and time together.

    Try to have DH give LO a bottle when he's not starving and when you're out of the house - even if you run to the center of town or to the post office.  Sometimes they won't take a bottle if they know you're nearby.  (Why take a bottle when they KNOW they can have the real thing?)  This will help greatly for when you really do have to be away from LO and can't be there to nurse.

     

    GL.

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  • Just get out between feedings. I know it is short but if you miss nursing sessions your supply can dip too. But I would keep trying the bottle just for a once in awhile getaway.
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  • I'm going through the same thing right now. We don't have any family nearby, not that it would matter because C has never taken a bottle. I actually don't mind it. Husband and I get alone time once she goes down for the night at 8:00 (she sleeps until at least 6:00am). I get some me time every day. It might just be a bubble bath or curling up in bed to read a book, but I make sure it happens daily. Husband watches the baby for an hour or two every Saturday so I can get out by myself for a quick outing. It's usually a haircut, manicure, pedicure, meeting friends for coffee, or some shopping. I would also recommend looking into playgroups or other things you can do with other moms. C and I go to playgroup once a week and do a stroller bootcamp 3 day a week at the gym. 

    Making time for yourself is doable, and necessary, you just need to plan ahead.  C is closing in on 4 months old and eats every 1 3/4 to 2 hours so she's practically my shadow, but I make time for myself every day, and feel that I'm a better mom because I take that time. Balance is key. 

    I'll love you forever. I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be.

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  • We also had better luck with Playtex bottles after a bottle strike that lasted a month. Trying the bottle when she was sleepy helped. 
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  • We had the same problem and discovered that our little one is very particular about nipples! His favorite is mam brand, but he will also take nuk orthopedic. He hates traditional round nipple and likes a flattened nipple. 

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