Babies on the brain, but fat on the waist :(
rakel
member
I would actually love to TTC right now,. My husband and I have been married for what will be 4 years in March. Life is going pretty good, we've accomplished or are very close to accomplishing all of the goals we set for the first five years...except I am obese, like, morbidly obese. I have tried for years to lose the weight to the point were it has become a bit of an obsession. I have lost faith in my success... It's very frustrating but I am trying to look positive for 2012. If I could lose at least 50lbs, then I would feel better about TTC. To get pregnant this year would seriously make my decade.
The baby fever has fully spread... I see babies everywhere and... Well, I know I am only 26 and there are still child rearing days ahead but I feel a huge brick wall in front of me. I don't want to wait much longer because I would like to have between 2 and 4 kids, and not all in a row.
I'm trying so hard not to feel sorry for myself and to channel some positive energy...and get serious about losing weight.
Re: Babies on the brain, but fat on the waist :(
If you don't do that, I would seriously consider joining a gym and getting a personal trainer. It will be a few hundred dollars a month, but you'll spend that money on a baby. Why not spend it on you to get you healthy? If you work out with a PT twice a week, you can work up to going 5 times a week. You don't need a PT session everyday, but knowing that the front desk staff and the other trainers will be looking for you may keep you going.
2012 is going to pass like every other year. Do you want to celebrate next year knowing that you lost 50 or 60 lbs and are actively TTC, or do you want to celebrate it by being 3 or 5 lbs heavier than you already are? GL.
I understand your struggles and struggle with the same issue. I go to all preventative doctors appointments and get lab work done yearly to watch my health. My blood pressure is great and OB/GYN has given the green light for TTC.
To be honest my weight has been a constant struggle my whole life. I live life to th fullest and try to be as healthy as I can at this weight. I am also aware that due to my weight I could have pregnancy complications; I could have pregnancy complications that have nothing to do with my weight as well.
I understand. Having children can be a powerful motivator.
Before having my son last year,I lost 46lbs. (within 6 months). You can do it. I've been struggling to lose 24lbs to get back to prepregnancy weight and am now doing weightwatchers.
Once there, I would like to lose 50 more in the next year and a half before we TTC again.
ITS VERY HARD, but this could be your year. Finding others with your similar struggles as well as motivators could be very beneficial. I'm pretty sure a lot of people here would sympathize with you.
You may want to check out www.skinnyemmie.com as well. She is extrememly motivational being open and honest about her weightloss. Her story is inspiring and her struggle is all of us.
Good luck to you.
I know the feeling. I worked hard to lose some weight before we starting ttc eons ago. I lost a good 40 pounds or so, but was still morbidly obese, and I let the bad habits sneak back in (started making poorer eating choices and working out less) as I got more consumed with ttc. Then I got pregnant, then miscarried, then pregnant, then medically terminated (ectopic), then pregnant but premature birth, and then depressed and ttc for 2 years with spates of half-hearted efforts to lose weight.
I am pregnant now, ~22 weeks and morbidly obese. None of my prior issues in pregnancy were related to weight, and my current high-risk status is due to my history, a cerclage and a lot of restrictions that are about a step and a half away from bedrest. I always had good blood pressure before pregnancy, but it's something they are watching like hawks now because I'm at a much higher risk for PIH/pre-eclampsia, which has to be medically maintained because I am not allowed to exercise (I'm barely allowed to walk for the record). My diet isn't something I can control much, between morning sickness and appetite, and the weight issue is a lot harder than I expected it to be. I was nearly 350 lbs when I got pregnant, I lost 25 pounds and only started regaining in the past month or so (and I am back down 5 lbs after a week of illness and no appetite). I never thought it would be so hard to watch the scale go up. My glucose was tested early, and I'd previously done the glucose tolerance test to see if I was pre-diabetic (I was not), and had my numbers not been good, I would have had to do the first GD test before 20 weeks. As it is, I do it at my next appt, a month before most of my peers - I'm at increased risk for GD because of my weight and one of the medications I'm on to prevent pre-term labor. GD carries a higher risk of PIH/pre-e as well.
I know this pregnancy would be easier if I weighed less. Unquestionably. The mental aspect is hard - while my current doctors are wonderful about my weight, accepting that it is what it is and talking about healthy habits and simply moving on, other doctors and nurses I've seen have been horrible. I've been chastized, shamed, and made to feel awful - one OB even talked about going on a diet while I was pregnant because I am so fat. And it's hard to find maternity clothes - the few stores that carry my size are often not correctly proportioned in the chest or arms, even if they fit the belly (I do have a belly though). It's hard to find maternity underwear and nursing bras, and I can't find a maternity support belt in my size that gets decent reviews.
The other thing I've realized is just how much I took for granted being able to do small things. I had a hard time working out for 20 minutes and didn't want to do it. Since I've been so restricted - I get winded walking up a flight of stairs. I can't stand for an hour without feeling faint. It's very frustrating to see these simple things I took for granted and realize that if I'd been honest with myself, I could have pushed my limits to get more fit and active and have been in better shape. It's going to be a long road after this kiddo is born to regain any level of fitness, let alone really start to lose weight. But I'm far more motivated than I've ever been, because this enforced inactivity is really sort of awful.
I know when I had baby fever and ttc was still a ways off, back when I lost weight, it really was motivating to me to picture the healthy pregnancy I was going to have, and to think the changes I was making would give me that healthy pregnancy. It made me feel like I was channeling myself into action when I wasn't quite ready to ttc yet and frustrated. Do talk to your doctor, and weigh everything up (no pun intended) and see what you can do. Another bonus - losing even 10% of your body weight can really increase your fertility, and may make it easier to conceive when you try.
Gabriel Ross - August 24, 2009 * Vivienne Rose - May 1, 2012
My Blog
I was "extremely obese" according to the BMI scale and I tried for a 6-7 months to get pregnant and nothing happened. Then I decided that I wanted to loose weight anyway, so I did a medical weight loss program. I did the optifast program through my insurance. It required a lot: A EKG, blood work at the onset, then blood work every 2 weeks, and monthly doctor visits, along with weekly weigh-ins and support meetings. I loved it. I really did. It was simple, but not easy. I lost 50# in 4 months. Then I got pregnant right before I was about to the program a second time in a row, but it was very effective for me.
I wish I had done it earlier in the pregnancy, but I'm meeting with a nutritionist b/c I've gained too much weight. This was at my own request. I'm hoping that they can help me post-baby too, to loose the weight post baby.
Anyway, I guess I'm saying is that TTC can be a powerful motivator and do what works for you. Explore new weight loss options too. It may pay off!
I used to be "Chasingthedog" but it would never let me update my profile.
The Sheepdog | My sorry looking chart
I will also add that for me, diet is only a very small part of weight loss. A healthy, varied diet is important to all sorts of health issues, but I never lost more than 10 pounds with diet alone. I lost weight with not great diet/caloric reduction and with regular moderate exercise. I lost the most weight and felt best when the two were combined - when I was working out for 45 minutes - 1 hour 5-6 days a week, I felt amazing (I worked up to that slowly, starting with 20 min, 3x a week, sometimes needing a break to catch my breath), and I ate better and felt great and the weight just came off. It was actually, for a couple of months there, secondary to how good I was feeling and the focus was less on weight and more on what I was achieving in my workouts. I could push a little longer or a little harder or increase the speed and that was awesome.
I know when I'm focused on weight loss, it never feels as good. It's slow, it's agonizing, and it can fluctuate so much because of so many things. But focusing on other things, like increasing my work out by five minutes each week, that felt emotionally rewarding.
Gabriel Ross - August 24, 2009 * Vivienne Rose - May 1, 2012
My Blog
I'm so sorry that this is such a nightmare for you! I'll admit, I've never been obese, so I can't relate to that, but I have been overweight and a yo-yo dieter, and I can share what's finally working for me. (Sorry this will be so long!)
First, I completely redid my diet. I quit eating out, and I cut out sugary foods/drinks. The only foods I buy are as whole/unprocessed/organic as possible, and only from the produce, meat, and dairy sections of the grocery store, with the exception of oatmeal and spices/seasonings. (I managed to slash my grocery bill in half by shopping this way, too--winning!)
Second, I started finding out what sorts of cardio activities I liked to do. I just started trying things: walking, running, swimming, etc, til I found one I liked--Zumba--and stuck with it.
Third, after jump-starting my body with the dietary/cardio changes for about a couple of weeks, I went on to body-weight strength training, like pushups, squats, lunges, etc. I did talk to a personal trainer beforehand, and was given a plethora of strengthening exercises and plenty of modifications that I could do at home, all using my body as resistance so that I didn't need any equipment. I was also given a reasonable exercise plan to start on.
That all started 7 months ago, and I've slowly, yet steadily lost about 30 lbs or so. It came off fast at first--I think I lost like 10 lbs the first month--and it's slowed down the closer I get to my goal.
I know my situation is different from yours, and I'm no expert, this is just what worked for me; it's a good idea to talk to your dr. before starting any weight loss plans, and I'd also talk to a good personal trainer before starting to plan a weight loss plan. It'll be pricey, but they are the experts--they'll help you lose weight in a safe manner and also help you implement lifestyle changes to keep it off once it's gone.
I hope this helps you some! GL!
Thanks for all of your stories, advice, and comments. I am feeling so much more positive right now than I was last night.
To answer some questions...
I am technically "morbidly obese" due to my BMI of 50. However, I am still pretty young and have no trouble with a beginner/basic exercise routine. I typically walk a lap little more over a mile around our neighborhood, or do several laps when riding my bike (around 5-6 miles). I also have an exercise ball, free weights, resistance band, stepper, wii fit, a treadmill and an elliptical that I use. I think I have a lot of tools to work with, just lacking consistency.
I have seriously considered joining a gym and working with a personal trainer. However, I do have some time constraints that would make it difficult. My husband and I work at the same company, so we carpool together in the morning. His mother also lives with us, and because she doesnt drive, we also take her to work and pick her up most days. So, we end up getting home late and then I have to fix dinner, and take care of the house (cleaning, laundry, etc). I could drive separately to work and then my husband could get his mom, but then we would be doubling our gas, toll expenses and wear and tear on our cars (one of which is out of commission at the moment, but not expensive to fix).
So, I am more inclined to just hunker down and focus on consistently exercising with what I have. Which, really, is quite a lot! But I don't want to fall in the same trap year after year without any results.
I also need to make an appointment this month for my annual gyno appointment, so I will discuss my options with her. I know that I am probably not ready to TTC right now, but I want to work toward that and so we'll discuss from that vein.
I've also found some really encouraging information about plus size pregnancy in addition to your stories although I am sorry to hear about the complications, too
I am going to focus on eating better and exercising and relax the scale a bit. I am tired of obsessing over it. I've probably lost all the weight I need to lose, but I gain it back over and over. Hopefully eating right and exercise I'll result in weight loss, but if it doesn't... I just want to be healthier.
I'm overweight/obese and honestly don't know my bmi because I think the whole idea of it is crap.
That being said, I believe a lot of my weight struggles and pcos are interrelated. But once again, do I have pcos because I'm overweight or am I overweight because I have PCOS?
I ended up pregnant and had a m/c (a blighted ovum). I ended up pregnant again and had a normal, complication free pregnancy up until the day I delivered. I still wonder if my c/s was due to my weight, the holiday (Thanksgiving) or an actual concern on the doctors part.
But all things considered, I did not have high BP, GD and only gained a total of like 13 pounds when I was pregnant. He was born at term, happy, healthy and (although ornery) normal. There's nothing wrong with getting fit, making healthy choices, but overweight women can (and do) have healthy pregnancies.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Thanks for your story. I am also in the 300s, right around 312 after this disaster of a holiday, prior to that I was only a couple pounds away from the 200s. I would say I am fairly healthy otherwise... I mean I know they don't call it morbid obesity for nothing, but yeah... I don't have too much trouble with daily life, or keeping up with people around me.
Easjer05,
Wow, I am sorry to hear about your pregnancy complications
I don't think that I have PCOS but I suppose it is a possibility. I'll ask my gyno about that.
Good luck with your current pregnancy...hang in there!
Great tip! I will try that. I also feel better when I work out, I have more energy, my blood pressure is perfect, all that. I definitely want to get back there... I have slacked on my exercise routine for the past two months and I am feeling it. I'm with you on the weight fluctuating and being super frustrating... I I'll focus more on exercise...and eating too but aside from the sweets and overindulgence in the holidays my eating is really not bad... I stay away from soda, sweets, bread/carbs, and eat lots of protein and veggies, three square meals, etc. I think it's mostly the exercise I lack on, and that's what helps your metabolism.
While I'm not going to advocate a surgical route as a quick fix, I did just want to share that if you did decide to go that route, that this information is not 100% accurate. I can't speak for other procedures, but before my pregnancy I had a gastric band put in. Not gastric bypass, which reroutes your stomach, but a LAP band. My pregnancy was completely accidental and happened 2 years after I had the procedure, but my physician told me 6 months out I would be cleared to TTC if I wished. This may be due to amount of weight needed to lose, etc. so best to check the circumstances for your particular weight and procedure chosen.
Also, I had no nutritional challenges, which again may be because of my specific procedure. The band can be tightened or loosened, and even though I could keep it somewhat tight, I chose to have it completely loosened during my pregnancy, so I was able to eat without any kind of restrictions.
The last thing I wanted to throw out there is that weight loss is so personal and difficult. I made a personal decision to have this surgery when I was about your age, just after I married. I knew I wanted to be healthier and more energetic for my children. Like I said, it is not a quick fix. You still have to completely change your lifestyle. But it's a tool that helps. It also helped me tremendously after I had the baby, allowing me to lose the weight there as well. I found it to be one of the best decisions I ever made and don't regret it for a second. I do have more energy and am happier overall, which helps me be a better mom. It's not the solution for everyone, but it was for me, so if you were considering for yourself it might be good to get some more information from a physician in your area.
Good luck!