3rd Trimester

is your DH interested in your belly lately?

I know DH works a ton of hours and is tired when he gets home but I gota say his interest in tv, jogging or anything else isn't affected but he doesn't seem interested in the babies growing in my belly. I had new u/s pix today and I told him when he got home, he didnt even go look at them, hours later I said though you'd want to see the pix, he grunted and got up to get them. He has read to them a few times months ago but that has stopped as well. I think other than a quick belly rub before he leaves in the am thats the only contact or interest he shows in the bump/babies. Its really bumming me out, esp since you can really see some big movements with them now and so far Im the only one who has seen it. Am I being hormonal and over sensitive? I just hope he isn't this detatched when the are actually here! He's not a very emotional person as it is, I'm just praying things change when the babies arrive. So with that long vent, sorry, how are your DHs with your belly? Do they pay alot of attention to it? does it come in waves?
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Re: is your DH interested in your belly lately?

  • DH was really not interested in much when I was pregnant with DD to be honest. This pregnancy he is much more interested in feeling kicks and being more involved. I think its because he already has DD and knows what to expect.
    Maddie 08/04/08
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  • MH isn't overly interested in my belly, either, but he is very interested in becoming a father. I'm sure your husband is going to be overjoyed when the babies get here and he'll be anything but detached. It's just that a stomach isn't as interesting as a real life baby. Once they're out it'll be different.
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  • My DH is not very interested in my belly at all.  Not even the baby moving or kicking.  He's more interested in my boobs, to tell you the truth.  I think it's a man thing.  Feeling a baby in someone else's belly doesn't make them feel connected.  Think about it - if your friend was pregnant & you touched her belly & felt the baby move, would you feel magically connected to her child?

    Don't worry, once those little ones are born, you'll catch him snuggling them with his eyes closed like he's soaking up every little moment :-)

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  • thanks, makes me feel much better. I just feel so connected to them and I feel like he isn't but I guess its easier since Im the one carrying them. I'll try to not make it a big deal to DH I thought I'd post here before I told him it bothered me lol Im sure hormones are playing it up in my head. I know hes excited to be a dad, maybe you are all right about it. thanks :)
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  • My DH has never been interested in my belly or intimacy in general this pregnancy, especially the bigger I got. I know he is excited...I just think that some men are overwhelmed and aren't as touchy feely. I do not think it will have anything to do with how affectionate he is when litte one is here, however.
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  • Everyone's different.  My DH loves touching the belly and talking to our unborn daughter.  He's already bonded with her.  He's also just a sensitive, sweet guy who is really looking forward to being a parent.

    That being said, lots of guys/fathers don't care until after the baby is really born. Don't worry. 

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  • from my experience with my dad, hubby, brother etc etc they are not that interested in paying much attention to the belly. and in most cases i dont think i would call it not being interested i would call it being freaked out, or overwhelmed. it gets me down sometimes and i cry but i cant force him. i wish things were different and they might be the second time around
  • DH told me the other day that he does like feeling my belly but he just wants her to get here.  Up until recently, she didn't move regularly when he was feeling for her, so it wasn't that exciting for him.  I think guys don't get as excited about the pregnancy stage, since they can't feel the baby and it sort of doesn't feel real to them.  Don't worry, once those babies come he won't be able to keep his hands off!
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  • My DH is pretty interested in my belly. He always wants me to tell him when the baby is moving so he can feel, etc. I'm sure your DH will be different when the babies are actually here.
  • dH is stressed to the max. He got a big promotion at work in August, it's football season and he's a football coach, and I'm on bed rest now. He does occasionally still talk to the belly though.
  • Mine's not interested.  And when I tell him she's moving and to feel he is obviously not doing it because he wants to.  He barely touches my belly for 5 seconds and I know can't feel her.  He says he doesn't want to press too hard and "hurt her"...  He doesn't do any of the patting, kissing goodbye, talking to belly stuff either.  It irritates me, more some days than others, but in the end it's his loss. 
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  • Not only does DH have zero interest in my belly but I am pretty sure the only times he felt DD or this baby move is when I was standing too close. He is a great father though.
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  • My DH has only shown interest lately now that we really are days away from having LO here. I think it's because he can't wait for the L&D to just be over with. He still doest feel her much without me prompting him. But, now everytime I move or groan he stops to make sure I'm ok. I have always tried to tell him when she is active but he never had much luck in feeling her. She hides and he has a short attention span. DD1 and my mom felt DD2 move first because he would always give up early. So I am sure once LO is here he will be much more interested.
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  • image Pelusa214:

    My DH is not very interested in my belly at all.  Not even the baby moving or kicking.  He's more interested in my boobs, to tell you the truth.  I think it's a man thing.  Feeling a baby in someone else's belly doesn't make them feel connected.  Think about it - if your friend was pregnant & you touched her belly & felt the baby move, would you feel magically connected to her child?

    Don't worry, once those little ones are born, you'll catch him snuggling them with his eyes closed like he's soaking up every little moment :-)

    This!  

  • SO is mostly interested in my belly. He rubs it and says goodbye when he goes to work or kisses it when I walk by him (because my belly gets to him way before I do). He doesn't read to my belly or actually talk to the baby but he has his hand on my belly all the time. Especially when we go to bed and when we wake up in the morning. But I don't really think that how the father acts during the pregnancy reflects to much on what type of father they will be. They don't get to feel things the same way we do so the bonding mostly comes after birth.
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