Military Families

getting pregnant before deployment??

My husband is getting deployed next year, and our son is 7 1/2 months old. We are trying to decide if we want to try to get pregnant with our sencond child either right before he leaves or while he comes home on a 2 week leave. We want to try to keep our kids within a year or two of eachother, and this choice is hard! go through a whole pregnancy with out him, or try to time it so he is home for the birth?? Any advice??

 

THANKS!! :)

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Re: getting pregnant before deployment??

  • Either scenario you would be alone for most of the pregnancy, if not all. Since you have a child already I would really consider waiting until he is home before trying again.

    We planned this pregnancy (husband left in the middle of first tri) and it's been really hard on him missing out on it.

    I have had a lot of complications and have spent a lot of time in the hospital. If you have issues (God forbid) do you have someone in place that could care for your son? 

    There will probably be days when you don't even want to get out of bed but you will have to because you have someone else to care for. Are you prepared for that?

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  • Lace had some good points.

    Something else to consider: What if the pregancy takes a little trying?  Just thinking his 2 week leave could easily fall during an infertile time for you...or maybe that month just won't be your month.

    BFP#1 11.9.10 (EDD 7.15.11) M/C 11.13.10 at 5W1D
    BFP#2 2.5.11 (EDD 10.15.11) DS born 9.28.11 due to Pre-E
    BFP#3 10.2.12 (EDD 6.12.13) MMC 11.24.12 at 11.5w, had passed in 7th week

    BFP#4 8.27.13 (EDD 5.6.14) Please come home with us, LO!
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  • Thanks for the advise!!! Yeah my first pregnancy was pretty hard and stressful, I went into labor at 29 weeks. I do have a bunch of family around so that is nice. There are so many choices to consider... oh boy.
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  • We didn't plan this baby to come while he was on deployment but we got surprised. He will be leaving in the next few months. It is really stressful just thinking that I will be dealing with a 1 yr old and a newborn for a few months until his return. Its also really scary incase there are complications that my family that is in town that will have to help with my DD. For someone who is going through it right now I would honestly suggest you not to if your husband helped out a lot during the last pregnancy.
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  • I'm expecting now and H is deploying in three months.  He will not be here for the birth but will be home a month or so afterwards.  I rather him miss my whole pregnancy and the birth then miss the first 6, 7,or 8 months of the baby's life.  Good luck either way!!!
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  • When decided to continue TTC when DH found out he was deploying. We got PG pretty quickly and DH is leaving shortly. I don't have any kids, so that really played a role in our decision. It has been hard because I've been alone. DH is across the country now doing workups and it's really not fun. We were having a few complications and we both freaked out and decided it would be best for me to go home until he returns. That being said, it's hard to be pregnant alone and can't imagine being PG alond and having another LO to look after.
  • My DH and I decided to TTC before he deployed and I got PG right before he left. It's kind of different for us- it is his 3rd deployment in less than 3 years and I've been with him for all 3. I am 9 weeks now and since we live by our families this time, my mother and MIL have gone with me for my appts and they check in on me because this is our first child. I personally enjoy sending my DH pictures and telling him of the different changes I'm going through. It's really making this deployment fly and it's a morale boost for him. It depends on if you can handle it while he's away. GL!
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  • i guess i was in a similar situation, my daughter is 4 and i didnt want to wait until he came back so we tried and it did take awhile (about 7 months) but i am now 13 weeks. he will be leaving in nov and will be gone (besides r&r) until this baby is 7 months but its what we chose and we're gonna make it work. 

    all the ladies have great points but if you truly believe you are ready and could possibly be pregnant by yourself then i say try. you never know how long it may take to get pregnant so if its meant to be you'll get pregnant.  


  • WOW!! Thanks ladies!! you guys have been so helpfull and it is so much appreciated for your imput! expecially your life experiances! It is not a choice we will be able to make lightly, thankfully we have a year from yesterday till we have to make a choice!! :) thanks again!!
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  • Please keep OPSEC in mind and edit out the "year from ___" part :) Remember that fertility while it might have been easy the first time may not be the second. We got preg first try with our son and spent 2 years trying this last time.
    ~*~ Nikki ~*~ DS born 2/18/08! TTC #2 since 01/2009 11/01 Round #5 Clomid 100 mg, IUI 11/14, at 10dpiui 11/26 Beta:12dpiui 114 11/29 Beta:15dpiui 755 1/9/10 First U/S: TRIPLETS! 6/20/11 And then there were six... http://andbabiesmakesix.wordpress.com/ Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
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