Single Parents

Baby Daddy Issues. HELP!

Okay so it has been awhile since I have been here. My ex and baby daddy takes my son while I am at work in the evening. On several occasions now when I have picked up DS his butt has been bright red with bumps the rash is soooo bad. And his diaper is usually extremely full. I am working on building a case against him so I can get custody but I am not sure how to properly document the diaper rash. Do I take him in to a hospital to properly document it or call the police? I just feel at such a loss...please help. If you need back story let me know. Thank you.

BrittAny Nicole
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Re: Baby Daddy Issues. HELP!

  • No, I don't think you should call the police over a diaper rash, unless you want him to do the same thing to you if your son should ever end up with diaper rash while in your care. 

    Can't you just tell him to change his diaper every hour, two hours, whatever? Send x number of diapers and tell him to use them all?

    Or find someone else to keep your son if he is unable to properly care for him. Changing diapers is a pretty basic expectation. 

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  • I have a hard time taking anyone seriously when they refer to the father of their child as baby daddy. But, I digress.
     
    Take pictures of the diaper rash and the full diapers after you pick up your LO and/or after your ex leaves (not sure where your LO is being cared for). Make sure the pictures are date-stamped. Keep a log of each time this happens with the date and and details. Please do not waste the resources of the hospital and/or police with a case of diaper rash.
     
    Do you have any kind of court ordered custody/parenting plan in place right now?

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  • Have you asked why he doesn't change the diaper?

    Does he have custody at those times? Because it's going to be hard to win full custody if you set a precedent of your ex having your LO while you work. You are basically saying you trust him to take care of your child. If you don't, you need to look for alternate child arrangement.

    Document the rash and full diapers. If the rash get extremely bad, make an appointment with the pedi.

    Jake has bad eczema and his father is bad about putting lotion on. After coming back with a particularly bad case, I emailed his dad saying Jake's eczema was bad, and this is what I suggested to help control it. It worked rather well actually.  So, next time you bring your LO over, I would just tell him to make sure to change the diaper x amount of times to avoid rashes.

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  • See previous post about referring to LO's father as "baby daddy". 

    Anyways, first I would try to discuss this with him.  If that doesn't work, begin documenting to build a case against him.  Echo PP sentiments about taking pictures of the full diaper complete with rash and document the date. 

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  • The first step would be to send an e-mail stating that LO keeps getting a rash in his care and you feel that his diaper isn't being changed often enough. Tell him how often it should be changed to avoid a rash or tell him to apply some cream at each diaper change, etc. Save and print the e-mail for your records to show that you attempted to fix the problem.

    Then begin documenting with pictures and a journal of the dates and any other information related to the rashes. If there is improvement, great. If not, keep on documenting, and send follow up e-mails (which you should also save/print).

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  • Thank you every one for the feed back. 

    I call him baby daddy because that is about as seriously as I take him.

    I have found other arrangements for child care while I work.

    I had emailed him several times in the past in regards to this issue, also emailed his parents, my parents, etc. He always gets extremely upset and blames me. At this point I am attempting a sit down meeting with both his mom and mine with us both.

    Again thank you. And I do apologize if I sound a bit young, I am young. 


    BrittAny Nicole
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