2nd Trimester

Kinda grumpy....am I the only one who HATES...

...when people ask what sex we're hoping for?

We're hoping for a healthy baby.  Period.

It's especially irritating because usually the person goes on to tell us WHAT we should be hoping for.  We should be hoping for  a girl, so our daughter can have a sister.  Or we should be hoping for a boy, because then we'd have the "perfect family".

I am terrified for the ultrasound because I worry about the baby's health, so maybe that's why my tolerance is so low for these types of comments.  Like regardless of what sex the baby ends up being, someone will think that it's disappointing.

BAH.

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Re: Kinda grumpy....am I the only one who HATES...

  • It's definitely annoying when people ask that.  First of all, I just want my baby to be healthy.  Secondly, I don't know the sex yet.  What's the point in hoping for the baby to be a particular sex?
  • image Barbara&Joseph:
    It's definitely annoying when people ask that.  First of all, I just want my baby to be healthy.  Secondly, I don't know the sex yet.  What's the point in hoping for the baby to be a particular sex?

    If someone really starts annoying me, what I say is "If I was going to waste my time hoping and praying for something I can't control, it would be the health".  Otherwise I try to be more polite.  When really I want to punch them in the face, lol

    TTC #1 for one year with annovulation....
    Clomid Cycle #1: 50mg = BFP
    =Beautiful baby girl born May 23, 2009
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    TTC#2: BFP Cycle #1, no fertility meds!
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  • Agreed!  I also hate when we tell people we're having a boy they ask if we are ok with that and is that what we wanted?  Well, he's healthy so far, so yes, it's what we wanted.  Some people think babies are Burger King and you can have them your way.
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  • i hate it too! MIL is the worst she kept telling me she is thinking it's a girl so she can get her dissapointment out of the way. really!! (we already have DD so she wants me to have a boy). everyday she says this and everyday she asks what I want and I say a healthy baby. well turns out we are having a boy, but there is something possibly wrong with his kidney so I can't help but feel even more anoyed at her, like see you got your boy, but at what cost. grr, ok rant over.
  • We arent finding out what we are having ( people say stuff about that too). Anyway, when people say " do you know what you are having" I usually respond with platypus....it definitely throws them off!!! The look on their face makes the question a bit easier to hear over and over. 

    (sorry if people don't get this humor, obviously a healthy baby is my first concern)

     




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  • While I don't doubt that there are intentionally rude MILs and family members, I think most people are just trying to make polite conversation about your new addition.  As hormonal pregnant women, we tend to be annoyed by most any question relevant to our growing bellies or babies or plans for either, so discussing the gender seems to be one of the safest topics.  I think everyone assumes you most want a healthy baby. 
  • But to go on and imply that there is something wrong with one sex or the other?  I get bothered (even while not pregnant) that people get so jacked up with the sex...

    But yes, if I wasn't pregnant I'm sure I wouldn't feel like punching them, lol
    TTC #1 for one year with annovulation....
    Clomid Cycle #1: 50mg = BFP
    =Beautiful baby girl born May 23, 2009
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    TTC#2: BFP Cycle #1, no fertility meds!
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Oh but don't respond with Boy or Girl because if you do it becomes a hatefest on why you didn't want the other sex...
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  • I would never say that...because I really don't care?  And I swear...no one believes me!  lol!

    TTC #1 for one year with annovulation....
    Clomid Cycle #1: 50mg = BFP
    =Beautiful baby girl born May 23, 2009
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    TTC#2: BFP Cycle #1, no fertility meds!
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • You aren't the only one.  It's VERY annoying.  I had a feeling I was having a girl..don't know why but that was my gut feeling.  I didn't care what the sex was as long as it's a HEALTHY baby. But bc I said that I thought it was a girl some people seem to think I WANTED a girl.  So ANNOYING.  They just don't get what a gut feeling is.  I had a 50/50 chance of being correct..I mean come on.  
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  • image IamAmom2B:
    You aren't the only one.  It's VERY annoying.  I had a feeling I was having a girl..don't know why but that was my gut feeling.  I didn't care what the sex was as long as it's a HEALTHY baby. But bc I said that I thought it was a girl some people seem to think I WANTED a girl.  So ANNOYING.  They just don't get what a gut feeling is.  I had a 50/50 chance of being correct..I mean come on.  

    Aw, that's annoying too.  I actually have no gut feelings, and some people give me the side-eye about that.  Give me a break!  So I'm just saying "boy" because this pregnancy has been so different than last time (Which means nothing, I know, but it shuts people up)

    TTC #1 for one year with annovulation....
    Clomid Cycle #1: 50mg = BFP
    =Beautiful baby girl born May 23, 2009
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    TTC#2: BFP Cycle #1, no fertility meds!
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Geez ... if that question really bugs you, you're going to have a rough time of motherhood. Chill out. Obviously you want a healthy baby of either gender. This isn't freaking China. But it's not a crime or a sin to want one gender over the other, either ... it doesn't mean you'll love the baby less.
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  • I already have a child and handle motherhood fine, thank you.  But that doesn't mean I want my MIL whining if my child is a girl.
    TTC #1 for one year with annovulation....
    Clomid Cycle #1: 50mg = BFP
    =Beautiful baby girl born May 23, 2009
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    TTC#2: BFP Cycle #1, no fertility meds!
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • With all that said, I'm sure if we're able to find out the sex at our next ultrasound, I won't be getting as many comments (I'm getting a LOT) and will probably be able to deal with them better.  I won't actually punch anyone, I swear.

    TTC #1 for one year with annovulation....
    Clomid Cycle #1: 50mg = BFP
    =Beautiful baby girl born May 23, 2009
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    TTC#2: BFP Cycle #1, no fertility meds!
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I'm getting annoyed with that question too because I honestly don't have a preferance, but when I say that nobody believes me. That and when people tell you all these crazy things like don't eat chocolate or put your hands above your head, I hear all sorts of weird old wives tales (customer service, everyone seems to have an opinion). People have been having babies since the beginning of time, it's only been in recient time that we've been able to be as pampered as we are during our pregenancies! Sorry, I had to vent a little =)
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  • This post has been edited by a moderator
    to remove the redirecting hyperlink spam.

    PLEASE STOP SPAMMING THE BOARDS
  • "We should be hoping for a girl, so our daughter can have a sister. Or we should be hoping for a boy, because then we'd have the "perfect family"." BARF

    These kind of comments irritate me too. Babies are a blessing period. and there is no "perfect" family.

    Just because you have a girl doesn't mean she is going to be a princess and want to go shopping with you and get her nails done. And a boy not want to go to ball games and play sports. We seem to forget that kids will have their own personality regardless of their sex.

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  • I know it's annoying, but this is one of those situations where you can't control what people say, you can only control how much you let it bother you.   It really is your choice. 

    Either the person meant to offend/annoy you, so why give them the satisfaction?...  or they honestly didn't mean any harm, in which case it would be in your best interest to forgive them for their insensitivity, let it go, and move on.

     

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  • I think if you're going to get so worked up over something so silly then you're going to have a rough time once the baby is here.  I recommend taking a chill pill.  Wink
  • Lol I actually couldn't agree more.

    Great response!

     

     

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