3rd Trimester

When to let visiting begin after c-section delivery?

I am having a scheduled c-secton tomorrow because current u/s shows our LO as 11 pounds and 2 ounces (I do know this could be wrong) and since I have GD my doctor insisted for both mine and baby girl's health that I only wait for tomorrow.

Anyhow, my question actually has to do with when to "allow" our families to come and visit. I've already explained to my parents and his that tomorrow night is the earliest I'd like them to come, since my surgery is planned for the morning and I'd like first day recovery and bonding time reserved for my DH and I.

My hospital lets the baby's Mom state what visiting hours will be, but neither set of parents are listening to DH or I about that fact. My parents are insisting on being at the hospital in the waiting room from surgery time till they can come in and see me and baby. While my DH's parents are insisting on getting a call from my DH advising them that the baby is ready to be seen, even if I am not up for visitors.

I should add that I do plan on breast feeding and co-sleeping in the hospital so my doctor and the hospital nursess plan on brining the baby into my recovery room at 2 hours after delivery for feeding and leaving her with me as soon as I can stand on my own (I'll be getting a spinal). 

Our extended family rather than asking my DH or I when they can visit have asked our parents - we are 40 and 35 respectively so that alone bothers me and I am thinking of not even putting them on the list of visitors. My DH would like to though, if not for visiting tomorrow night than for over the weekend.

He has 3 nieces and a nephew but since they are not of certain age hospital allows in (only young kids allowed are siblings) we are at least safe there. Any and all advice is welcome. 

TIA! 

Re: When to let visiting begin after c-section delivery?

  • I had my DD#2 at 1:11 am. I was in recovery until 6:00am ( no rooms available). I got a little sleep and people started coming at 10:00 until visiting hours were over at the end of the day. It was fun and loved seeing everyone BUT... My bp went up drastically since I hadn't had much sleep and was very worn out. I suggest being able to take a really good nap and have some alone time with baby first. ( Iwould still let the grandparents in but keep out the siblings, friends, etc. until later)

    Good Luck!

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  • I'd wait to see how you feel and then decide!  play it by ear!

    I had my 1st via c section at 112am on a Friday and my MIL was there sometime that morning.  I forget when my parents came.  I was still in recovery.  I recall wanting her to come so it was ok.  But, you may not and you don't want to feel obligated if you already said people could come.

    I'm having this c-section at 530pm and I know visiting hours are over at 8pm so it won't be until the next morning.  But, I plan to tell people that we'll call when we are ready.  I want to make sure I feel up to it and have my own bonding time with the baby.  Plus, I want my first DD to be the first visitor!

    good luck to you tomorrow!   


  • I didn't have any visitors in the hospital after my Csection.  Our families aren't in town.  Some friends were bummed, but they got over it. 

    Honestly, I think it would have been easier to have visitors soon after the delivery than the days after.  A couple days in the hospital and no sleep and I wasn't up to see anyone.

    I think you should play it by ear and decide how you feel.  You could be pumped with adrenaline and excitement and want to see them, or just be pooped and say no thanks.

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  • I had my 1st c/s at 12:30pm and my mom, sister, DH's sister, mom and dad were all there waiting. I was in recovery for 45 mins and my mom and sister actually walked with me from recovery to my room. They were all in to see DS right after and I didn't mind one bit. DH's family didn't stay long, his Dad left when I was going to nurse for the 1st time and my family stayed for about 2 hours. We had a few hours after that before other people came to visit. If you decide you don't want anyone there until that night, that is what the nurses are for. Tell them when you get there, that you don't care who comes you don't want to see anyone until later. Good luck with your c/s mine is the 30th!! :)
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  • I have started spreading the word among our families that I will want some time to recover and bond with baby after the delivery- regardless of how that delivery takes place. If they want to sit there and wait for hours, that's their problem. I will stick to my plan unless I feel differently at the time. I do know I want time for me and baby to attempt breastfeeding and spend a little time together before letting visitors back.
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  • I would stick to my plans. Let the hospital and nurses handle them.If they get angry, oh well that is what they get for not listening to you in the first place. As for extended family pass it along about when they can visit, whether it is at home or the hospital. Remember your health is more important than them coming for a visit to see the LO.

    I'm just glad my parents aren't nearby or my mother would demand to be in the OR, she's a former surgical nurse.

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  • I would think with a planned csection you would be physically ok for visitors as soon as you got out of recovery and settled in to your room. However, I totally understand not wanting visitors that quickly and I'm sure I would feel the same way if I were in your position. I had an unplanned c/s with DD after 21 hours of labor. I was in recovery for an hour and then moved to my room. As soon as we got in the room I told DH to call my parents and let them know the details of the birth but to ask them to please allow us a couple hours to rest and work on BFing before they showed up. They refused and showed up right away. I asked the nurses not to let anyone in until we said it was ok. They let them in anyway. It totally sucked. I physically felt awful from everything I had been through (mostly with the labor, not the c/s) and I was just getting to see DD for the first time (I didn't get to have her with me in recovery). I'm also a very private person and did not want anyone around while I was BFing and my mom refused to leave for that and when the nurses came in to clean me up and change my pad, etc. It was so incredibly uncomfortable for me and really just an awful situation. Because of what I have been through, with all that, I am a bit paranoid and would suggest you not call anyone until you are ready for visitors. The moment you get in to your room I would let your nurse as well as the nurses station know you do not want visitors until you give the ok. People can be SO rude. I never expected my family to act the way they did and I sincerely hope you have a much better experience than I did. Good luck with your birth and recovery!
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  • Honestly, it's all up to you. With DD my mom, her boyfriend, one of my sisters, my MIL and DH's best friend were in the room right away. Everyone else waited until the next day (DD was born at 5:39pm). And I was perfectly fine with that.
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  • To each their own: You need to decide what you and your SO are comfortable with. Plus, part of it will depend on how you feel after your time in recovery. If you are not up for visitors, ask people to wait. The day after the c/s was when I was most tired, the day of I was kind of wired from the excitement of my new baby.

    For us:

    Both our families were in the waiting room. DS was born at 2:40pm, the 3 of us were in recovery for about 2 hours. Then we were taken to our post partum room and grandparents came in about 20 minutes later. My sisters were also there and came in after the grandparents.

    Friends and repeat visits from grandparents and aunts were the next day.

    We are planning on the same plan this time, the only exception being we want a little time alone so DS can meet his new sibling.

     

  • My c/s is scheduled for 5pm, My DH and our immediate family will all be there. As for anyone else I've asked they wait til the next day. I have a gazillion relatives that live nearby and I know most of them will come to visit. We're all on FB so I'll post that morning the plan and my mom can send out word once she is born.
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  • I have been debating this, as well. My CS is scheduled for 1230. I have to be there at 1030 for pre-op. Then the Post-Op rooms (not the recovery rooms) have  astrict "quiet time" from 2-4pm. It almost doesn't seem worth it to have people there while I'm in surgery. My mom will be in the OR with me, but everyone else will be in the waiting room. I figure by the time I get to my Post-Op room it will be the "quiet time" hours, so maybe I should just tell people to come back after 4?

    Good luck with the CS and everything else!

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  • It all depends on how you react to the spinal too.  I reacted horribly and was vomiting for about 16 hours straight without relief.  Nothing they tried made me feel any better - they think it was a reaction to the duramorph - a long acting morphine they put in most spinals now.  So I was miserable. 

    My parents were there when I had the c-section and saw me in recovery and once I got to my room.  It helped me to have my parents there - it helped to have other people be able to empty the basin for me other than just having DH do it.  But if my inlaws had been there, I would probably have kicked them out.  They stress me out too much and I already felt like crap.

    This time, if I end up with a c-section again, we probably won't have anyone visit til either later in the day or the next day depending how I tolerate it this time.  My parents will be watching DS so they won't come until they can bring him too and I won't want him to see me sick.

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  • I would play it by ear and wait to see how you feel. Not to say there will be but you never know if anything may arise and cause recovery to be longer and I know I would not want anyone besides DH holding baby before I got to hold him/her to bond and feed. 

    With DD I did not have a c-section but I know with both hospitals DD and now DS you really don't have to worry about visitors if you don't want. Just tell the nursing staff no visitors until you give the OK. We even have rooms at my current hospital that have keypads and unless you can verify a 4 digit code with the nurses station they won't even let you in the womens center and if you don't have the code you couldn't even get in the room. If my family lived close by I would be requesting one of these rooms.


  • I limited visitors.  First hour was just DH, DS, and I.  Then it was whoever I wanted, (my mom, sister, best friend were all waiting in the waiting room.)  My dad came that evening.  Otherwise I declined visitors.  Honestly I was really tired, was enjoying the time with DS, and felt that everyone else could wait.

    I told my in-laws that they will NOT be coming to the hospital and that once I'm home we can definitely arrange a get together.  I really want my time in the hospital to be focused on DS2 and my recovery so that I can bounce and get back to DS1 at home.  I'm afraid that if I open the flood gates I'm going to be exhausted when I get home.

     Good luck tomorrow, I'm so excited to see pictures once you've recovered.  Oh and steal those mesh panties, as many of them as you can :)

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