I have been seeking some sort of comfort from this site for a little while and thought it was time to introduce myself. Just to warn people I did have a full term baby, not a m/c or a stillborn. I don't want to upset anyone by my story and maybe I don't belong here since most of you lost your babies much sooner than I did. I know how lucky I am to have had her living and breathing for 5 days, but I still lost her. She would be 2 months old today.
Our little Eleanora was born perfectly healthy on June 17, 2011.. We brought her home on Father?s day. She filled our lives and home with so much joy and happiness. She had jaundice and was under the phototherapy at the hospital on her last day there, but we were cleared and able to go home with no further treatment. We woke up Wednesday just like any other day in our new lives. I was feeding my precious baby when I noticed she was really yellow. I brought her into to my husband, Nick, to see if it was just me. So we called the pediatrician right away and they brought us in. When we were putting her in her car seat I noticed she was a little limp, but she was still breathing and her heart was still beating. We waited in the waiting room for what felt like forever. The doctor rushed in and then my life crashed. He said she was no longer breathing and started doing CPR. They called 911 and eventually we were taken by ambulance to the hospital. I knew it wasn?t good when the driver didn?t turn the siren on, but I was trying to stay hopeful that the ER doctors could do something. In the ER they worked on her for more than 45 minutes with no change. She never breathed on her own. It was, as you can imagine from your own experience, surreal. I felt like I was watching a movie or an episode of Grey?s Anatomy. They put me in her stretcher and handed her over to me. She was still warm and still so perfectly beautiful. It still doesn?t feel real.
Married since 4-11-09 to the love of my life.
TTC since 8-10
BFP #1 - 10-23-10, my beautiful Eleanora Lynn was born 6-17-11 full term. She was rushed to the hospital on 6-22-11 when she turned yellow. They could not save her. Doctors have no answers and no cause of death.
BFP #2 - 11-29-11, Baby Pierce arrive on 7-27-12 happy and healthy. He is the light of my life.