March 2012 Moms

Happy? with every minute of the day sickness?

I feel so badly for my husband, because while hes super excited about our little egg, Im feel pretty reserved and guarded about the whole thing! I feel ill all the time, and its mostly sleepiness! When Im feeling fine, my boobs  are usually feeling like theyre getting ripped off when every move. And on top of that, I always keep it in the back of my mind that its still early and I could lose it!

 I think it would have been an easier transition if our families had taken the news a bit better, even though they all are fine with it now. My sister in law still wants to have a "talk" with me.

Is anyone else having a difficult time?

Re: Happy? with every minute of the day sickness?

  • Trust me you are not alone! I'm 11 weeks and I didn't start getting more comfortable with the idea until recently. It's weird having people congratulate you and you're kinda like, "Um yeah, thanks..." It wasn't the best timing in the world for my husband and I because I was really sick when I got pregnant and had/have been laid off for several months. So though a baby is a blessing and all, I just had too many reasons to keep me from feeling that excitement. Not to mention, once the pregnancy symptoms started kicking in, it was soo much worse!
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  • Oh man! My husbands hours were cut down to only 16 a week which equals two days.

     And Im a waitress, so wokring when every smell makes me gag is rough!

    Dont you feel bad sometimes though? Not to be as excited as you should? I mean its not that I dont want this baby, I really do, but I just cant get over all the bad stuff just yet. I always thought Id be in absolute bliss from the moment I found out til the very end!

  • image Casikay09:

    Dont you feel bad sometimes though? Not to be as excited as you should?

     I'm not going to lie, in the first few weeks after I found out. I was silently wishing for a miscarriage. I thought logically, well this is my first so at least I know I can get pregnant. But I don't know how I'm going to do this so if I miscarried right now it would probably be better in the long run. I know it's an awful thing to say but its true and I'm willing to admit it in case anyone else ever felt this way and felt guilty about it like I did.

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  • image sweet_nitenale:
    image Casikay09:

    Dont you feel bad sometimes though? Not to be as excited as you should?

     I'm not going to lie, in the first few weeks after I found out. I was silently wishing for a miscarriage. I thought logically, well this is my first so at least I know I can get pregnant. But I don't know how I'm going to do this so if I miscarried right now it would probably be better in the long run. I know it's an awful thing to say but its true and I'm willing to admit it in case anyone else ever felt this way and felt guilty about it like I did.

    I give you kudos for being willing to share your feelings here, and I can understand how someone would experience fear & nervousness about an unplanned pregnancy.  I think even people who plan a preganncy still go through some sort of shock and thoughts of "OMG, this is really real." 

    However, as someone who experienced a m/c of a planned pregnancy and had immense feelings of sadness and sorrow over my loss, I can't imagine what feelings someone would go through if they actually wished for a m/c and it happened.  I hope you never have to experience the pain of a m/c and hope things will work out for you and your LO in the long run.

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  • image sweet_nitenale:

     I'm not going to lie, in the first few weeks after I found out. I was silently wishing for a miscarriage. I thought logically, well this is my first so at least I know I can get pregnant. But I don't know how I'm going to do this so if I miscarried right now it would probably be better in the long run. I know it's an awful thing to say but its true and I'm willing to admit it in case anyone else ever felt this way and felt guilty about it like I did.

                                                                               

    Indifferent

    why have unprotected sex if you aren't ready for a baby?  i'm trying hard not to judge here, but to wish for a m/c?  wtf is wrong with you? 


    Ryan Keith born 2.19.12 weighing 8lb 15oz. At six weeks 12lb 4oz.

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  • image Texas77again:
    image sweet_nitenale:

     I'm not going to lie, in the first few weeks after I found out. I was silently wishing for a miscarriage. I thought logically, well this is my first so at least I know I can get pregnant. But I don't know how I'm going to do this so if I miscarried right now it would probably be better in the long run. I know it's an awful thing to say but its true and I'm willing to admit it in case anyone else ever felt this way and felt guilty about it like I did.

                                                                               

    Indifferent

    why have unprotected sex if you aren't ready for a baby?  i'm trying hard not to judge here, but to wish for a m/c?  wtf is wrong with you? 

     Haha! Gee, thanks for the support! I'm actually choosing not to take offense at what you just said because after going thru this I learned first hand that thinking you're ready for a baby and then actually finding out your pregnant can really change things. Its scary, nerve wracking news.

    I was honestly surprised at my reaction as well. But I chose to be honest on here because I highly doubt I'm the first new mom to ever freak out feeling like they weren't ready for it, when they discovered they were pregnant.

    So, Texas77 you can judge me if you like. I am 28 yrs old, married and have a house. But once the reality of the situation set in, I freaked out because I have VERY high opinions on what it means to be a mother and provider and I started panicking that I wouldn't be able to live up to my standards given certain difficulties that have been going on in my life. I'm not ashamed. Big Smile

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  • so you say you have "very high opinions on what it means to be a mother" and then you say you secretly wish that your baby would die.  mmmmkay. 

    i get being scared and unsure if you are ready.  i think that is normal and i'm sure countless women can agree with that feeling.  i also think that is good, it means that you want to be the best mom that you can be and you are concerned about your baby. 

    imo, wishing for a m/c is the exact opposite of what i said above.  clearly you've never had a m/c.  let me tell you, they fuckking suck!  they hurt, both physically and mentally.  the physical pain goes away at some point, but the emotional pains may never end. 

    i know a woman here who wished for a m/c and got her wish.  it was awful and when it was happening to her she wanted to take it all back.  she then struggled for a long time to get pg again.  sure hope that doesn't happen to you, but if it should i hope that we can find a way to support you. 

     


    Ryan Keith born 2.19.12 weighing 8lb 15oz. At six weeks 12lb 4oz.

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  • image Texas77again:

    so you say you have "very high opinions on what it means to be a mother" and then you say you secretly wish that your baby would die.  mmmmkay. 

    i get being scared and unsure if you are ready.  i think that is normal and i'm sure countless women can agree with that feeling.  i also think that is good, it means that you want to be the best mom that you can be and you are concerned about your baby. 

    imo, wishing for a m/c is the exact opposite of what i said above.  clearly you've never had a m/c.  let me tell you, they fuckking suck!  they hurt, both physically and mentally.  the physical pain goes away at some point, but the emotional pains may never end. 

    i know a woman here who wished for a m/c and got her wish.  it was awful and when it was happening to her she wanted to take it all back.  she then struggled for a long time to get pg again.  sure hope that doesn't happen to you, but if it should i hope that we can find a way to support you. 

    To be clear, I said I felt that way at first. I could have went with my scared feelings and ran out and got an abortion, thus killing my baby just like thousands and thousands of women do everyday! Now I am in now way condoning abortion. My point is, it doesn't seem like its necessary to badger me about negative feelings I had about my pregnancy when I was just being honest. You have no idea what the circumstances were in my life at the time I found out I was pregnant so how about you and I stop hijacking this post, when the original poster was the one needing support about her own negative feelings related to her pregnancy.

     I'm sorry Casikay. I absolutely hate it when people argue back and forth on someone else's post and I usually don't but I felt the need to stand up for myself and anyone else who has struggled the way I have. So again, I'm sorry. NO MORE, I promise! ;)

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  • image sweet_nitenale:
    image Casikay09:

    Dont you feel bad sometimes though? Not to be as excited as you should?

     I'm not going to lie, in the first few weeks after I found out. I was silently wishing for a miscarriage. I thought logically, well this is my first so at least I know I can get pregnant. But I don't know how I'm going to do this so if I miscarried right now it would probably be better in the long run. I know it's an awful thing to say but its true and I'm willing to admit it in case anyone else ever felt this way and felt guilty about it like I did.

     

    The first time I got pregnant this last February was the day after I got engaged. Yes, THE VERY NEXT DAY. No idea I was pregnant. Having to deal with that and plan a wedding in 4 months was so stressful and I had the same thoughts. The timing was just not what I would have wanted and was just so crazy. And then I had a miscarriage. I had so many mixed emotions and was so sad to lose the baby just when I had started to get really excited about it, but I know what you are going through. I don't think any of us can ever really be ready for becoming a parent and having such a big responsibility for another person. Just take a deep breath and know that everything will turn out the way it is supposed to and that you will be FINE.

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  • Its a bit upsetting that other women are so quick to judge. Texaswhatever, its a shame that as a woman you arent as respectful as you should. Our dear friend here was expressing to us what Im sure lots of woem are feeling right now! Does it mean she wants her child dead, NO! Does it mean thats she freaking out because the sudden shock of actually bringing a child into this world can at times feel like a heavy load! You need to get off you high horse! The poor girl is going through something, shes not sitting there telling all of us that she wanted to get an abortion, which you should keep in mind, she didnt! She panicked, like I did, and like many other women out there did!

        Now in response to our dear friend who is having a harder time than me, Im really sorry that you feel or felt so badly! How far along are you? How is the morning sickness? I've been so tired lately, I stayed in my Pjs all day yesterday, gagging and lightheaded! Its funny though, Because I feel more sick than pregnant, I just feel so rotten! My mother went out and bought us a few thins, including a swing for the baby, and its sitting in the corner of my room. When Im lying in bed, and look over at, and see the picture with the little baby in the swing, thats when it hits me! If you ever need to tlak, just let me know!

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