Baby Names

Anyone else feel this way re: middle names?

I really like when middle names have a special meaning.  I feel like that gives purpose to a middle name (and I don't mind the idea of no middle name either). Whether it be the parent's middle name, a family name, a significant place, etc.  I don't personally understand giving a middle name just for the sound of it, or because it is another name the parent likes- that is for the first name IMO.

Obviously JMO, and people can name their kids whatever they damn well please :)

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Re: Anyone else feel this way re: middle names?

  • I kind of go back and forth. Sometimes I feel like it should be a family name, or something that's significant to my husband and I. But sometimes I just like the way a FN and MN sound together so much, that it's hard to eliminate it because it doesn't have meaning.

     

  • I totally agree.

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  • I'm curious (for the OP and Keri and anyone else)...does your own MN have a lot of significance?

    My MN, though common (Marie) was the name of a very dear friend of my parents. Even though I'm named after someone they loved so much, I've never met the woman, I don't know anything about her and being named after her hasn't affected my life, nor do I feel like it's a special name (for me) in any way.

    Just curious about other people's experiences. 

  • Mine actually does not, but now it is also DD's mn so it does for her (and now for me too :)
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  • Since we used family names with our first daughter (Stella Simonne), we wanted to use a family name with our second daughter as a middle name, too. (I'd already been set on Sloane since viewing "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" back in the day [which is only slightly embarrassing to admit, by the way]).

    My husband's grandmother had once told me that her sassy mother-in-law's name (and so my husband's great-grandmother) was named Ava. This was a name that I'd thought was pretty even before it's huge popularity spike, and so we decided upon Sloane Ava. One month before the baby was born, we learned that his great-grandmother's name was actually Eva, however, by dint of word association, Sloane Eva automatically brings to my mind Boniva (the osteoporosis drug). We ended up just staying with Ava because I liked the flow. 

    Sometimes I think a good anecdote is just as good as a special meaning, or perhaps the two are synonymous in my mind anyhow :)
  • I honestly dont think it matters. If it has great meaning thats fine, but if it is a name your parents just loved why not?

    My middle name had no significance....my childrens do...i dont think it matters. If my mom had some name i hated i wouldnt give it to my daughter just because it meant something.

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  • image ashleyaugust7:

    I really like when middle names have a special meaning.  I feel like that gives purpose to a middle name (and I don't mind the idea of no middle name either). Whether it be the parent's middle name, a family name, a significant place, etc.  I don't personally understand giving a middle name just for the sound of it, or because it is another name the parent likes- that is for the first name IMO.

    Obviously JMO, and people can name their kids whatever they damn well please :)

    I agree 100%. My husband's middle name is his father's first name. My middle name is my mother's middle name and my paternal grandmother's middle name (I also share her first name). I have always felt special that I shared names with my mom and grandma. Both my parents passed away before I had any children. My son's middle name is my father's first name and this time I'm having a girl and her middle name will be my mom's first name. Even if my children don't quite understand the significance, I am glad that I am able to honor them in that way.

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  • I'm also a fan of MNs (and FNs) with meaning.

    DD's MN (Carol) doesn't flow 100% with her FN, but it's both mine and DH's mothers' names - so it was a no brainer.

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  • I definitely felt this way about DD's mn (it's in honor of the patron saint of my parents' home country), but I have to admit that as we throw out names for a potential second daughter, most of the names we're considering for the mn spot are names that don't have a deeper meaning. They simply don't "cut it" for the fn spot- for example, guilty pleasure names like Coralia and Xiomara. I have absolutely no "connection" with these names except that they're much more common in my culture and I have always really liked them.  

    I guess you could argue the cultural value of these names, but how different is that from someone liking the sound of a particular name just because they're used to hearing it?

     

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  • I totally agree, OP.

    For DH and I we will only consider middle names with meaning.  My middle name is my mom's MN and the name of my dad's sister who passed when she was 12.  Our MN's are also a derivitive of my grandma's MN. I think DH's MN is from his mom's side of the family but I'm not 100% sure. 

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  • image HannahO28:

    I'm curious (for the OP and Keri and anyone else)...does your own MN have a lot of significance?

    My MN, though common (Marie) was the name of a very dear friend of my parents. Even though I'm named after someone they loved so much, I've never met the woman, I don't know anything about her and being named after her hasn't affected my life, nor do I feel like it's a special name (for me) in any way.

    Just curious about other people's experiences. 

    My mn is Sylvia, after my godmother (except she spells it Silvia). I'm very close with her and she has always played a special role in my life- she made me my quincea?era dress, for example, and when I found out I was pg, I flew to Miami so I could tell her in person. Before I was married, I used to spend some of the major holidays with her (now that's impossible because we divide between my parents and DH's for holidays).

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  • image magsugar13:

    I honestly dont think it matters. If it has great meaning thats fine, but if it is a name your parents just loved why not?

    My middle name had no significance....my childrens do...i dont think it matters. If my mom had some name i hated i wouldnt give it to my daughter just because it meant something.

    That's how I feel too.  My middle name doesn't have any meaning.  To me, a lot of people also seem to dig around in the family and pick out names of random relatives they may not even know anything about.  That doesn't make a lot of sense to me either.  I love it when MNs have true meaning for you and think that is very special, but don't think they have to have that.

  • My DH and I agreed that if we couldn't find a middle name that was a family name or meant something to us we would just not use a middle name for our child. My DH does not have a middle name.

    My middle name is Ella after my Great-Grandmother. Ella is a name that has been in our family for generations, and with the name passes down a ring and a set of crystal.

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  • image Moneypenny424:
      To me, a lot of people also seem to dig around in the family and pick out names of random relatives they may not even know anything about.  That doesn't make a lot of sense to me either.  I love it when MNs have true meaning for you and think that is very special, but don't think they have to have that.

    I'm guilty of doing this (the aforementioned Coralia comes from a distant relation on the family tree). Since I'm a first generation American, I look to the family tree as a way to honor my cultural heritage. I guess that's what gives the names "meaning" to me. I like to think that my deceased grandparents, who didn't speak any English, would be able to pronounce my children's names.

     

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  • My DD is named after my mother's mother [Gisella] and her middle name [Rose] is for my mother, Roseann, and my MIL, Rosa.  I always loved my grandmother's named and said I would name my first daughter after her and so H never fought me on the name and was happy with it.

    FWIW My niece's middle name is Gisella also.

    I do not have a middle name and neither do my siblings.

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  • image anna7602:

    image Moneypenny424:
      To me, a lot of people also seem to dig around in the family and pick out names of random relatives they may not even know anything about.  That doesn't make a lot of sense to me either.  I love it when MNs have true meaning for you and think that is very special, but don't think they have to have that.

    I'm guilty of doing this (the aforementioned Coralia comes from a distant relation on the family tree). Since I'm a first generation American, I look to the family tree as a way to honor my cultural heritage. I guess that's what gives the names "meaning" to me. I like to think that my deceased grandparents, who didn't speak any English, would be able to pronounce my children's names.

     

    That makes sense to me.  We are looking at Italian names to honor DH's heritage and culture, as well as typical West Indian names to honor my family.  They just may not be names actually used in our family, but they'd still have meaning.  I've also considered a middle name that would honor someone I greatly respect, but isn't a family member--I don't think that is less valid than naming after a family member.

  • The entire name, for me, has to have meaning whether that is honoring my history/family or the interpretation of the f/m/l name all translate into a message.
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  • I'm totally with you on this - but some of the names in our family are just too horrible sounding to use. Stick out tongue
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  • image ashleyaugust7:

    I really like when middle names have a special meaning.  I feel like that gives purpose to a middle name (and I don't mind the idea of no middle name either). Whether it be the parent's middle name, a family name, a significant place, etc.  I don't personally understand giving a middle name just for the sound of it, or because it is another name the parent likes- that is for the first name IMO.

    Obviously JMO, and people can name their kids whatever they damn well please :)

     

    I agree 100%.    

    I don't get the posts asking for middle names that "go with" a certain name.    

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  • image HannahO28:

    I'm curious (for the OP and Keri and anyone else)...does your own MN have a lot of significance?

    My MN, though common (Marie) was the name of a very dear friend of my parents. Even though I'm named after someone they loved so much, I've never met the woman, I don't know anything about her and being named after her hasn't affected my life, nor do I feel like it's a special name (for me) in any way.

    Just curious about other people's experiences. 

    My middle name was my mother's sister's middle name.  Her sister died of leukemia the year prior to my birth.  The name is Greek for  'light' - my first daughter was given the middle name of my p.great-grandmother which, while a different name, is also translated in Greek for 'light'.  I chose the name more to honor my grandfather than his mother (whom I'm a dead ringer for, but who passed away before my birth).  

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  • I completely agree, to the point that I am guilty of going on rants about it on this board after seeing one to many _____ Grace(s). I got flamed for telling people to pick something of significance even if it sounded silly (I think I used a favorite colour as a example). I love that a friend of mine gave her DD the MN of Muse. Myself and my children have MNs from loved family members, Elizabeth is a name I passed to DD and she is now at least the fifth generation to carry the name. I would have been all about a fun, meaningful MN but for us family names were to important.
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  • I think Middle Names are very special. My middle name is Mae (after my great-grandmother on my father's side) So when I had my son his middle name is Etheridge after my great grand-father. Middle names in my family are something special. My husband's MN is his father's FN and my older sister's MN is the same as my mother's and my little sister's initials spell my grandfather's MN, Lee. It's all over the place. LOL. So now that I am expecting a girl in December her FN is Freyja which is an old Norse goddess. We were having a difficult time finding an appropriate MN for her from his side of the family. We thought about Rhoda or Ruth because of DH's mother and grandmother but I am atheist and they sounded to biblical for me. We finally decided on Eloise. It is respectable and strong and has an old feel to it just like me son's MN... even though it has no significant family meaning. :)

    I guess to make a long story short I like having MN have a nice meaning but I didn't like any of my DH's female names! So I made my own and my to-be daughter's name, Freyja Eloise, has a very significant meaning to DH and me. 

  • I like middle names with meanings.  Both my brother and I have middle names with meaning - the names of my paternal grandparents who died before we were born. I love having that connection with people I'll never get to meet who had such a huge influence on my father.  So maybe that's why I'm so into it?
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  • image TysMomPlusOne:
    I completely agree, to the point that I am guilty of going on rants about it on this board after seeing one to many _____ Grace(s). I got flamed for telling people to pick something of significance even if it sounded silly (I think I used a favorite colour as a example).

    Yes

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  • image magsugar13:

    I honestly dont think it matters. If it has great meaning thats fine, but if it is a name your parents just loved why not?

    I agree.  I find it strange when someone agonizes over finding a middle name with meaning but uses a first name simply because they like the way it sounds.  Or, as someone else mentioned, using the name of a relative they never even know... simply because it's a family name. 

    We may or may not use a family name as a middle name... but it's not something we're going out of our way to do unless it's someone we *really* want to honor.

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  • image 718gemini:
    image magsugar13:

    I honestly dont think it matters. If it has great meaning thats fine, but if it is a name your parents just loved why not?

    I agree.  I find it strange when someone agonizes over finding a middle name with meaning but uses a first name simply because they like the way it sounds.  Or, as someone else mentioned, using the name of a relative they never even know... simply because it's a family name. 

    We may or may not use a family name as a middle name... but it's not something we're going out of our way to do unless it's someone we *really* want to honor.

    I agree with this too.  While we may end up using a family name for either the FN or MN, we haven't gone out of our way to make sure we use a name to honor someone, it's mostly a coincidence we liked the name.  Maybe it's because neither my H or I are extremely close to our families so it's not a must for us, who knows.  I would rather use a name I liked over a family name I didn't like just for the sake of using the family name. 

     

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  • What about one's own middle name though? 

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  • image ashleyaugust7:

    What about one's own middle name though? 

    Like using my own middle name for my daughter?  I would use it if I thought it sounded good with the fn, but again, I wouldn't go out of my way to use it just for the sake of using a "family name". 

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  • I feel this way about middle names:

    • The middle name shouldn't just be a filler like Marie, Anne, Mae, etc. unless that name actually has meaning (see below)
    • It could be used to honor a family member or close friend
    • It could be used to honor the place/ day where the baby was conceived or born (we may go with this one since the baby was conceived on our 1st anniversary in Hawaii)
    • It can be a way to honor your culture (my Chinese-Canadian friends used a Chinese middle name to honor the culture of their daughters)
    • It can be any ol' name as long as the same meaning means something to you (my niece was given Eve as a mn because the parents wanted something that lent meaning to a strong woman/ goddess and she was born at night)
  • image ReniaB:
    image ashleyaugust7:

    I really like when middle names have a special meaning.  I feel like that gives purpose to a middle name (and I don't mind the idea of no middle name either). Whether it be the parent's middle name, a family name, a significant place, etc.  I don't personally understand giving a middle name just for the sound of it, or because it is another name the parent likes- that is for the first name IMO.

    Obviously JMO, and people can name their kids whatever they damn well please :)

     

    I agree 100%.    

    I don't get the posts asking for middle names that "go with" a certain name.    

    I totally agree with both of these points. I also think FNs should have some significance. My family's/culture's tradition is to name a baby after a deceased loved one, but usually just by using the same first initial. My sister's and my names are based on family members, and all of our children are as well. I really don't like when people explain their name choice as, "oh I just really like it". There's no story or connection there. I also don't understand why the FN and MN have to "flow". The two names are never used together.

    I have a thing with MNs though, where I don't even see the need for one. If it were up to just me I wouldn't have given my kids MNs. There's no reason or purpose for them. My DH didn't go for that though, and I'm sure it would have caused drama at the DMV when they go for their drivers licenses, so I basically let him choose the MNs cause it wasn't that important to me. My significance is taken care of with the FNs.

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