Was your ex very angry at the end of your relationship?

dmndsr4eva

I am completely baffled at all the anger and insults coming my way.  My STBX has not spoken a normal word to me in 5 weeks.  The few times he opens his mouthg around me it is to say how dispicable I am.  If he wants to break up fine, but why all of this anger.  I didn't cheat on him or do anything that I see was so mean to him for me to deserve to be treated this way. 

We haven't even started discussing custody arrangements and he is already treating me like his worst enemy.  I am fearing for what he will turn into during custody mediation, etc.

mdotm0904

i could've written this word for word. the first few months after the breakup with my ex bf were very tense. he didn't feel as though the relationship should have ended without me letting him know beforehand that i wanted "out" & he felt "blindsided" (even though throughout our entire relationship he kept telling people we were just friends & he'd tell me how he & I could never be married but even after he gets married to someone else in the future, we'll still be "great friends") anyway, i made things "easy" for him & walked away (i also didn't cheat or lie to him or anything, i was just done with the relationship). so whenever he'd talk to me or I'd try to talk to him about the baby he'd tell me how selfish & ungrateful i was, that i never really cared about him or he'd still try to convince me to do sexual favors for him, etc. I

i watched him go through a nasty custody battle with his soon to be ex wife and he's a very spiteful and vindictive person. so unfortunately i'm aware that this could be a possibility between us as well when our baby is born in a few weeks.

all i can say is, i'm sorry your ex is treating you this way. all i can think of is that it's male ego and since he's "hurting" he's trying to hurt you as well by acting like an a$$ towards you. i don't have much advice on how else to deal with him, i know the ladies on this board will though, they seem to be a knowledgable & supportive bunch that can tell you your next steps.

detroitblondie

I've only been to a therapist a handful of times (with my ex) and it was mainly because he had anger issues and was emotionally abusive.   What I learned was that anger is a byproduct of fear and fear is irrational.  He's being nasty to you as a coping mechanism.  Although that really sucks.  I hope he gets a grip before things get out of hand.  Hugs, chica!