Attachment Parenting

possible to stay ap while pregnant and having another little one?

When you got pregnant with #2 did you stop bedsharing, babywearing, breastfeeding?  Not that this would make someone non-ap so maybe my title is not the best.

 I know you don't have to stop doing these things while pregnant, but I imagine that lo #1 could kick tummy while bedsharing and make it uncomfortable as you get larger.  I know that moms with older children still hold them while pregnant, but is babywearing difficult or dangerous while pregnant?  I am so so so confused about ttc#2

Re: possible to stay ap while pregnant and having another little one?

  • BFab11BFab11
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    Your body will tell you when it's time to stop babywearing.  I can still have C in a high back carry with ruck straps that don't tie over my stomach.  If you're comfortable, it's ok.

    I'm still BFing and bedsharing.  Unless C self weans when my milk changes or my supply drops, I'll probably be tandem nursing.  We're trying to transition him to his own room, mainly because sleeping around a toddler is getting uncomfortable, and it's only going to get worse as I get bigger.   If they kick you, baby is very well protected so it's not dangerous, it'll just be uncomfortable, lol.  

    So yes, you can still be AP and do AP-associated things while pregnant, you just have to go with the flow and do what's right for your family as things change. 

  • We are also still bf and bed-sharing. I can't wear Ella simply because I don't have the extender for my Ergo so I don't have enough belt to go under my expanding belly.

    We started moving Ella to her own bed (a full size floor bed) when we moved into our new home 3 months ago. She comes into our bed at some point during the night.

    We have night weaned simply because while I'm fine with tandem nursing, I don't want to be night nursing two. 

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  • We had already transitioned my son mostly to his own room before getting pregnant but for other reasons. He does tend to come to our bed in the mornings and it's uncomfortable but mostly because he's wiggly, not because I'm pregnant.

    We had stopped most babywearing anyway since he started walking and isn't into it anymore but I still carry him around and he's up and down a lot. It's a workout and I'm definitely more tired than I was before so that's not ideal. I have worn him in the Ergo for short periods of time and it still works but I'm not that big yet. 

    We are still breastfeeding just fine and plan to continue doing so for as long as he wants, though I'm secretly hoping that he'll self wean at least a month or so before the new one comes, but I'm fine with whatever he decides.

    I can't think of any other AP things at the moment but I guess my point is that my parenting has evolved anyway as my son has gotten older and his needs have changed. These changes have been helpful to managing a toddler and a pregnancy. 

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  • Possible for me. I was unable to BF, but we stil bedshare with my oldest (we would with the baby, but she hated it so she sleeps in a crib) and I was wearing my oldest in a back carry at 8 months pregnant. Its definitely possible.

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  • We bedshared until 2 months before the baby was born (so DD was 12 months when she moved to her crib). I wore her a few times in the 1st and 2nd tri but she never liked being worn anyway. We breastfed throughout pregnancy and continue to breastfeed now.
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  • DD has been in a toddler bed for months, but we did bedshare on a recent vacation.  She is still nursing- twice a day.  When she wants to be worn, she will bring a carrier to me and say "wrap".  I find a high back carry in a mei-tai to be the most comfortable for me right now. 
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  • As of now we're still part-time bedsharing, wearing, and nursing.  I'd at least like DS to be night weaned and DH settle-able before new LO, have no intention to give up wearing unless it becomes an issue down the road, and wouldn't mind if weaning happened but I don't imagine it will and I don't feel the need to push hard.
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  • I was no longer babywearing or BFing when I got pregnant, but we continued to bedshare at least part of the night until delivery (and our son still comes into our bed at night some nights, otherwise DH gets in his bed with him if he wakes up and needs us). I couldn't pick him up much because of being high risk and on modified bedrest/pelvic rest but we still responded to his needs and did everything else I considered AP regardless of the "rules".
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  • I had to stop BFing to get pg (weaned at 17mo), and for us that meant ending bedsharing as well (because no way was DD going to STTN while snuggled up to the all-night buffet!)

    She was 19mo when I got pg and had only been walking a few months, so I did wear her in a ring sling at times. Towards the end I couldn't because it just felt like there was no room and no way was comfortable, but she was over 2yo at that point.

    But yes, I still feel that I was/am practicing AP with her. She is certainly no less attached to me because she sleeps in her own bed. And if she cries out, I still respond to her (though those times are fortunately rare at her age!) When DS was little, DH had to do more like responding to DD at night (she still woke up quite a bit back then).

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  • I still BF and bedshare with LO who is 17 months and I'm 10 weeks pregnant.

    I'm not BW at the moment because of the morning sickness.

    Bedsharing is making the morning sickness easier to deal with in the middle of the night. If I had to get up to LO if she woke, I would vomit. With her in the bed, I can just snuggle her.

    However, we do intend to transition her back to her own bed (she was sleeping in her own bed before she had a stint in the hospital) before Lo is born. I don't want her to feel like she's been dumped. 

     

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  • I stopped baby-wearing quite a while ago because I have back problems and DS was too heavy for me. I think I only wore him for a year.

    We are still bedsharing for now, but plan to move him to his own room and bed before the baby gets here. I do feel bad about it, like I am kicking him out and replacing him with the baby, but as long as he starts the night out in his own bed he is always welcome to join us in our bedroom. We are also getting him a real bed rather than a toddler bed, so one of us would be able to continue to bedshare with him in his room on occasion if he is sick, lonely, or otherwise needs us.

    As for breastfeeding, I stopped pretty much as soon as I found out I was PG. My boobs were KILLING me, and it was just time. I had been trying unsuccessfully to wean him for awhile, though, so at 18 months I just pulled the plug cold turkey.

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  • I can only answer regarding the babywearing portion of it.  But I wore DS until the 9th month.  He was 20 months at the time.  I think it's important to have a good, supportive carrier though, so you won't hurt your body.  I was using a toddler kinderpack and a toddler sized Ocah mei tai at the time. 
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  • I am no longer breastfeeding or wearing my son, but we still co-sleep part-time. He starts off in his own bed and then comes in with us in the middle of the night. However, we did recently put a little mattress on our floor for him to sleep next to us rather than in our bed. I was getting uncomfortable and big and I want him out of the bed before baby comes since he/she will be in there. It would be too crowded and unsafe with all of us in a little queen size bed. =) 
  • There were 4 of us in our bed last night.  That is all.
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