So, we're getting geared up to move back to the US after three years in Germany. We'll be arriving mid-August and will be buying a home, and waiting about two months for our household goods, and car, living in a hotel with a 10-month old and two grumpy cats out of a handful of suitcases.
I am beyond stressed about how complicated a move like this is (getting new driver's licenses, in-processing with the new unit, getting registered for health insurance, getting cell phones, making friends, expecting some reverse-cultrure shock, etc....)
MIL asks us in passing a few weeks ago if we'll make it home for Grandpa's birthday in August, we both say how sad we are, but it's just not possible. Fast forward a few weeks, she sends out an email to the whole family announcing her desire for a big bash in the first week of September.
DH and I talk about it, and we just can't commit, most likely we'll still be living in a hotel, and wont have closed on our home completely by then. We'd rather not fly across the country (Maryland to Oregon) three weeks after a huge move like this, let alone who the f is going to watch the cats, we can't be guaranteed we'll be done with the house-stuff, and it just seems WAY too stressful to do another trip like that anyway.
I call her, she laughs, and says "we should move faster on the house, there's no way it will take more than three weeks." And "Just drop the cats off at a kennel, it will only be for a few days." So, she wants us to take a bus or cab with the two cats to drop them at a kennel to fly cross country for a two day trip?
GAH! I tell her we just can't commit to it, but of course we'd love to be there, but we just don't know what our lives are going to look like at that point. She then sends another email to the whole family saying we wont be able to come because "we're moving with cats." And explains her other son and wife will make it even though they're also moving AND will have a newborn. B!!tch. They're moving across the flippin street!
So, I'm livid she's making us feel guilty for this. We'd rather go for a visit when everything is settled, and we can enjoy ourselves and stay for longer. But, be honest, am I making this a bigger issue, will a trip at that point not be as stressful as it feels right now? WWYD?