TTC after 35

It's over

After a long and tearful discussion, our TTC journey has come to an end.  I was given the wrong test results in regards to my husband's sperm analysis.  As it turns out, he has a zero sperm count.  My husband and I have talked about it at length and have decided that donor sperm just isn't an option for us so this marks the end of our very short TTC experience. 

I wish all of you the very best of luck and I hope all of you wonderful women get your BFP's very soon.

Thanks again for all of the information.

-- Shannon

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Re: It's over

  • aglennaglenn
    Ancient Membership 2500 Comments 250 Love Its Combo Breaker
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    So sorry to hear that!  Hugs to you.
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  • Shannon,

    I am so sorry to hear this. I am sure you will be sad for a while - there is always a necessary grieving time.  I just wanted to suggest you put something in the back of your mind for later (if you wish) - there are many ways to make a family.  Of course, some people don't want to go the non-traditional route, and this is a personal choice. But here in S.F., I would say half of all families are not the "traditional" ones, and they are as loved and loveable as any other family. 

    Also, you may want to check in with the "Azoospermia" check-in on the Infertility boards. I've lurked over there when awaiting our semen analysis, and those ladies accomplish some amazing things. Have you looked into meds to treat this condition?

    Most of all I just want to wish you the best and to take good care of yourself during this hard time. 

    ttc since 2/2010 ~
    me (36): Hypothyroid (on Levothroid), low vit. d, borderline/high fsh (day 3: between 7-10) (day 10: 13 during CCCT), AFC: 14
    dh (31): awesome (minus one sample with agglutination)
    Diagnosis:possible DOR and/or unexplained + elevated NK cells + MTHFR (C677T - one copy)

    MAY 2011 - FEB 2012 - 3 injectable IUI's with numerous cancellations due to high TSH levels
    MAY 2012 - onto IVF/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol) on BCP and Folgard (3 week delay - cyst - boooo) 5/21 start stims 5/30 ER 11R 8M 3F 6/2 3DT of 3 6/12 Beta #1 83 | 6/14 Beta #2 196 | 6/21 Beta #3 3818 | 6/28 Beta #4 22,213 | 7/2 1st U/S - 2 on board! 8/24 CVS reveals that we have a boy AND a girl on board!

    Healthy baby boy and girl born in February, 2013 at 38 weeks and 2 days!


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  • I'm so sorry to hear that. I wish you the best of luck.
  • Wow Im sorry, but remember when one door closes, another opens, I hope life takes you in a new direction!
  • ((Hugs))
    TTC since Oct 2008 Me =43, DH =45 Dx = Intermittant Ovarian Failure, High FSH, DOR Pursuing DE since Oct 2010 PAIF/SAIF welcome. DE IVF 12/10/11, we transferred 2 embryos on day 3, 1 grade A 8 cell and 1 grade A 4 cell. 1st Beta = 890 on 12/23/11. 2nd beta = 10,967 on 12/28/11. 1st U/S 1/11/12 TWINS! Both with 139 hb.

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  • You have all my sympathy, and of course you should make the decision that feels right for you.  But like solarflare above, I just want to plant another seed, just in case.  Even though I don't know what your reasons are for not wanting to use donor sperm, I can kind of understand because I am uncomfortable with donor eggs -- not just the expense, but also because I just don't like the idea of looking at a future child and wondering what is my husband, what's the donor, and what's, well, not me.  Weirdly enough, though, I find I'm kind of ok with the idea of donor embryos, with which I would get to be pregnant with my adopted child who is genetically related neither to me nor to my husband.  I don't know if that makes sense, but it's something my DH and I are contemplating if our IVF cycle doesn't work.  (It's also far cheaper than either donor eggs or actual adoption).

    However, if you've made a decision you want to stick with, of course that's what you need to do, without listening to any of us who haven't taken your courageous step chattering at you.

    me - 41 (dx: DOR); DH - 53 (no problems); 7/18/09 - married!; 8/4/09 - BFP on first (real)try; 9/14/09 - missed m/c; 9/15/09 - d&c; 11/09 - 3/10 - 4 natural cycles = BFN; 4/10 - dx hyperthyroidism caused by Graves' disease; 6/10 - thyroidectomy; 7/10 - 12/10 - 1 natural and 5 medicated IUI cycles = BFN; 1/11 - new RE; dx low ovarian reserve (AMH .42; 1/26/11 -- BFP (ectopic) from IUI #6; methotrexate 2/10/11; 6/2/11 - IVF #1 = BFN; 9/12/11 - prescreening for DE; 9/15/11 - IUI #7 (unmedicated)= BFN; 11/8 - begin DE cycle (shared risk program); 12/5 - ER (5 eggs/4 mature/3 fertilized/2 left by day 5) 12/10 - ET of one 1BB blast (expanded, "fair" quality), none to freeze; 12/22 - totally shocked by +hpt; beta #1 = 413; #2 = 3952 2/14 - CVS reveals a healthy baby girl! EDD: 8/27/12 DD born 8/31/12, 10 lbs 10 oz and perfect in every way. 
  • I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you and YH are able to work through the grieving and sense of loss, and feel totally comfotable with where you are and will be. Best of luck to you... and you are still totally welcome here if you want to post, vent, etc.
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  • hijoihijoi
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 250 Answers 500 Love Its
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    I am so very sorry.
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  • I'm at a loss for words.  So sorry to hear, but it's nice that you and DH seem to be on same page with where to go from here.  Good luck whereever your journey takes you.
    TTC since 10/09 Me-43 DH-44 RE and testing 10/10-11/10, Recommending IVF 1/11 New RE AMA and DOR-DH low motility IVF #1.1 cancelled 3/11 due to poor response IVF #1.2 May 2011, one perfect 8-cell embryo, 3dt-BFN, IVF #2.1 Converted to IUI d/t poor response. New RE 9/2011. IVF 2.2 completed using HGH,EPP,DHEA, Q-10 and accupuncture. Transferred one 8-cell, grade one embryo on 10/19. BFP 10/31/11 Chemical pregancy on 11/2/11. Started stims for IVF #3, our final try, on 12-2-11. ET on 12/18. Transferred 3 Grade A embryos-BFFN Planning DE IVF, late March/early April- Donors ER expected to be 4/2-4/4. PAIF/SAIF welcome
  • Sorry...life is truely unfair!
    TTC since 2009 very frustrated 42yr and DH 40

    5 cycles of Clomid with satisfactory response=BFN's
    Fibroid removal Nov2010
    IUI Clomid #1 Feb 2011...BFN..damn it!
    IUI Inject's #2 Apr 2011...CANCELLED...low estradiol
    IUI Inject's #3 June 2011...BFN
    IUI Inject's #4 Sept2011...BFFN
    Lap Dec 2011...severe endo..cyst removed..some remains...
    IVF#1 Apr 2012 ....cancelled due to over suppression
    IVF#2 July 2012....6 follies...only 1 retrieved....BFFN
    surgery suggested to move ovary to an better placement but....we moved two time zones away and are financially and emotionally empty

  • I am so sorry.
    TTC our 1st LO since September 2009
    History of ENDO and ovarian cysts, currently have 1 Myoma on left ovary - but it's shrinking, yea! Clomid 100mg since Jan 2011, trigger 4/5, 1st IUI 4/7, 1 mature follie, progesterone = BFN
    SHG 5/2 = all clear
    IUI#2 on Mother's Day 5/8, no trigger, 2 mature follies, progesterone = BFN
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  • I am so very sorry to hear this. I know this must have been a difficult decision. Take the time to grieve properly and then see how you feel. Maybe you will stick with your decision, maybe you will one day start looking at other options. Just keep an open mind and an open heart.

    I'm a single-mom-to-be and before I ever started down this journey I had to take the time to grieve the loss of having a child with a a husband in a loving marriage. It was tough, but going through it made it easier for me to open my heart to other options.

    Best of luck to you!

    Single Mother by Choice. Life didn't work out the way I planned so I did it on my own. IUI #s 1-3, unmedicated = BFN, IUI #s 4-6, 50mg Clomid, Ovidrel = BFN IVF #1: 23R, 20M, 17F. 5 day transfer 2 blasts. 2 Snowbabies BFP 6dp5dt, Beta #1 7dp5dt = 58, Beta #2 9dp5dt = 114, Beta #3 10dp5dt = 187 1st Ultrasound = 5/3, not much to see yet. 2nd Ultrasound = 5/17, TWINS!!! Hospital Bed Rest at 32 weeks due to pre-ecclampsia and severe edema. Audrey Grace, 5lbs9oz, & Lydia Louise, 6lbs, born via emergency c-section on 12/6/12 at 36w1d My IVF Journey
  • Not sure if you have heard this or explored it, but I read someone's post yesterday on TTTC about how her husband has 0 sperm. After several months of HIM taking Clomid they increased the sperm to over 45million. Sounds like there may be options to explore. MFI isn't as well known but there is lot of information out there if you so choose. Best of luck to you!
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  • I'm very sorry.

    TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
    DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
    5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
    OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
    DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
    DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
    CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
    DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

    DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
    First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! EDD 12/2/14

    MFM will induce or schedule C/S by week 37-38= 11/12/14 to 11/19/14
    We are Team Pink x 2!!!

    imageimage

    SAIF/PAIF Welcome


    http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

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  • I am so very sorry.
    TTC #1 since 2/10 Me 38 FSH 12.9 & AMH 0.16 DH 47, low sperm count due to meds. 07/11 We have sperm! 28 million, 70% motility, morphology 1% normal. 08/14/11 1st IUI unmedicated BFN. 09/11/11 2nd IUI w/ Femara + trigger BFN 10/14/11 trigger & Final IUI 10/16/11 BFN 10/21/11 Started acupuncture and loving it! 01/21 ET one embryo 6 cell grade C. Beta 02/02. BFN. Taking a much needed break. image
  • I don't have the words to tell you how sorry I am.
    BFP on IVF #2 6/29/2012. Beta #1 7/3 = 522; Beta #2 = 1180; Beta #3 = 6491 image BabyFruit Ticker
  • image ForTheLoveOf Pink:
    Sorry...life is truely unfair!

    Totally agree with this...sending you lots of love...hoping that you will be able to find some comfort and also another resolution to the situation...xo

  • I'm so sorry to hear this. I wish you and your husband the best.
    Me = 38, Husband = 31. TTC since 1/10. M/C at 8 wks 5/10. Started trying again 9/10. All tests normal: AMH/MIS, FSH, HSG, SA. Estradoil high. 6/20/11 - Clomid+Ovidrel+IUI#1=BFN. 7/17/11 - Clomid+IUI#2=BFN. 2 natural cycles = BFN. 10/6/11 - Clomid+Ovidrel+IUI#3=BFN. 10/31/11 - Clomid+Ovidrel+IUI#4 = BFN. 11/26/11 - Follistim+Ovidrel+IUI#5 = BFN. IVF#1 - Menopur+Follistim. 2 ET 5/11/12 = BFN.
  • (((Hugs)))  I'm so sorry!!
    Me: 38, DH 40 TTC #1 since 8/09 CP 10/09.
    3/11 Clomid-Ovidrel-IUI #1-progesterone= BFN.
    5/11 Femara-Bravelle-Ovidrel-IUI#2-progesterone=BFN.
    6/11 Femara-Ovidrel-IUI#3-progesterone=BFP!
    Beta #1 7/1: 39. Beta #2 7/5: 301 U/S 7/19 - saw HB!!
    EDD 3/12/12
    DD born 3/5/12
  • I am so sorry!!!!  ((hugs))
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    The newest member of our family! Austin - age 4

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    Deeno - Our oldest child :)

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    Lily - Our second oldest child :)

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    Married 07/04/10 - Me 40 & DH 46 - Tried conceiving for 2 1/2 years, including IUI, but no luck. Were about to do IVF at the end of 2012, but my body started shutting down. Made the decision to have a hysterectomy in January 2013. Met an amazing little boy in July 2012 that needed a family & decided to move forward with adopting him. He has made our family complete & we are happier than we ever thought that we could be!
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