Does anyone else feel like they are still making the transition into motherhood? It's been barely 5 weeks here and I'm feeling rather anxious this week. Part of it is due to my husband traveling for work so it being just me caring for the baby all day long by myself with no break unless she's napping...it's lonely during the day with just me and a baby and I really look fwd to when he comes home at the end of the day. I have a friend coming over tonight and lunch plans tomorrow, which helps, but it's still very monotonous caring for an infant.
I also can't help but think about how much life changed with a baby. Everything became much more difficult (from running simple errands to planning a vacation - DH wants to go out of the country next summer and have his parents come watch the baby but I feel like I can't get excited about it yet because we need to depend on other people to make the trip happen. As in, we can't go w/o childcare arranged.) Even something as simple as going to test drive cars - we're planning to trade my car in for a SUV - requires someone to watch the baby and in my other post asking about what kind of help people have, I mentioned we don't really have too many optons for people to watch the baby...
Guess I'm just struggling a bit still with the transition from life being relatively uncomplicated (oh, sure, I can just pick up and dash off for a quick Target run with no problem!) to way more complicated (when did the baby last eat? Do I risk taking a sleeping baby on an errand and waking her up putting her in the car seat? And so on...)
I feel like there's so much you trade in when becoming a Mama and I know there are so many rewards, as well, but it's hard to see a lot of them when you're consumed with endless diaper changes & feeding schedule at this point and baby isn't really interactive much now. I don't mean to sound ungrateful for having a healthy, generally happy little girl, either. Please don't take it that way - I'm not looking to get flamed! I'm just having a tough time emotionally transitioning to this concept of being someone's mother...and hoping I'm not alone.
Big Sister - April 2011
Little Brother - June 2013