3rd Trimester

Brother in Law Stealing my attention!

I know this sounds sad and pathetic but I am so jealous of my 20yr old brother in law who has been staying the weekend with my hubby and I. I know it is just hormones and because I have a stupid cold but my husband has been working 50-60 hour weeks and he does the grave yard shift so he sleeps during the day when I am up. but his baby bro is on leave before he ship's out to iraq (He is a marine). hubby is like a father to lil bro helped raise him and could be the last time he sees his bro ... so my jealousy is uncalled for I know .... I just would really like some one on one time with him before our LO arrives in the next 3 weeks!

Realistically I know my hubby loves me and would shower me with attention but I am so jealous that hubby took off 2 days to be with his bro. 

Re: Brother in Law Stealing my attention!

  • i'm sorry you're feeling left out...but your brother is law is going to Iraq...if any of my siblings were going to war, i would take all the time off that i needed to spend extra time with them.  i'm sure it's just your hormones in over drive, but try to put yourself in your DH's shoes (and your BIL's shoes).
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  • Hey at least you're aware you're acting like a crazy person.

    Being pregnant is really no excuse when it comes to something this serious. Let your DH be with his brother and don't give him grief about it. He'll be around for you and LO plenty after his brother leaves, give him this time.

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  • Ummm, Indifferent.  Yeah.

    You're pregnant!  Not going off to war and like you said possibly not coming back alive.

    You sound extremely immature!

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  • image Epiphany27:

    Hey at least you're aware you're acting like a crazy person.

    Being pregnant is really no excuse when it comes to something this serious. Let your DH be with his brother and don't give him grief about it. He'll be around for you and LO plenty after his brother leaves, give him this time.

    This. You should really just get over it (and enjoy some time with your BIL. He's your family too and he's going to a war zone for crying out loud)
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  • image futuremrscrocco:

    Ummm, Indifferent.  Yeah.

    You're pregnant!  Not going off to war and like you said possibly not coming back alive.

    You sound extremely immature!

    Wow, I just have to say. One, you do not know me, Two, I have not done a darn thing to keep my brother in law from my husband, Three, having a father who is a navy seal, another brother in law who is shipped off to Iraq and a sister in law who is just graduating officers school and have already lost two cousins to this war I am very offended by your gull to call me immature. I merely posted about my hormones.

    I live every damn day knowing my family is fighting for our country... and that I may never see them again. I live in fear of the phone call telling me my loved ones are dead. So please don't you dare call me immature because I am 36w pregnant and miss my husband who by the way has also  already served his country. 

  • image futuremrscrocco:

    Ummm, Indifferent.  Yeah.

    You're pregnant!  Not going off to war and like you said possibly not coming back alive.

    You sound extremely immature!

     

    You obviously didn't read her post.  Don't judge if you're just going to skim.  The woman flat out said she knows she's being irrational and petty and isn't acting on it.  Instead, she's venting here.

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  • image nsturm85:
    image futuremrscrocco:

    Ummm, Indifferent.? Yeah.

    You're pregnant!? Not going off to war and like you said possibly not coming back alive.

    You sound extremely immature!

    Wow, I just have to say. One, you do not know me, Two, I have not done a darn thing to keep my brother in law from my husband, Three, having a father who is a navy seal, another brother in law who is shipped off to Iraq and a sister in law who is just graduating officers school and have already lost two cousins to this war I am very offended by your gull to call me immature. I merely posted about my hormones.

    I live every damn day knowing my family is fighting for our country... and that I may never see them again. I live in fear of the phone call telling me my loved ones are dead. So please don't you dare call me immature because I am 36w pregnant and miss my husband who by the way has also ?already served his country.?

    Don't throw around who you know at war to prove a point, it does sound super immature. And stop using the fact that you're 36w pregnant as an excuse too. You're on a pregnancy board, don't expect sympathy. People who use being KTFU as an excuse make every other pregnant woman look bad.

    Vent away but you should also be prepared to deal with people rightfully calling you out.

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  • I get that you have the pregnancy hormones (as we all do) and that you know many people who are or have been on active duty and fought in the war.  That being said, you've had the last 36 weeks with your husband plus the next 3-4 weeks...all you're giving up is two days so that he can spend it with your BIL.  It sounds--whether you meant for it to or not--extremely selfish, and sorry, a tad immature.  Even the title of your post sounds a tad pathetic.  My husband works 70+hours during the week and then on the weekends--every weekend--he has to now spend finishing renovations on the house that have to get done before baby comes (like yesterday he spent the entire day tearing out all the sheetrock in the living room from 8am to 8pm and today he gets to wake up and hang new sheetrock, another all day job). Do I wish that instead he and I could spend all day together--absolutely. But I recognize that somethings are important than me and my attention.
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  • AbbneyAbbney
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
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    image nsturm85:
    image futuremrscrocco:

    Ummm, Indifferent.  Yeah.

    You're pregnant!  Not going off to war and like you said possibly not coming back alive.

    You sound extremely immature!

    Wow, I just have to say. One, you do not know me, Two, I have not done a darn thing to keep my brother in law from my husband, Three, having a father who is a navy seal, another brother in law who is shipped off to Iraq and a sister in law who is just graduating officers school and have already lost two cousins to this war I am very offended by your gull to call me immature. I merely posted about my hormones.

    I live every damn day knowing my family is fighting for our country... and that I may never see them again. I live in fear of the phone call telling me my loved ones are dead. So please don't you dare call me immature because I am 36w pregnant and miss my husband who by the way has also  already served his country. 

    Then why did you title this "BIL stealing my attention" and not "overly hormonal and missing my husband"?  I dont know what I am more irritated with,you geting pissy that your DH took two days off to see his baby brother that he helped raise before he deployed for the next 12 months? Or the fact that there are women out there (and you seem to be one) who cannot seem to function and whine and cry if their husbands are not by their side for more than 48 hours.

    Get over your hormones and hang out with your BIL and your H, be their DD, he is going to a place where the entire country HATES him WILL TRY TO KILL HIM and the most recent memories he will have to look back on when he is in the suck are going to be at your house. Why dont you stop and realize this may actually be the closest he will ever get to meeting his niece or nephew...If your family is THAT military this topic would have never even come up, and if your Navy Seal father heard you whine like this I am sure he would do worse damage than the ladies on this board.

    Put your big girl panties on, grow up and press on, and I say this as someone who has served for the past 14 years, and has a husband who has been in for 15 years and a BIL who is 12 years younger than DH who is going on his 3 tour in 5 years.

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  • I think you should put your "hormones" aside for 2 days and get over it.  Be thankful you have such wonderful family who serve our country, and maybe think about doing something to repay him/them instead of your own selfishness.  It's 2 days FFS.
  • Wow.

    It is kind of silly to get defensive when your realized in the first post how awful you sound. It is rare to come across someone as selfish as you seem to be on the bump. Your BIL is going off to fight for our country and your DH wants to slend some time with him. You are going to have DH for the rest of your lives together, grow the eff up.

    My god, don't you realize some people have real problems that they don't get this ridiculous over.

    And, please do not express to DH how you feel. If your vent did not go over well with internet strangers, it will go over even worse with him. Call a sympathetic friend that will take you out for ice cream and you can bask in her attention all you want.

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  • image Abbney:
    image nsturm85:
    image futuremrscrocco:

    Ummm, Indifferent.  Yeah.

    You're pregnant!  Not going off to war and like you said possibly not coming back alive.

    You sound extremely immature!

    Wow, I just have to say. One, you do not know me, Two, I have not done a darn thing to keep my brother in law from my husband, Three, having a father who is a navy seal, another brother in law who is shipped off to Iraq and a sister in law who is just graduating officers school and have already lost two cousins to this war I am very offended by your gull to call me immature. I merely posted about my hormones.

    I live every damn day knowing my family is fighting for our country... and that I may never see them again. I live in fear of the phone call telling me my loved ones are dead. So please don't you dare call me immature because I am 36w pregnant and miss my husband who by the way has also  already served his country. 

    Then why did you title this "BIL stealing my attention" and not "overly hormonal and missing my husband"?  I dont know what I am more irritated with,you geting pissy that your DH took two days off to see his baby brother that he helped raise before he deployed for the next 12 months? Or the fact that there are women out there (and you seem to be one) who cannot seem to function and whine and cry if their husbands are not by their side for more than 48 hours.

    Get over your hormones and hang out with your BIL and your H, be their DD, he is going to a place where the entire country HATES him WILL TRY TO KILL HIM and the most recent memories he will have to look back on when he is in the suck are going to be at your house. Why dont you stop and realize this may actually be the closest he will ever get to meeting his niece or nephew...If your family is THAT military this topic would have never even come up, and if your Navy Seal father heard you whine like this I am sure he would do worse damage than the ladies on this board.

    Put your big girl panties on, grow up and press on, and I say this as someone who has served for the past 14 years, and has a husband who has been in for 15 years and a BIL who is 12 years younger than DH who is going on his 3 tour in 5 years.

     

    YesYes 

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  • Hey, at least you have a husband who is a good man to spend this time with his brother and support you. I know you are just venting, but there are quite a few women out there who don't have half of what you do. Just maybe try to count your blessings instead of what you perceive to be unjust. 
  • AbbneyAbbney
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
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    AND FOR CRYING OUT LOUD  ITS MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND!!!! LOOK UP THE MEANING BEHIND IT...ITS NOT JUST A LONG WEEKEND

    I really hope this is mud, I am getting more and more disgusted the more I think about this

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  • image Abbney:
    image nsturm85:
    image futuremrscrocco:

    Ummm, Indifferent.  Yeah.

    You're pregnant!  Not going off to war and like you said possibly not coming back alive.

    You sound extremely immature!

    Wow, I just have to say. One, you do not know me, Two, I have not done a darn thing to keep my brother in law from my husband, Three, having a father who is a navy seal, another brother in law who is shipped off to Iraq and a sister in law who is just graduating officers school and have already lost two cousins to this war I am very offended by your gull to call me immature. I merely posted about my hormones.

    I live every damn day knowing my family is fighting for our country... and that I may never see them again. I live in fear of the phone call telling me my loved ones are dead. So please don't you dare call me immature because I am 36w pregnant and miss my husband who by the way has also  already served his country. 

    Then why did you title this "BIL stealing my attention" and not "overly hormonal and missing my husband"?  I dont know what I am more irritated with,you geting pissy that your DH took two days off to see his baby brother that he helped raise before he deployed for the next 12 months? Or the fact that there are women out there (and you seem to be one) who cannot seem to function and whine and cry if their husbands are not by their side for more than 48 hours.

    Get over your hormones and hang out with your BIL and your H, be their DD, he is going to a place where the entire country HATES him WILL TRY TO KILL HIM and the most recent memories he will have to look back on when he is in the suck are going to be at your house. Why dont you stop and realize this may actually be the closest he will ever get to meeting his niece or nephew...If your family is THAT military this topic would have never even come up, and if your Navy Seal father heard you whine like this I am sure he would do worse damage than the ladies on this board.

    LMAO. You clearly have no clue what is going on there these days. If it were Afghanistan, this would be true. Not some much for Iraq these days.

    They are pulling out of Iraq. DH's unit has been pulling KP duty for almost a year because there is literally nothing for the to do because the Iraqi Army has been in charge for a while and the US Army doesn't do anything unless asked to assist. They don't leave the base unless 100% necessary. It's the new Bosnia. Some threat, but a better chance of being killed from one of your buddies screwing up than because of an enemy attack.

    And yeah OP, I do agree with quit pulling out the "I have family members at war, so feel sorry for me". Most military spouses (and service members for that matter) want to smack the shiit out of ignorant family members like you. And I would venture a guess your dad would kick off the proceedings.

     

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    "People seem to couple an inordinate amount of stupidity with extreme laziness." ~ A wise interwebz friend.

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  • Wow, just wow ladies. This board is supposed to be a safe place where women support each other. She started by saying she KNOWS she was being sad and pathetic OK. This is the way she feels and she is entitled to it.

    Unless you are in her shoes, stop being mean and judgmental and remember she is a pregnant woman with hormones and what not, is probably exhausted, in pain, with all these emotions...

     Obviously we ALL know , including herself, that of course her hubby will be spending time with his lil bro and she needs to let him do so, come on....

    nsturm85, I hope you venting made you feel better. I know it does for me, even if some of the ladies on the board completely miss your point.

  • image P0upette:

    Wow, just wow ladies. This board is supposed to be a safe place where women support each other. She started by saying she KNOWS she was being sad and pathetic OK. This is the way she feels and she is entitled to it.

    Unless you are in her shoes, stop being mean and judgmental and remember she is a pregnant woman with hormones and what not, is probably exhausted, in pain, with all these emotions...

     Obviously we ALL know , including herself, that of course her hubby will be spending time with his lil bro and she needs to let him do so, come on....

    nsturm85, I hope you venting made you feel better. I know it does for me, even if some of the ladies on the board completely miss your point.

    Why didnt she post this on the military families board? im guessing because she knows she would get flamed like never before and hoped that this board would be better, its not.

    OP, Copernicus called, you are no longer the center of the universe.

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  • Um wow! I agree with what all PP have said. I would just say be glad your husband isn't in the service( cause he could be deployed when your child is born ) Selfishness. Thank your brother in law from us though! 
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