Ok, girls! I think I've explained the point I am trying to make. If you choose to interprete it differently, more power to you, but I have more important things to do, like construct my 9 months bubble and grow those pretty flowers you mentioned.
Try to be calm, most of you ARE growing a human being inside of you!
Gender is socially constructed? Are you crazy? Maybe you misunderstanding the terms. Sex is the genitalia, gender is the mental understanding of its own sex. I am not talking about gender RULES.
hey crazy pants, you're NOT RIGHT
do you think the World Health Organization is wrong?
"Sex" refers to the biological and physiological characteristics that define men and women.
"Gender" refers to the socially constructed roles, behaviours, activities, and attributes that a given society considers appropriate for men and women.
Ok, then what do you call how your perceive yourself? How your brain is wired? Fine, if you want to call it sex too, it's ok. But the point is the brain get wired a certain way for a boy and a different way for a girl. And that's the process I am talking about.
What you're referring to is not sexuality, who you find attractive, but gender, which is how you experience biological sex. So what you're worried about is that your child will be trans-gendered rather than homosexual?
I can promise you, there is NOTHING that you as a mother can do that would make your child transgendered.
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Gender is socially constructed? Are you crazy? Maybe you misunderstanding the terms. Sex is the genitalia, gender is the mental understanding of its own sex. I am not talking about gender RULES.
hey crazy pants, you're NOT RIGHT
do you think the World Health Organization is wrong?
"Sex" refers to the biological and physiological characteristics that define men and women.
"Gender" refers to the socially constructed roles, behaviours, activities, and attributes that a given society considers appropriate for men and women.
Ok, then what do you call how your perceive yourself? How your brain is wired? Fine, if you want to call it sex too, it's ok. But the point is the brain get wired a certain way for a boy and a different way for a girl. And that's the process I am talking about.
that my dear, I simply call "perception". I don't disagree that the male and female brains are wired differently, but to preach that something the mothers do while pregnant is causing their children to be homosexual is so out there, it's ridiculous.
I think you need to put down the "millions" of books you've read and maybe learn not to but so much weight on every single damn thing you've come across.
What you're referring to is not sexuality, who you find attractive, but gender, which is how you experience biological sex. So what you're worried about is that your child will be trans-gendered rather than homosexual?
I can promise you, there is NOTHING that you as a mother can do that would make your child transgendered.
It's not smth a mother would ever do subconciously. Just like miscarriages simply happen, just like fetuses have birth defect at no fault of the mother, this is the same thing. So the point is NOT how it happens or whether it's true or not, but that shouldn't we all do our best at doing everything possible to protect that fetus. So those studies must or must not be true. But do we want to take a chance? I don't. So I'll do what I can to reduce my stress during those nice months. That's all I am saying- stress reduction will only benefit the mother and the fetus.
I am in NO WAY suggesting that miscarriages or chemical pregnancies are a mother's fault ( except for those who exposed themselves to substances known to cause miscarriages and birth defects). I am simply stating that for my peace of mind I would like to avoid any kinds of situations that mind in any way influence the development of my baby. I realize there is a 25% chance of miscarriage and there's nothing that can done about that- mistakes in DNA just happen- it's no one's fault. So please, please, please, take this as a "this is how I chose to approach it", rather than feeling that you might not be doing enough. This is simply our choice, everyone does what works for them.
This is not exactly what you said in your blog, but it does sound slightly less crazy and judgmental, so good back-pedaling. I did NOT feel like I wasn't doing enough when I had my CP, though, that assumption on your part is completely wrong. I KNOW I didn't do anything wrong, and your insinuation in your original blog post that CPs are due to some "mistake" made by the mother is insulting, hurtful, and wrong.
TAOMAB:
Also, for those who don't know, gardening= toxoplasmosis if not wearing gloves.
Gardening == toxoplasmosis if not wearing gloves. Gardening where cats poop and not wearing gloves and not washing your hands and then putting your hands in your mouth COULD transmit toxoplasmosis. But hey, if you want to avoid gardening and dirt and your friends for 9 months, go right ahead.
TAOMAB:
You know, I would think that this, being a community of pregnant women and mothers, would show some respect to other mothers and women by using polite language and giving people the benefit of a doubt. IF this is how you're behaving towards other women, then I don't know what kind mothers you are.
Oh goody, the "you must all be horrible mothers because you were rude to me" line! Now this thread is complete.
TAOMAB:
I've had a few women simply tell me that they disagree with me, at which point I'd correct them explaining that they misunderstood what i was trying to say. That's how normal people behave.
LOL, so any time anyone disagrees with you they are actually WRONG and you "correct" them! Aren't you a smarty pants!
TAOMAB:
Since when do we ridicule other people's healthy choices? ...oh wait, since always, because that makes us feel inadequate.
Your "healthy choices" don't make me feel inadequate, they make me feel sane. So thanks for that.
TAOMAB:
And for that "nice" person who inquired whether this causes me negative feelings- no it doesn't- all it does is bring traffic to my blog, so thank you.
You're welcome, I hope it brings many people as much entertainment as it's brought me.
This is not exactly what you said in your blog, but it does sound slightly less crazy and judgmental, so good back-pedaling. I did NOT feel like I wasn't doing enough when I had my CP, though, that assumption on your part is completely wrong. I KNOW I didn't do anything wrong, and your insinuation in your original blog post that CPs are due to some "mistake" made by the mother is insulting, hurtful, and wrong.
Hey, no back pedaling there. Why would I say that CP or M/C are a mother's fault if I am myself not out of the woods for each one of them? Come on! Everyone who's ever been pregnant is dealthy afraid of either one of them, including me. I am simply doing what I can and think is right to possibly minimize those chances if that's how it works.
This is not exactly what you said in your blog, but it does sound slightly less crazy and judgmental, so good back-pedaling. I did NOT feel like I wasn't doing enough when I had my CP, though, that assumption on your part is completely wrong. I KNOW I didn't do anything wrong, and your insinuation in your original blog post that CPs are due to some "mistake" made by the mother is insulting, hurtful, and wrong.
Hey, no back pedaling there. Why would I say that CP or M/C are a mother's fault if I am myself not out of the woods for each one of them? Come on! Everyone who's ever been pregnant is dealthy afraid of either one of them, including me. I am simply doing what I can and think is right to possibly minimize those chances if that's how it works.
Oh, you want me to quote you? Ok:
"Pregnant woman?s immune system is suppressed from the very start and so
many illnesses can be very harmful to the fetus from the first day of
conception that it was very clear to us that if we were to approach the
actual pregnancy in the same manner we did the preparations for it, then
we need to keep me home for the whole 9 months. ... Growing a baby is such an intricate process, so many things can go wrong
under the influence of seemingly harmless external factors. When the
baby is very small, those mistakes in development can result in a
miscarriage or a chemical pregnancy*."
Here's my interpretation: exposure to external factors = mother's mistake = M/C or CP. Many other people interpreted it this way too. So I think maybe you need to edit your blog post if you really meant it the way you corrected yourself here.
Lurker from TTGP here...I can't hold it in anymore! Lady, you are what is wrong with society today. You are a veiled homophobe. You claim to "have gay friends and love them to death" yet you, at every turn, compare being gay to a disease or a syndrome like ADD. It's pathetic. If you "love" gay people sooo much and think there is nothing wrong with it, why would you do everything in your power to stop your child from being gay? Not to mention your ideas of what makes people gay are completely assinine. You are the type of person who should NOT be procreating. Get a fish or a cat and call it good. You are pathetic. ::vom::
TTC #1 since April '11.- BFP 7/3/11! - EDD 3/13/12 - Dean born 3/15/12! - Lovely Labor Buddies with PsychGirl33!! </br>
This is not exactly what you said in your blog, but it does sound slightly less crazy and judgmental, so good back-pedaling. I did NOT feel like I wasn't doing enough when I had my CP, though, that assumption on your part is completely wrong. I KNOW I didn't do anything wrong, and your insinuation in your original blog post that CPs are due to some "mistake" made by the mother is insulting, hurtful, and wrong.
Hey, no back pedaling there. Why would I say that CP or M/C are a mother's fault if I am myself not out of the woods for each one of them? Come on! Everyone who's ever been pregnant is dealthy afraid of either one of them, including me. I am simply doing what I can and think is right to possibly minimize those chances if that's how it works.
Oh, you want me to quote you? Ok:
"Pregnant woman?s immune system is suppressed from the very start and so many illnesses can be very harmful to the fetus from the first day of conception that it was very clear to us that if we were to approach the actual pregnancy in the same manner we did the preparations for it, then we need to keep me home for the whole 9 months. ... Growing a baby is such an intricate process, so many things can go wrong under the influence of seemingly harmless external factors. When the baby is very small, those mistakes in development can result in a miscarriage or a chemical pregnancy*."
Here's my interpretation: exposure to external factors = mother's mistake = M/C or CP. Many other people interpreted it this way too. So I think maybe you need to edit your blog post if you really meant it the way you corrected yourself here.
I guess for me the key word was "CAN RESULT".
Actually, I don't think I was even talking about CP, because those happen sooo early in the process that it's hard to do anything right or wrong to prevent or cause them, it's not up to us, and because of that, the second I found out I was pregnant, the thought of a CP hasn't left my mind.
If we talking about miscarriages, can they be cause by external factors? Yes! Do they all happen as a result of external factors? HELL NO!
And i guess that's what concerns me the most. That we DO NOT have a lot of say in the matter. So in my mind if I do what I can to protect myself from anything and everything can could possibly cause a problem, then I know that if a miscarraige happens I've done everything I could and there was nothing to be done. That's something that would make me personally feel better.
So you guys jumped all over the post thinking it was written about you, while it was simply written about my feelings about my pregnancy, about what would make ME be ok with whatever issues I come across during pregnancy.
As far as correcting the post, I wrote it the way I explained it here, and I am sorry that some people took it as a personal offense, but it was written for me about me and my feelings. So intead of me putting a thousand explainations into every post I write on my PERSONAL blog, maybe you all need to lighten up and realize that we, pregnant women, have the same worries and the same hopes, we all just do different things about it.
Wow, so I guess flying to San Diego when I was 6 weeks PG caused my miscarriage.
You are incredibly misinformed and the fact that you continue to spout off information you believe to be true even after being corrected makes you appear to be even more idiotic.
PCOS and Hypothyroidism- Successful IUI's- May 2012 and October 2014. Miscarriage @ 6w3d in December 2009.
Lurker from TTGP here...I can't hold it in anymore! Lady, you are what is wrong with society today. You are a veiled homophobe. You claim to "have gay friends and love them to death" yet you, at every turn, compare being gay to a disease or a syndrome like ADD. It's pathetic. If you "love" gay people sooo much and think there is nothing wrong with it, why would you do everything in your power to stop your child from being gay? Not to mention your ideas of what makes people gay are completely assinine. You are the type of person who should NOT be procreating. Get a fish or a cat and call it good. You are pathetic. ::vom::
Ok, I have to reply to you, because you can't be further from the truth. As I wrote in the post, I'd be completely ok with my child being gay. Some of the best most creative people I've met have been gay or transexual. But I also know how much heart ache they go through to be themselves, with our society barely accepting them. If it's something that goes wrong in the process of brain development that I can help, then I'll do it. If it happens on its own, I'm perfectly fine with that. But calling me homophobic can't be further from the truth!
This is not exactly what you said in your blog, but it does sound slightly less crazy and judgmental, so good back-pedaling. I did NOT feel like I wasn't doing enough when I had my CP, though, that assumption on your part is completely wrong. I KNOW I didn't do anything wrong, and your insinuation in your original blog post that CPs are due to some "mistake" made by the mother is insulting, hurtful, and wrong.
Hey, no back pedaling there. Why would I say that CP or M/C are a mother's fault if I am myself not out of the woods for each one of them? Come on! Everyone who's ever been pregnant is dealthy afraid of either one of them, including me. I am simply doing what I can and think is right to possibly minimize those chances if that's how it works.
Oh, you want me to quote you? Ok:
"Pregnant woman?s immune system is suppressed from the very start and so many illnesses can be very harmful to the fetus from the first day of conception that it was very clear to us that if we were to approach the actual pregnancy in the same manner we did the preparations for it, then we need to keep me home for the whole 9 months. ... Growing a baby is such an intricate process, so many things can go wrong under the influence of seemingly harmless external factors. When the baby is very small, those mistakes in development can result in a miscarriage or a chemical pregnancy*."
Here's my interpretation: exposure to external factors = mother's mistake = M/C or CP. Many other people interpreted it this way too. So I think maybe you need to edit your blog post if you really meant it the way you corrected yourself here.
I guess for me the key word was "CAN RESULT".
Actually, I don't think I was even talking about CP, because those happen sooo early in the process that it's hard to do anything right or wrong to prevent or cause them, it's not up to us, and because of that, the second I found out I was pregnant, the thought of a CP hasn't left my mind.
If we talking about miscarriages, can they be cause by external factors? Yes! Do they all happen as a result of external factors? HELL NO!
And i guess that's what concerns me the most. That we DO NOT have a lot of say in the matter. So in my mind if I do what I can to protect myself from anything and everything can could possibly cause a problem, then I know that if a miscarraige happens I've done everything I could and there was nothing to be done. That's something that would make me personally feel better.
So you guys jumped all over the post thinking it was written about you, while it was simply written about my feelings about my pregnancy, about what would make ME be ok with whatever issues I come across during pregnancy.
As far as correcting the post, I wrote it the way I explained it here, and I am sorry that some people took it as a personal offense, but it was written for me about me and my feelings. So intead of me putting a thousand explainations into every post I write on my PERSONAL blog, maybe you all need to lighten up and realize that we, pregnant women, have the same worries and the same hopes, we all just do different things about it.
LOL, you don't even know for sure what you were talking about? Ok. Seems like a blog not worth reading to me.
I truly hope you enjoy your pregnancy and you have a happy and healthy baby, I really do. Just don't be surprised when you get called out on any misinformation and ridiculousness you post. GL.
Lurker from TTGP here...I can't hold it in anymore! Lady, you are what is wrong with society today. You are a veiled homophobe. You claim to "have gay friends and love them to death" yet you, at every turn, compare being gay to a disease or a syndrome like ADD. It's pathetic. If you "love" gay people sooo much and think there is nothing wrong with it, why would you do everything in your power to stop your child from being gay? Not to mention your ideas of what makes people gay are completely assinine. You are the type of person who should NOT be procreating. Get a fish or a cat and call it good. You are pathetic. ::vom::
Ok, I have to reply to you, because you can't be further from the truth. As I wrote in the post, I'd be completely ok with my child being gay. Some of the best most creative people I've met have been gay or transexual. But I also know how much heart ache they go through to be themselves, with our society barely accepting them. If it's something that goes wrong in the process of brain development that I can help, then I'll do it. If it happens on its own, I'm perfectly fine with that. But calling me homophobic can't be further from the truth!
Ok, see the bolded parts? Hypocrite! By the very way you describe it something has to "go wrong" for a person to be gay. I'd LOOOVE to see you say that to a group of gay people. You may act like you are super cool with people being gay, but your language tells a different story. You make me sick.
TTC #1 since April '11.- BFP 7/3/11! - EDD 3/13/12 - Dean born 3/15/12! - Lovely Labor Buddies with PsychGirl33!! </br>
I am concerned for any children you have. Are you going to keep them in a bubble away from society too because of strangers, germs, stress and lord knows what else? The womb is a safe place compared to the outside world! This is just crazy.
As far as correcting the post, I wrote it the way I explained it here, and I am sorry that some people took it as a personal offense, but it was written for me about me and my feelings. So intead of me putting a thousand explainations into every post I write on my PERSONAL blog, maybe you all need to lighten up and realize that we, pregnant women, have the same worries and the same hopes, we all just do different things about it.
If you don't want crap about the idiocy you write in your blog, don't link it in your siggy.
And before you mentioned that you were liking the hits. Do you get paid for that blog? If so, I'm reporting your ass immediately because you cannot profit from this site and you are 100% in violation of the terms of service. See ya.
As far as correcting the post, I wrote it the way I explained it here, and I am sorry that some people took it as a personal offense, but it was written for me about me and my feelings. So intead of me putting a thousand explainations into every post I write on my PERSONAL blog, maybe you all need to lighten up and realize that we, pregnant women, have the same worries and the same hopes, we all just do different things about it.
If you don't want crap about the idiocy you write in your blog, don't link it in your siggy.
And before you mentioned that you were liking the hits. Do you get paid for that blog? If so, I'm reporting your ass immediately because you cannot profit from this site and you are 100% in violation of the terms of service. See ya.
She has sponsors so she must right?
I would imagine so. As much as I'd like her to stick around for entertainment purposes, the last thing I want to do is provide her with more income to buy "millions" of more books about rats and gays.
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Implantation bleeding can be one of the earliest pregnancy symptoms. About 6-12 days after conception, the embryo implants itself into the uterine wall. Some women will experience spotting as well as some cramping.
Other Explanations: Actual menstruation, altered menstruation, changes in birth control pill, infection, or abrasion from intercourse.Link
Quoting one internet source doesn't prove anything. I've read a million books and they all have different information. I guess I'll know when I go for my first u/s
Actually, I went through a lot of pages before finding one that said this on a CREDIBLE resource. Google embryo implantation and you'll see the same info from babycenter, ibabydust.com, gettingpregnant.com, etc.
First, sorry for the wall-o-text. I'm on my phone. Second, OP, you are the worst type of homophobe. The type that hides behind a thin veil of acceptance to justify your true feelings. Third, you're an uninformed twit. After reading both your blog and your posts her, that was the nicest I could come up with. Reading one article or book does NOT make you an expert. Again, where is the scientific, peer-reviewed, not-for-profit research to back your opinions? And finally, when trying to sound intelligent, spell check is your friend. Homosexualism? Psyophrenia? And, I'm pretty sure "subconsciously" doesn't mean what you seem to think it means.
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Computer use will turn your child into a drag queen
True story
Especially is she is worried about laundry detergent, wouldn't the "radioactive" waves from the computer not only turn her child gay but cause some other catastrophe?
OP do you honestly believe you are right? Do you see how many people are telling how wrong you are? I mean is you want to get into education semantics, lets go. B/c you my dear, are not as educated as you think.
Maternal stress does not cause homosexuality. Homosexuality is not a mental illness you ignorant bimbo.
Of course it's not an illness. And it being caused by maternal anxiety doesn't make it an illness. Gender and sex develop separately in a fetus, if at a very specific time during brain development, there's too much cortisol that makes it through the placenta, that can cause gender not to "link up" with the sex. Oh, jeez, why am I even trying to educate you? Go read up on it yourself, {insert whatever name you'd like me to call you, since I won't stoop to that")
Sex, gender and SEXUALITY are 3 different things. Sex is the parts you are born with, gender is how you perceive yourself, and sexuality is what sex you are attracted to.
You can be born male, but perceive yourself as feminine but be attracted to women. They are all separate things.
NONE of these things are cause by moms going outside while they are pregnant. If they were, you would see a lot of cross gendered homosexuals out there. And in reality, there aren't that many.
BTW, all gender studies have proven that while it may seem like males and females are "wired" differently, there is way more variation with in each sex then there is between the two. This means, we are not really wired all that differently, because the norm may be women are more verbal and men more spacial or what have you but there are women who break this mold and men who do the same.
I agree that the implantation dip doesn't always happen. And you are right: I'm new at TTCing, so I might be missing something in terms of implantation ( i did have cramps too that very morning for the first time). However, I know for a fact WHEN it ovulated ( it's like clockwork for me. this was the first time it was delayed by one day) and I also know that I tested on 6DPO. So I'm not sure what that means or when it implanted. But I got a positive at 6DPO, that's for sure. Before that, the rest of the chart is ALL below my cover line.
Sorry, I just have to ask WTF am I missing here?! At 6DPO all your temps were below the cover line, yet you ovulated and had an implantation dip. Miracle of modern science...
yeah, I'm thinking someone doesn't actually know how to chart.
and if stress caused babies to be born gay, pretty much everyone would be. First time moms stress about everything, second+ time moms have other kids stressing them out while pregnant.
Michele Bachmann, is that you?
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Lock yourself in your basement and drink nothing but filtered water and organic *** for the next 9 months. That baby is going to have to overcome the stupid that is its mother and that will be a way bigger burden than "the gay".
I honestly do not know where to begin here. There is so, so much wrong with everything you've said here that I really can't find an appropriate starting point. Maybe I'll start with this: "subconscious" is not the word you were looking for a few pages back. That word is "unconscious." See, Sigmund Freud theorized that we all have 3 separate parts to our psyche, the Id, the Ego and the Superego. The Id operates on an unconscious level, meaning we are unaware of it. "Subconscious" is a dirty word in the psychological community. It's the word that uneducated people such as yourself use instead of "unconscious." And since the whole sex/gender/sexuality debate that you claim to be so educated about is rooted in psychology, I figured I'd correct that glaring piece of ignorance.
Now, as for the sex/gender/sexuality thing, you are ridiculously misinformed. First of all, homosexuality and transgender are 2 completely different things. Homosexuals do not have gender identity problems. Their sex and gender line up perfectly, but they happen to be attracted to the same sex. Transgendered individuals are physically one sex but identify with the opposite. Saying maternal stress applied at the right (or wrong, as you seem to believe) time will cause a fetus' brain to develop as the opposite sex does NOT then cause the fetus to be gay, it would cause it to be transgendered. Now that I have explained that to you, I trust that you will now understand that those terms are not interchangeable.
I personally have no problem with the lengths you are willing to go to ensure your baby is healthy. If you want to stay inside your house for 9 months and not "have fun" as you put it, then more power to you. If you want to avoid human contact as much as possible, I'm not going to stop you. These are lifestyle choices, and though I may not agree with them, you are free to live that way if you choose. I do, however, take major offense in you coming here and proclaiming you know better than the other moms on this board because you've read "millions of books" on pregnancy. Having been pregnant twice now, I can tell you that no amount of books or medical journals are really going to prepare you for the journey you may or may not be about to take. I read books in preparation of both pregnancies, and I was still surprised by how my body reacted to the new life growing inside of me. My 2nd pregnancy was far, far worse than my first one, I had pre-eclampsia and I have now been diagnosed with PPD...how could I have prepared for that? Was there something I did in the first trimester that caused me to develop pre-e? No, there wasn't. If my children end up having ADHD or dyslexia or *gasp* gender problems, does it mean that I am to blame? No one knows. There are tons of studies out there claiming to know the cause of homosexuality, transgender, and even things like autism, but the reality is that NO ONE knows for sure how or why these things happen. As far as we know it happens completely randomly. We're not talking about something like Fetal Alcohol Syndrome which has a definite cause and is most certainly tied to the mother's choices while pregnant. But to come here and say that there's even a slight chance that those who have suffered miscarriages could have been responsible for it will certainly not endear you to this community. If you want to make friends, you need to tone down the judgment and, frankly, the crazy. Most of the women here are very supportive and understanding, but they will eat you alive if you come in here spouting crap and claiming it to be medical fact. Just something for you to chew on.
It is ignorant and hurtful for you to say that external factors cause a CP. That is absolutely not true.
There is nothing that women are doing to cause an early miscarriage - they are dealing with enough grief on their own after suffering one, they don't need you telling them it was their fault as well.
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If I told my husband I was not going outside or even just seeing friends for 9 months in order to maximize my chances of having a "healthy, smart baby", he would call and set up a mental health appointment for me that day. That is not normal.
I feel badly for you, OP... I hope you get the help you so desperately need. If your husband truly supports your paranoia and delusion, then you have even worse problems.
You're not as intelligent as you believe yourself to be. I know that may come as a shock, but really, you're not. In fact, I'd venture to say that your level of intelligence is several steps below average. Coupled with delusions of grandeur, an inflated sense of self-importance, and paranoia, and we're talking all new levels of dysfunction.
Good luck to your future (potentially phantom) child(ren). They'll need all the luck they can get, with a bimbo for a mother.
Hi, I am new to this community! I just found out I was pregnant at 6DPO after 1 month of TTC and about a year of preparing to TTC. I am super excited, though a bit cautious and in disbelief because I tested so early and got a positive. I will be calling my OB to schedule blood work on Monday.
I wonder if such an early result might mean twins, since the hormone is doubled with twins.
Not true. My beta with my twins was the same as my friends beta with her singleton. Many women on the Multiples board have had the same experience.
Yeah that's what I'm kind of finding out. That's good, I guess. Twin pregnancies are high riskand while I'd love twins, if it's not it's better.
Ummm, WRONG AGAIN. Not all twin pregnancies are high risk. Do some research next time before you start babbling mindlessly. Please & thank you.
Ummm, actually you're wrong. Every twin pregnancy is high risk. Maybe you're the one who should do some research. But this isn't a thread about twin pregnancies. I came here because I heard OP was BSC.
Ok, guys! Just to set the record straight and stop getting you upset, so that YOUR baby wouldn't be gay lol
I am in NO WAY suggesting that miscarriages or chemical pregnancies are a mother's fault ( except for those who exposed themselves to substances known to cause miscarriages and birth defects). I am simply stating that for my peace of mind I would like to avoid any kinds of situations that mind in any way influence the development of my baby. I realize there is a 25% chance of miscarriage and there's nothing that can done about that- mistakes in DNA just happen- it's no one's fault. So please, please, please, take this as a "this is how I chose to approach it", rather than feeling that you might not be doing enough. This is simply our choice, everyone does what works for them.
Also, for those who don't know, gardening= toxoplasmosis if not wearing gloves. Maternal stress is linked to learning disorders, as well as sexual orientation.
You know, I would think that this, being a community of pregnant women and mothers, would show some respect to other mothers and women by using polite language and giving people the benefit of a doubt. IF this is how you're behaving towards other women, then I don't know what kind mothers you are.
I've had a few women simply tell me that they disagree with me, at which point I'd correct them explaining that they misunderstood what i was trying to say. That's how normal people behave.
Since when do we ridicule other people's healthy choices? ...oh wait, since always, because that makes us feel inadequate.
And for that "nice" person who inquired whether this causes me negative feelings- no it doesn't- all it does is bring traffic to my blog, so thank you.
Oh and one final thing: my chart- I don't have one online, however without being snide or nasty to you, it was very clear based on it when i ovulated and when the implantation happened. It is the fertilized egg that produce Hcg from what i read, so it's very possible to test at 6DPO and get a positive, I'd read some posts with women finding out at 5DPO.
Are you for real? You are going to cause your child MORE issues before AND after birth if you truly are this neurotic!
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Ummm, actually you're wrong. Every twin pregnancy is high risk. Maybe you're the one who should do some research. But this isn't a thread about twin pregnancies. I came here because I heard OP was BSC.
Yep, she is.
no. they're not. Maybe YOUR ob considers all twins to be high risk, but that most certainly is not the case everywhere. Is there a higher chance that your pregnancy will become high risk? Absolutely. Does a twin pg automatically equal high risk? no, it doesn't.
I have 3 friends who had home water births with their twins. I have 3 others who did have high risk pregnancies with their twins...but their twins were not the only cause. I know others that had their babies in hospitals without being considered high risk at all as well.
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Re: Newly Pregnant - 9DPO
Try to be calm, most of you ARE growing a human being inside of you!
What you're referring to is not sexuality, who you find attractive, but gender, which is how you experience biological sex. So what you're worried about is that your child will be trans-gendered rather than homosexual?
I can promise you, there is NOTHING that you as a mother can do that would make your child transgendered.
that my dear, I simply call "perception". I don't disagree that the male and female brains are wired differently, but to preach that something the mothers do while pregnant is causing their children to be homosexual is so out there, it's ridiculous.
I think you need to put down the "millions" of books you've read and maybe learn not to but so much weight on every single damn thing you've come across.
LCT - 5.15.14 ~ 9lbs, 22.5 inches
It's not smth a mother would ever do subconciously. Just like miscarriages simply happen, just like fetuses have birth defect at no fault of the mother, this is the same thing. So the point is NOT how it happens or whether it's true or not, but that shouldn't we all do our best at doing everything possible to protect that fetus. So those studies must or must not be true. But do we want to take a chance? I don't. So I'll do what I can to reduce my stress during those nice months. That's all I am saying- stress reduction will only benefit the mother and the fetus.
This is not exactly what you said in your blog, but it does sound slightly less crazy and judgmental, so good back-pedaling. I did NOT feel like I wasn't doing enough when I had my CP, though, that assumption on your part is completely wrong. I KNOW I didn't do anything wrong, and your insinuation in your original blog post that CPs are due to some "mistake" made by the mother is insulting, hurtful, and wrong.
Gardening == toxoplasmosis if not wearing gloves. Gardening where cats poop and not wearing gloves and not washing your hands and then putting your hands in your mouth COULD transmit toxoplasmosis. But hey, if you want to avoid gardening and dirt and your friends for 9 months, go right ahead.
Oh goody, the "you must all be horrible mothers because you were rude to me" line! Now this thread is complete.
LOL, so any time anyone disagrees with you they are actually WRONG and you "correct" them! Aren't you a smarty pants!
Your "healthy choices" don't make me feel inadequate, they make me feel sane. So thanks for that.
You're welcome, I hope it brings many people as much entertainment as it's brought me.
Hey, no back pedaling there. Why would I say that CP or M/C are a mother's fault if I am myself not out of the woods for each one of them? Come on! Everyone who's ever been pregnant is dealthy afraid of either one of them, including me. I am simply doing what I can and think is right to possibly minimize those chances if that's how it works.
Oh, you want me to quote you? Ok:
"Pregnant woman?s immune system is suppressed from the very start and so many illnesses can be very harmful to the fetus from the first day of conception that it was very clear to us that if we were to approach the actual pregnancy in the same manner we did the preparations for it, then we need to keep me home for the whole 9 months. ... Growing a baby is such an intricate process, so many things can go wrong under the influence of seemingly harmless external factors. When the baby is very small, those mistakes in development can result in a miscarriage or a chemical pregnancy*."
Here's my interpretation: exposure to external factors = mother's mistake = M/C or CP. Many other people interpreted it this way too. So I think maybe you need to edit your blog post if you really meant it the way you corrected yourself here.
I guess for me the key word was "CAN RESULT".
Actually, I don't think I was even talking about CP, because those happen sooo early in the process that it's hard to do anything right or wrong to prevent or cause them, it's not up to us, and because of that, the second I found out I was pregnant, the thought of a CP hasn't left my mind.
If we talking about miscarriages, can they be cause by external factors? Yes!
Do they all happen as a result of external factors? HELL NO!
And i guess that's what concerns me the most. That we DO NOT have a lot of say in the matter. So in my mind if I do what I can to protect myself from anything and everything can could possibly cause a problem, then I know that if a miscarraige happens I've done everything I could and there was nothing to be done. That's something that would make me personally feel better.
So you guys jumped all over the post thinking it was written about you, while it was simply written about my feelings about my pregnancy, about what would make ME be ok with whatever issues I come across during pregnancy.
As far as correcting the post, I wrote it the way I explained it here, and I am sorry that some people took it as a personal offense, but it was written for me about me and my feelings. So intead of me putting a thousand explainations into every post I write on my PERSONAL blog, maybe you all need to lighten up and realize that we, pregnant women, have the same worries and the same hopes, we all just do different things about it.
Wow, so I guess flying to San Diego when I was 6 weeks PG caused my miscarriage.
You are incredibly misinformed and the fact that you continue to spout off information you believe to be true even after being corrected makes you appear to be even more idiotic.
I think the saddest part of this is that you honestly believe that you are well educated and think that you know what is best. Its scary.
Ok, I have to reply to you, because you can't be further from the truth. As I wrote in the post, I'd be completely ok with my child being gay. Some of the best most creative people I've met have been gay or transexual. But I also know how much heart ache they go through to be themselves, with our society barely accepting them.
If it's something that goes wrong in the process of brain development that I can help, then I'll do it. If it happens on its own, I'm perfectly fine with that.
But calling me homophobic can't be further from the truth!
My thoughts exactally.
LOL, you don't even know for sure what you were talking about? Ok. Seems like a blog not worth reading to me.
I truly hope you enjoy your pregnancy and you have a happy and healthy baby, I really do. Just don't be surprised when you get called out on any misinformation and ridiculousness you post. GL.
Ok, see the bolded parts? Hypocrite! By the very way you describe it something has to "go wrong" for a person to be gay. I'd LOOOVE to see you say that to a group of gay people. You may act like you are super cool with people being gay, but your language tells a different story. You make me sick.
She has sponsors so she must right?
I would imagine so. As much as I'd like her to stick around for entertainment purposes, the last thing I want to do is provide her with more income to buy "millions" of more books about rats and gays.
Actually, I went through a lot of pages before finding one that said this on a CREDIBLE resource. Google embryo implantation and you'll see the same info from babycenter, ibabydust.com, gettingpregnant.com, etc.
Computer use will turn your child into a drag queen
True story
Your blog read like a crazy person's manifesto.
Especially is she is worried about laundry detergent, wouldn't the "radioactive" waves from the computer not only turn her child gay but cause some other catastrophe?
OP do you honestly believe you are right? Do you see how many people are telling how wrong you are? I mean is you want to get into education semantics, lets go. B/c you my dear, are not as educated as you think.
ROFL!!! I just spewed my ginger ale every where! thanks! LMAO!!!!
January 2012 Blog
Sex, gender and SEXUALITY are 3 different things.
Sex is the parts you are born with, gender is how you perceive yourself, and sexuality is what sex you are attracted to.
You can be born male, but perceive yourself as feminine but be attracted to women. They are all separate things.
NONE of these things are cause by moms going outside while they are pregnant. If they were, you would see a lot of cross gendered homosexuals out there. And in reality, there aren't that many.
BTW, all gender studies have proven that while it may seem like males and females are "wired" differently, there is way more variation with in each sex then there is between the two. This means, we are not really wired all that differently, because the norm may be women are more verbal and men more spacial or what have you but there are women who break this mold and men who do the same.
So there you go! Ta-DAAAA!!!
Can someone please explain the universe to me? Why is she PG and I'm not???
I think my head might explode...
Me: 32 - Stage II Endo / DH: 36 - Low count and morphology (1%)
IUIs 1-3 BFN, lap Dec. 2010, IUIs 4-6 BFN
IVF w/ICSI #1 - ER 2/8: 24R 19M 9F ET 2/13 2-5 day blasts (no frosties) = BFP - b/g twins!
E & C Born 10/19/2012
yeah, I'm thinking someone doesn't actually know how to chart.
and if stress caused babies to be born gay, pretty much everyone would be. First time moms stress about everything, second+ time moms have other kids stressing them out while pregnant.
Michele Bachmann, is that you?
Lock yourself in your basement and drink nothing but filtered water and organic *** for the next 9 months. That baby is going to have to overcome the stupid that is its mother and that will be a way bigger burden than "the gay".
I honestly do not know where to begin here. There is so, so much wrong with everything you've said here that I really can't find an appropriate starting point. Maybe I'll start with this: "subconscious" is not the word you were looking for a few pages back. That word is "unconscious." See, Sigmund Freud theorized that we all have 3 separate parts to our psyche, the Id, the Ego and the Superego. The Id operates on an unconscious level, meaning we are unaware of it. "Subconscious" is a dirty word in the psychological community. It's the word that uneducated people such as yourself use instead of "unconscious." And since the whole sex/gender/sexuality debate that you claim to be so educated about is rooted in psychology, I figured I'd correct that glaring piece of ignorance.
Now, as for the sex/gender/sexuality thing, you are ridiculously misinformed. First of all, homosexuality and transgender are 2 completely different things. Homosexuals do not have gender identity problems. Their sex and gender line up perfectly, but they happen to be attracted to the same sex. Transgendered individuals are physically one sex but identify with the opposite. Saying maternal stress applied at the right (or wrong, as you seem to believe) time will cause a fetus' brain to develop as the opposite sex does NOT then cause the fetus to be gay, it would cause it to be transgendered. Now that I have explained that to you, I trust that you will now understand that those terms are not interchangeable.
I personally have no problem with the lengths you are willing to go to ensure your baby is healthy. If you want to stay inside your house for 9 months and not "have fun" as you put it, then more power to you. If you want to avoid human contact as much as possible, I'm not going to stop you. These are lifestyle choices, and though I may not agree with them, you are free to live that way if you choose. I do, however, take major offense in you coming here and proclaiming you know better than the other moms on this board because you've read "millions of books" on pregnancy. Having been pregnant twice now, I can tell you that no amount of books or medical journals are really going to prepare you for the journey you may or may not be about to take. I read books in preparation of both pregnancies, and I was still surprised by how my body reacted to the new life growing inside of me. My 2nd pregnancy was far, far worse than my first one, I had pre-eclampsia and I have now been diagnosed with PPD...how could I have prepared for that? Was there something I did in the first trimester that caused me to develop pre-e? No, there wasn't. If my children end up having ADHD or dyslexia or *gasp* gender problems, does it mean that I am to blame? No one knows. There are tons of studies out there claiming to know the cause of homosexuality, transgender, and even things like autism, but the reality is that NO ONE knows for sure how or why these things happen. As far as we know it happens completely randomly. We're not talking about something like Fetal Alcohol Syndrome which has a definite cause and is most certainly tied to the mother's choices while pregnant. But to come here and say that there's even a slight chance that those who have suffered miscarriages could have been responsible for it will certainly not endear you to this community. If you want to make friends, you need to tone down the judgment and, frankly, the crazy. Most of the women here are very supportive and understanding, but they will eat you alive if you come in here spouting crap and claiming it to be medical fact. Just something for you to chew on.
It is ignorant and hurtful for you to say that external factors cause a CP. That is absolutely not true.
There is nothing that women are doing to cause an early miscarriage - they are dealing with enough grief on their own after suffering one, they don't need you telling them it was their fault as well.
If I told my husband I was not going outside or even just seeing friends for 9 months in order to maximize my chances of having a "healthy, smart baby", he would call and set up a mental health appointment for me that day. That is not normal.
I feel badly for you, OP... I hope you get the help you so desperately need. If your husband truly supports your paranoia and delusion, then you have even worse problems.
You're not as intelligent as you believe yourself to be. I know that may come as a shock, but really, you're not. In fact, I'd venture to say that your level of intelligence is several steps below average. Coupled with delusions of grandeur, an inflated sense of self-importance, and paranoia, and we're talking all new levels of dysfunction.
Good luck to your future (potentially phantom) child(ren). They'll need all the luck they can get, with a bimbo for a mother.
It looks like she is, and she's a mail order bride.
Creeptastic.
Ummm, actually you're wrong. Every twin pregnancy is high risk. Maybe you're the one who should do some research. But this isn't a thread about twin pregnancies. I came here because I heard OP was BSC.
Yep, she is.
6 IUIs,IVF #1 w/ICSI = BFP!
Betas, 332 & 856 = twins!
Our baby girl is here!
Are you for real? You are going to cause your child MORE issues before AND after birth if you truly are this neurotic!
no. they're not. Maybe YOUR ob considers all twins to be high risk, but that most certainly is not the case everywhere. Is there a higher chance that your pregnancy will become high risk? Absolutely. Does a twin pg automatically equal high risk? no, it doesn't.
I have 3 friends who had home water births with their twins. I have 3 others who did have high risk pregnancies with their twins...but their twins were not the only cause. I know others that had their babies in hospitals without being considered high risk at all as well.
This.
This post is extremely disturbing.