Military Families

DH deployed today :-(

I know we've all been through deployments before and I'm not looking for anyone's sympathy, I just need somewhere to share my feelings with others who know what I'm going through. 

DH just got back from Iraq last May and was home on dwell time until yesterday.  His unit deployed in February, so we kind of got to skip the first three months of the deployment, which is awesome, but this still sucks.  Since he is arriving late he doesn't get leave and they don't know for sure if this deployment will be 9 months or 12, so it's hard to set a date in my head to look forward to.  This is his third deployment, but his first to Afghanistan and his first time leaving DD.  I know we'll all make it to the end of this deployment no worse for wear, but I'm still sad, obviously.  Before having DD deployments didn't seem THAT bad, but I am dreading this one!!  I just feel so alone this time and I know DH is going to miss so many things.  Ugh!!  Ok I'm done wallowing.  Thanks for reading if you made it this far.  I'm gonna go keep myself busy now lol!

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Re: DH deployed today :-(

  • J+MSJ+MS
    10000 Comments 250 Answers Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
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    No matter how many deployments you have been through, it still sucks. They really are the worst.
    "Seriously, mommy forum people are some crazy ass bitches." New Year New You
  • I said goodbye to my husband last night too.  Sucks.  Hang in there!

    Married 6/28/03

    Kate ~ 7/3/09 *** Connor ~ 11/11/10

    4 miscarriages: 2007, 2009, 2013, 2014

    *~*~*~*~*

    No more TTC for us. We are done, and at peace, as a family of 4.

    "Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but – I hope – into a better shape.” — Charles Dickens

     

  • image J+MS:
    No matter how many deployments you have been through, it still sucks. They really are the worst.

    Exactly. It still sucks. 

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    *Baby I Mar. 2011*
  • Deployments suck no matter how many you've been through.  It's ok to be sad about it.  Keeping your calendar full will help.  Also, go ahead and plan for him to be gone for 12 months.  If you get the final word that it is for sure 12 months, you won't be disapointed.  If you get word he will only be gone for 9 months, you get a great suprise. 


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  • I agree with the PP keep your calendar full and plan for the 12months.  My DH deployed in Dec but will be home in July, our DD is 5 going on 6 and him missing her first year of school was a little rough on her at first.  FOr the most part just stay busy and having a LO makes it go much faster in my opinion.  You are preoccupied with them and their needs.
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  • image sweetpea2003:
    I said goodbye to my husband last night too.  Sucks.  Hang in there!

    Sorry your DH left too.  We'll hang in there together lol!

    Thanks for the support everyone.  I'm definitely keeping myself busy.  I'm part of New Parent Support Group through ACS here and we already have 17 events planned for June and we meet every Tues and Fri in May, not to mention doctor's appointments, Skype dates with friends, and tons of new craft projects!

    I think one of the hardest parts about this deployment is that I have no timeframe.  There's no "leave will be sometime in November" or "we should be home around March"...whatever.  It's just like I have nothing to count down to and it makes it hard to grasp how long I have left.  I don't know if that makes any sense.  I'm just going to try to use DD's birthday as my countdown marker because he'll for sure be home by then.

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  • BeachMBeachM
    10000 Comments Eighth Anniversary 250 Answers 500 Love Its
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    image Brit242:

    I think one of the hardest parts about this deployment is that I have no timeframe.  There's no "leave will be sometime in November" or "we should be home around March"...whatever.  It's just like I have nothing to count down to and it makes it hard to grasp how long I have left.  I don't know if that makes any sense.  I'm just going to try to use DD's birthday as my countdown marker because he'll for sure be home by then.

    This would make me insane.  I hope it goes by very quickly for you!

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  • Epeter1Epeter1 member
    Theres a chance my DH may deploy in November- he just came home from iraq in October. We werent married when he deployed last time. Now were married, and our DD is due 3 months before he might deploy.
    No matter what anyone says its still rough- whether its the first time or the 10th.


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  • Are there any other moms with young kids/babies for you to hang out with? My girlfriend and I had our babies just 1 week apart and our husbands were gone together. It was awesome having her to spend time with.

    There was none of that "well, let me ask my husband, or we have plans" We could just pick the kids up and visit or go out to dinner any time we wanted and we had a great time! We even made a couple trips to Paris together.

    image

    DS-11 years, DD-3 years, DS-born 9/15/10, DD-9/09/11
    You're just giving birth now, you're not mother Earth now
  • image UberTroll:

    Are there any other moms with young kids/babies for you to hang out with? My girlfriend and I had our babies just 1 week apart and our husbands were gone together. It was awesome having her to spend time with.

    There was none of that "well, let me ask my husband, or we have plans" We could just pick the kids up and visit or go out to dinner any time we wanted and we had a great time! We even made a couple trips to Paris together.

    I am part of the New Parent Support Program offered through ACS.  There are about 10 of us that come on a regular basis.  We meet twice a week and do all sorts of things.  Picnics, crafts, movies, shopping, etc.  There is one lady whose son was born the day after my daughter, one other lady with a 3 year old and 1 year old (and is pregnant) and the rest of the ladies are due anytime between next week and November.  It's a lot of fun and it's a great support system.  All of their husbands are deployed as well so we're all in the same boat.

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  • I said goodbye to DH on Friday. We've been trying for baby #1 for but for the past 8 months his workups and training has taken up much of our baby making time! He seems to be gone at the best times when it would be convenient, like when I'm ovulating. We are hoping to pick back up when he gets home and he should (fingers crossed) be home for a whole year then! GL to you on this deployment Big Smile
    TTC our first Navy baby! Me:27 DH:30, together since 8/2003, Married on 7/2006
    9/26/10 stopped BCP and started TTC.
    9/2011 referred to RE. All blood work normal and DH's SA=normal results
    11/2011 HSG=both tubes clear
    One natural (monitored) cycle of Clomid, 50mg 2/2012= BFN
    Getting ready for first IUI, 3/2012 received orders to Japan! (postponed IUI)
    5/2012 Moved to Japan, fought Tricare for months over referral (no fertility treatment on our military base) for Japanese RE out in town!
    8/2012 Started seeing new RE
    9/2012, post coital test= hostile cervical fluid, (finally) moving on with first IUI!
    9/29/2012 IUI #1+trigger= BFN
    10/27/2012 IUI #2+100mg Clomid CD5-9+trigger= BFN
    11/28/2012 IUI #3+100mg Clomid CD5-9+trigger= BFN
    12/28/2012 IUI#4+100mg Clomid CD5-9+trigger=BFN
    2/1/2013 IUI#5+injectables+trigger=BFN
    3/2013 IUI#6+injectables+trigger=???
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