November 2011 Moms

S/O names, getting flack for your choice

It's not like it's a huge issue right now, especially since we don't know whether or not this LO is a boy or girl...BUT...

We have shared our girl name with people that ask because it's the only one that's decided on.  It wasn't well received by a few, and I kinda bit my tongue about it.

Well, we are sharing the names as soon as we decide and as soon as know about the boy/girl thing, and I have decided that I am going to start telling people that give rude responses FLAT OUT that their comments are rude and insensitive!  If they have the nerve to be that rude then I can have the nerve to tell them just how rude they are!

Anyone else with me on this?

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Re: S/O names, getting flack for your choice

  • I just posted a comment about this on the clicky poll. We have been getting some terrible comments on our boys name: Calvin. Oh well, I basically tell them you had/can have your own opportunity to name a child, this is ours. Basically it doesn't matter what anyone says DH and I love it.
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  • HadleySHadleyS member

    image Shpointers:
    I just posted a comment about this on the clicky poll. We have been getting some terrible comments on our boys name: Calvin. Oh well, I basically tell them you had/can have your own opportunity to name a child, this is ours. Basically it doesn't matter what anyone says DH and I love it.

    Yeah, I saw that, and I thought this topic was large enough to stand alone in its own thread.  I am really curious to know how everyone feels about it.

    Calvin is one of many on our list of boy names!  It's my dad's middle name, so I am hoping that fact alone will shut a few people up if we use it somewhere in a boy's name.

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  • JanimalJanimal
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    When people would ask about DD's name when I was pg with her, I would tell them that I would tell them, but they had to swear not to say anything negative at all.  That the only opinion I was interested in hearing was "Oh that's so pretty" so if they couldn't promise to say that I wouldn't tell them.  Everyone agreed and we told our name and it was lovely!

    EXCEPT - for FIL.  He asked about names and I rattled off our shortened list and when I said "Delilah" (which was my favorite) he made some "yuck" sound.  I never told DH.  If DH knew his Dad "yucked" the name, he probably wouldn't have agreed to Delilah!

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  • I don't want to share the names at all, exactly for this reason.  Of course, what's one of the first things my Mom asked when I told her the news yesterday?  lol  I told her we were still debating- which is true, even though we have a forerunner for each sex.  I made the mistake of saying we're looking at Irish names, after which she gave a little "hmm" and I could totally hear the wheels starting to turn.  I'm just waiting to get inundated with suggestions now... LOL
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  • HadleySHadleyS member

    I love Delilah!  DH likes a few other names a little more, so I had to bump it down on our list.  The girl name in question for us is Vera ("Veeera") Katherine.  We got flack for it on both sides of the family, and that's just tough.  If we ever have a daughter, that will ber her name and that's all there is to it.

    I like your idea though, Janimal, of warning those who really want to know.  It's certainly something to think about when sharing!

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  • i've dealt with a negative comments about our name choice.. no one has come right out and said anything to our faces but my friend wasn't in love with it at first. but like i told her, that will be this baby's name if he is in fact a boy, so you better get used to it. she said its grown on her now and she loves it.. something she wouldn't say if she didn't really mean it.

    i'm okay with people not liking our name because its not that common.. but being rude is unacceptable i think. if its not your style, that's fine.. but if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

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  • Our girl name is Ivory and I know people will have an opinion because it isn't a traditional name, but DH and I love it :)
    Married to the love of my life and proud parents of two boys

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  • image HadleyS:

    It's not like it's a huge issue right now, especially since we don't know whether or not this LO is a boy or girl...BUT...

    We have shared our girl name with people that ask because it's the only one that's decided on.  It wasn't well received by a few, and I kinda bit my tongue about it.

    Well, we are sharing the names as soon as we decide and as soon as know about the boy/girl thing, and I have decided that I am going to start telling people that give rude responses FLAT OUT that their comments are rude and insensitive!  If they have the nerve to be that rude then I can have the nerve to tell them just how rude they are!

    Anyone else with me on this?

    Calvin is adorable!  Are you going to call him Cal?  I love NN.  We have had a bit of this problem, but I don't care.  Gordon for a boy, which was my Meme's maiden name, and Evelyn for a girl.  We know Gordon is a bit out of the ordinary, but that is exactly why we like it!

  • image HadleyS:

    I love Delilah!  DH likes a few other names a little more, so I had to bump it down on our list.  The girl name in question for us is Vera ("Veeera") Katherine.  We got flack for it on both sides of the family, and that's just tough.  If we ever have a daughter, that will ber her name and that's all there is to it.

    I like your idea though, Janimal, of warning those who really want to know.  It's certainly something to think about when sharing!

    Wth is with people? Hadley, Vera is a beautiful name! I've gotten weird faces when I've told people our girl's name choice and then I'll add that it incorporates my late grandmother's name (which is true). That seems to shut them up. 

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  • HadleySHadleyS member
    image jennicg27:
    image HadleyS:

    It's not like it's a huge issue right now, especially since we don't know whether or not this LO is a boy or girl...BUT...

    We have shared our girl name with people that ask because it's the only one that's decided on.  It wasn't well received by a few, and I kinda bit my tongue about it.

    Well, we are sharing the names as soon as we decide and as soon as know about the boy/girl thing, and I have decided that I am going to start telling people that give rude responses FLAT OUT that their comments are rude and insensitive!  If they have the nerve to be that rude then I can have the nerve to tell them just how rude they are!

    Anyone else with me on this?

    Calvin is adorable!  Are you going to call him Cal?  I love NN.  We have had a bit of this problem, but I don't care.  Gordon for a boy, which was my Meme's maiden name, and Evelyn for a girl.  We know Gordon is a bit out of the ordinary, but that is exactly why we like it!

    Well, we haven't totally decided on whether or not to use it...we just can't settle on one boy name, but I do have a cousin on that side of the family that goes by Cal, so we would use the entire name.

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    BabyFruit Ticker
    *Congrats to buddies MrsAtch, cflocco, MommyandKate, luckylady55, opallover, trishiepoo, stephsteph77, and Pachita! Praying for healthy babies for all of you!*
    *Congrats to my buddy, Izabella22 (BFP 5/11/11)!!!Sending you Ts and Ps for a healthy, take-home baby!
    *Congrats to my buddy, myaddiwaddi06(BFP 10/31/11)!!!Sending you Ts and Ps for a healthy, take-home baby!
  • We are telling when we find out the sex.  It doesn't matter if they say they don't like the name before the baby comes or if they think it or talk about it behind my back after the baby is here.  I like our names and that is what matters.  You can't change other people's opinions and that is all they are, opinions.  I'm not that sensitive I guess.
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  • We are not telling a soul until after the baby is born!  Just don't want to deal with people's crap.  Esp since our girl name is a little unusual.

    This is, of course, as long as DH can keep the secret!  I'm starting to have my doubts.  We work at the same place and agreed not to tell anyone that I'm pg until 2nd tri.  Well, he's already told 5 people!!!  Arg.  Hopefully they all keep their mouths shut

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  • Do not start telling people the names you've chosen. They'll always have something to day about it.
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  • One of the first things out of my grandmother's mouth when we told her about the twins yesterday was "You aren't going to name them something weird are you??"  I have a feeling her definition of "weird" and mine are not the same, LOL!!!

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  • We don't have a boy's name picked out, but we decided on our girl's name the day I found out I was pregnant: Katherine Rose, with Kate as a nickname.  I share it with people who ask, but I've never been one to care too much about what others think.  I've only gotten positive responses as it is a classic name (or people fear me, ha). 

    "I know not all that may be coming, but be it what it will, I'll go to it laughing."



  • We already have our names picked out, but we're only telling people if they ask at this point. So far, everyone has been nice and said they think the names are adorable.
    I'm pretty sure that if anyone ever asks, and offers a rude opinion, I'm just going to smile sweetly and say, "I didn't ask."
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  • My boyfriend told his mother yesterday about the name I LOVE for a boy and she said it was horrible and made a big fuss about it saying we need to vote on it and raising her and and saying no. It was very hurtful. Everyone else I have told has loved (or said they loved) the name. She is Russian and wants a Russian name but it would be something I couldn't even say. I will not be talking to her anymore about baby names. I was able to hold my tongue the first time but I wont be so nice next time
  • image ashleytlove:
    My boyfriend told his mother yesterday about the name I LOVE for a boy and she said it was horrible and made a big fuss about it saying we need to vote on it and raising her and and saying no. It was very hurtful. Everyone else I have told has loved (or said they loved) the name. She is Russian and wants a Russian name but it would be something I couldn't even say. I will not be talking to her anymore about baby names. I was able to hold my tongue the first time but I wont be so nice next time

    My mother named me after a member of her family who had a Russian name, but she used the American version.  I thank her every day for doing that.  I thought about maybe doing a Russian name, but hearing my husband try to pronounce the ones I like made me change my mind.

    If she starts again, remind her that he had her fun naming kids, or at least imagine you said that to her.

    "I know not all that may be coming, but be it what it will, I'll go to it laughing."



  • My daughter is giving us a hard time about our girl name choice (Lillian Grace) she says she hates it and that we should pick something else. I tried to be patient and looked up names with her but I didn't like anything she liked. She told her friends our name pick for a girl and all of her friends loved it. I don't think it's a jealousy thing since she wants to pick other names with us but it still hurt my feelings. My daughter is actually my stepdaughter and I of course wasn't around 14 years ago to pick her name. This is my first biological child and I was so excited about the name I picked for a girl. She likes the boy name (John Lee) (although she doesn't want us to have a boy). It just sucks to have her be so mean about the name I like so much, it makes me not want to tell her about these things. I know I am being overly emotional and need to just ignore it but ugh it aggravates me.
  • This is exactly why DH and I are keeping LO's name a secret until after the birth
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