Attachment Parenting

If you bedshare...please come in

DS is 5 weeks old and wont sleep anywhere else but in our bed. We dont mind and we use to prop him up on his boppy pillow but now he's starting to wiggle and move more and doesnt stay high up on it so its a problem. DH doesnt mind to have him sleep on his chest  but he cant get 100% restful sleep. I tried rolling one of his blankets last night so that he would feel "tightness" on his body but that didnt work. His moved his little arms all night. He doesnt like to be swaddled either.

Any recommendations and ideas on how we can safely bedshare?

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Re: If you bedshare...please come in

  • image nickcrazy16:

    DS is 5 weeks old and wont sleep anywhere else but in our bed. We dont mind and we use to prop him up on his boppy pillow but now he's starting to wiggle and move more and doesnt stay high up on it so its a problem. DH doesnt mind to have him sleep on his chest  but he cant get 100% restful sleep. I tried rolling one of his blankets last night so that he would feel "tightness" on his body but that didnt work. His moved his little arms all night. He doesnt like to be swaddled either.

    Any recommendations and ideas on how we can safely bedshare?

    Are you 100% sure?  I think most babies fight the swaddle, and will even cry during the process, but they are MUCH happier once they're all wrapped up.  I also though DS didn't like to be swaddled, but I realized he calmed down faster and slept way longer when I did it. 

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  • DD hated the swaddle too.

    Have you thought about something like the snuggle nest? Otherwise there are safe ways to bedshare. You can remove blankets and pillows to make the space safe for baby. 

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  • image BelhurstBride:

    DD hated the swaddle too.

    Have you thought about something like the snuggle nest? Otherwise there are safe ways to bedshare. You can remove blankets and pillows to make the space safe for baby. 

    Since our DD was born we have slept this way.  We had her at home, so this is the only way she has ever slept.  DH and I each only use 1 pillow and we don't pull the blanket up above our waists.  We both feel really safe and DD sleeps really well this way.  

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  • I think the safest way to bedshare is without a boppy/blankets/having the baby sleep on someone. My LO sleeps on his side facing me and I sleep on my side facing him. If he starts to get fussy I'll put my hand on his back or his shoulder and he calms down right away. 
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  • I second the suggestion to retry the swaddle. We couldn't swaddle LO because she had problems with a dislocated hip from being breech but we were desperate for sleep and tried it after a month. It made a huge difference and she fussed like crazy at first but then slept really deeply.

    We sleep with one pillow each and have a light comforter we use. LO also sleeps mostly in the crook of my arm but now that she's more mobile she's all over the place.


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  • image Jennis22:
    I think the safest way to bedshare is without a boppy/blankets/having the baby sleep on someone. My LO sleeps on his side facing me and I sleep on my side facing him. If he starts to get fussy I'll put my hand on his back or his shoulder and he calms down right away. 

    This!  The Boppy even has a big sign on it that says not for sleeping.

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  • I second using one pillow each, a light comforter at your waist and having LO in the crook of your arm facing each other. It works awesome and Dr. Sears cites research that mommies may act as pacemakers, reminding our LOs to breathe. Plus, it makes BFing crazy easy if you BF!
  • image Dreamsicle23:

    Are you 100% sure?  I think most babies fight the swaddle, and will even cry during the process, but they are MUCH happier once they're all wrapped up.  I also though DS didn't like to be swaddled, but I realized he calmed down faster and slept way longer when I did it. 

     

    This, this, this! It took me 5 months to figure this out and by then it was only about 6 weeks before DS was able to break out of even the tightest swaddle, but when he was swaddled, his naps instantly went from 45 mins to an hour and a half. 

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  • We were in a similar situation with DD where she wouldn't sleep anywhere but in bed cuddled up next to me. That's very sweet, and I love it, but it's not convenient since she's supposed to get so many hours of sleep. We had a co-sleeper bassinet next to the bed, but she didn't like being placed in there. I basically didn't leave the bedroom much for the first few weeks!

    I was also concerned about co-sleeping safely, especially since DH and I were so tired by the time we were going to sleep. So DH bought a snuggle nest to put her in bed between us. We could still reach in and put a hand on her, so she would sleep fine in it, and I would just pick her up and place her next to me to nurse and then put her back in. Having that big thing between us just wasn't very comfortable, so once she was sleeping well in the snuggle nest, we actually placed it inside the co-sleeper bassinet to make it cozier, and she has been doing better with it. That said, she does like to be swaddled, so that helps. DH swaddles her at bedtime and puts her down in the nest, and then I unswaddle her to bring her into bed to nurse when I go to bed. After her 4-5am feeding, I will swaddle her again and put her in the nest until the morning. I usually have to wait until she's nearly asleep before I can swaddle her, otherwise, she will put up a fight (even though she loves being swaddled!) and wake herself back up.

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