August 2011 Moms

Nervous after a loss

I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks this fall, and was just shocked after having a fairly easy pregnancy with my daughter, who will be 3 in June '11. Now that we're 19 wks prego with another baby, I'm so nervous that something will go wrong. I've felt movement since 14 wks, just like my daughter, but it's been so slight. Maybe that means this baby will be calmer than her (I hope!) but it's sure not reassuring to me at this point! The big anatomy U/S is next Wednesday... anyone else in the same boat after a loss?

Re: Nervous after a loss

  • Have you checked out the Pregnant After a Loss board?  We all get what you're feeling.  ((((hugs))))
    BFP#1 4/17/10...EDD 1/6/11...M/C 5/28/10 BFP#2 11/19/10...EDD 8/4/11 Squeaker born 7/30.
  • I had three losses; all were in the 1st trimester (latest one at 10 weeks last may).  I am also 19 weeks and I think the odds of loss are drastically reduced at this point for both of us.  Take heart knowing you have had a healthy baby before and you have felt kicks! These are both things I wish I had under my belt (this is going to be my first and I have yet to feel kicking).  I think the fear never goes away, but talking about it can help release it.  Best of luck to you!

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  • I'm the same way. I had a loss at ~11 weeks and then another one at ~9 weeks. Most days I'm so happy and grateful that this pregnancy is progressing and then other days I'm a panicky mess. Today my LO is kicking the crap out of me (probably the Frosty I had for lunch) to remind s/he is A OK in there.
  • I had a missed m/c at 10w this summer- I have been a nervous wreck, but the anatomy scan really put me at ease and I am really starting to be confident and enjoy this pregnancy.   My best advice is to try and relax and I think the anatomy u/s will give you some comfort!  hugs.
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  • Yes, I had a loss at 7 weeks in August.  I've been pretty nervous throughout this pregnancy.  My m/c was definitely a loss of innocence.  After the anatomy scan and now that I'm feeling kicks, I'm feeling so much better! Hopefully this continues for the rest of the time.
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  • Yes, I can hardly wait for the anatomy scan. I'm a nurse, and have occasionally hidden with the Doppler or U/S in the ER at work to reassure myself. I've never done OB though, so all I know is basic anatomy and watching that beautiful heart beating. Last week an L&D nurse girlfriend sent me in because my OB's triage nurse was pooh-poohing my concerns of loss of fetal movement x3days, frequent passing out, and RLQ abdominal pain. I just couldn't calm down until I heard a heartbeat. They sent me home and told me to calm down. SO! I've started having a small glass of wine at night if I'm feeling nervous... just a few times, so no guilt here. Can't wait til that U/S Wednesday though...
  • it never goes away... Just like Karen said.. visit us a PGAL they are a wonderful group and full of women in the same boat... I visit here and there but those ladies totally know the sense of loss and dread that your going through... ((HUGS))
    BFP #1 04/05/10 EDD 12/11/10 Missed M/C 7w found out at 12w5d You're so missed LO BFP #2 11/27/10 EDD 08/07/11.. Diagnosed with IC 03/17/11 Cerclage put in place 03/21/11 Madilynn Mae born 7/26/11
  • I think any of us that have had a loss feel that exact same way. I have started to feel better now that I feel movement, but I am still nervous very often.

    Hang in there and best wishes to you.

    Married & TTC #1 since 8/28/10 BFP #1 10/25/10 - EDD 7/5/11 -M/C 11/10/10 BFP #2 12/16/10 - EDD 8/26/11 - BORN 8/10/11 Photobucket Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I also had a loss at 10 weeks this past summer. I have a DD who is 5 and I have a perfect pregnancy with her so this loss was a complete shock and devistation to us. We were thrilled to get pregnant again so quickly but have been very on edge about everything. I had 2 early u/s at 7 and 10 weeks and both were wonderful. I am still awaiting my anatomy scan (next week) and that will certainly put me as ease. I am excited to start feeling kicks as it will reassure me that LO is still doing well.
    God Bless you!!!
    Proud Mommy of Olivia and Alaina


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  • TY girls! Another thing I didn't mention is I've only gained 1lb. At 5'4" and 128 now that's not much at all, but maybe I'll just be even smaller and healthier after the birth! DH is worried about me getting enough nutrition; he thinks I'm not eating enough, but I think I'm fine - he's comparing this to how I overate and totally abused the "I'm pregnant, I want it, I'm eating it!" when pg with our daughter and gained 50lbs. Started drinking Carnation Essentials (instant breakfast) every morning to get better nutrition into me. The milk chocolate one is yummy!
  • Yes! I had a m/c in October at 10 weeks. I have a very healthy 3yo DS. I long for the day when I don't have to guess if what I'm feeling is kicks or gas bubbles. I also can't wait for the anatomy scan so I can see that all is well in there. We just have to keep telling ourselves that today we're pregnant and be happy for that. 
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    PGAL~natural miscarriage oct2010 at 10w
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