Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

Sleep Deprived Mom!!!

For three months I have been trying to get my 16 month old to sleep through the night. Sometimes we have good days and he'll sleep from 9pm to 6am. However, than we get a ton of bad days where he'll go to sleep at 9pm wake up 12 am scream like a banshee and than go back to sleep.  I've tried almost everything, night routines, letting him cry it out (he cries so hard though he chokes), even tried putting music on and no dice.  I even did what the doctor asked and stop feeding him but all he does is scream REALLY REALLY REALLY bad for hours and hours! I live in an apartment building so you can imagine my neighboring tenants are not very happy and I'm afraid they think other things :( I am desparate and dont know what else to do here. I haven't had 8 hours of sleep in I dont know how long. Anyone have any suggestions, ideas, or do you think that maybe my little boy has a sleep problem?

Desparate Mom in New Jersey :(

Re: Sleep Deprived Mom!!!

  • My DS is 16months old as well and he has never STTN. I think he did like 2 times randomly. He was really really tired both times. He wakes up two times a night to nurse. He does the same thing as your DS if we try to let him CIO. Sorry I have no answer or suggestions because nothing has worked for us. I just want to let you know that I know how you feel. I haven't slept a full night for about 1 1/2 yrs now  =(    Good Luck. Please F/U post if you find something that works.
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  • My DS has the same issues, and has only STTN a handful of times.  I am considering completely child proofing his room and transitioning to a mattress on his floor instead of the crib so I can try Dr.Jay Gordon's night weaning in hopes that maybe he will stop getting up if I night wean. 

    I think the basic idea is that you nurse/feed for a short amount of time and then lay down with him to comfort him, and don't feed again until he has slept. After however many nights you just go in and pat/rub/cuddle to get them back to sleep (no feeding), and then however many more nights you just go in and pat/rub without picking up, and progress to just going in and talking/touching and they go right back to sleep. Here  is the link, because I know that sounds confusing.  (scroll down to where it says "the first three nights")

    I know some people that used it and had a lot of success.  It is meant to be used as a night weaning process for people who have a "family bed," but I have a friend that used it with success just by using a floor bed in the baby's room and sneaking out when baby calmed down. 

    I think some babies just don't respond to CIO, and my baby is one of those! Here is an article that I read and really liked about why that is. It helped me understand that despite the advice to just let him cry for hours until he learns to go to sleep or to just stop feeding him at night, that just wouldn't work for my babe! http://www.askmoxie.org/2006/06/babies_and_cio.html

    Sorry so long but HTH...

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  • Have you read Dr. Weissbluth's book (Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child) and/or blog? We had to let DS cry for 2 hours one night to get him to STTN. We did it at around 9 months. The first night was 2 hours, the second through fourth there was crying but I can't even remember how much. It was horrible, but bless my son's soul, he has only had one night waking since (and in our house 4am seems to be morning for my son, so take that for what it's worth). The one thing I can suggest from having researched baby sleep a TON is that your LOs bedtime is probably way too late and a cause of some of the sleep issues. We tried to get DS to STTN from about 12 weeks until we totally stopped night feeding at 9 months (we did not have him CIO every night for 6 months or anything though). At 12 weeks we had major, major sleep problems and hired Dream Team Baby - I'm in CT, they are based in NYC, and they will go to NJ. It was pricey, and we don't love them, but they did drastically improve our situation.
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