I'm new to this board. My story is short. I had a c-section with my son, who's my first, in December 2008 because he was "too big" and my doctors would not let me go more than 5 days past my due date and would not induce labor because they felt he was too big. I never felt a contraction and never went into labor. They would not even strip my membranes. They kept taking ultrasounds and telling me he was huge and 10+lbs and I couldn't deliver him vaginally. He was 8lbs 6 oz when born. I was never given the chance.
But I was talking with my MIL about a week ago and mentioned I wanted to VBAC. She got all preachy and basically equated me wanting to VBAC to me putting my child in danger. She said the baby's health is all that matters, that I shouldn't push having a VBAC, that maybe it's all for the best to just get a repeat c-section ect. I didn't want to get into a big argument so I just nodded and said nothing. I felt really hurt and unsupported though.
Then one of my pregnant friends said something basically along the same lines. And made fun of me for going to an ICAN meeting. My sister, who is also pregnant (and had a c-section with her first) was saying stuff along the same lines and said she doesn't really care if she VBACs or not and that all she wants is a healthy baby.
Now why do I get the feeling that they're all insinuating that I would rather VBAC than have a healthy baby??? Why is it either having a healthy baby or VABC? Can't it be both? uhhh. And they're saying this to me, who lost twins at 15 weeks pregnant earlier this year....like I don't know how important having a healthy baby is, like I would risk my babys health in any way. I am just upset that that's how people around me are viewing the whole VBAC thing. Like it's a SELFISH need of mine and I'm not thinking of the babys health. Since when is delivering a baby through your vagina selfish???
Is it just me or are other people getting this kind of reaction from friends and family?