Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

Mom's with older toddlers (close to 2 yrs)

How do you deal with blantant disregard of your requests?  DS loves to jump.  LOVES.  Unfortunately, we live in a 2nd floor apartment and our downstairs neighbor is BSC and hates us because he is an active boy who runs around.  Last night, he was jumping around and DH and I both told him to stop.  We tried to distract him.  Every damn time, he got a sly little smile on his face and jumped harder.  I was thisclose to completely losing my temper with him. 

How do you deal with this type of behavior?  I had a copy of the Happiest Toddler on the Block, but he got ahold of it, so I think it is only semi-readable at this point.  LOL

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Re: Mom's with older toddlers (close to 2 yrs)

  • Time outs work well in our house.  1 minute on the bottom step leading to upstairs. Actually at this point all I have to say is " you do x again and you'll need to have a time out" and she generally stops.
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  • For us, we simply end the action. For example, If she is jumping and she doesn't respect us when we ask her to stop, then we pick her up and sit her down ourselves. If she is pouring her milk out all over the place after we tell her Stop, NO, then we take the sippy cup away. Does that make sense?
  • Will is in developmental therapy right now, and his therapist told us the best thing to do at this age is, "If you do not stop [insert bad activity here] right now, you are going to get a time out."

    It took a few times for him to realize what we really meant by that, but now it totally works for behavior modification.

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  • image hersheykiss:
    For us, we simply end the action. For example, If she is jumping and she doesn't respect us when we ask her to stop, then we pick her up and sit her down ourselves. If she is pouring her milk out all over the place after we tell her Stop, NO, then we take the sippy cup away. Does that make sense?

    Yes, but how many times do you need to do that?  We repeatedly picked him up and but him on the couch.  Repeatedly tried to offer alternative activies.  See what I mean?  It was about 10 mintues worth of that going on (and the noise of the jumping) that had me so close to just screaming at him.  I felt awful about it too, but so freaking helpless. 

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  • Time outs. One or two minutes, they ARE old enough to realize they did something wrong and are being punished for it.
  • My DD is pretty stubborn too, all the way down to the smarta$$ smile and crooked eyebrows.  The only punishment she responds to is sitting in the corner.  Of course at this age you have to hold them there.  I don't do it for long but, long enough for her to get the point.  I also count to 3 before I do this.  You have to be consistent though, when you get to 3 do it no matter what.  Don't recount, "no 2 and a halfs", etc.  Now, most of the time, when I get to 2 she listens to what I'm telling her.  It's really a matter of trying different punishments and figuring out which one they hate the most.  All children are different.  I am pro - spanking IF it works.  It doesn't with mine, she hits back.  She also has a fave stuffed animal that I will put up for 10 mins.  She really hates that. It is important to remember that you are doing both you and your child a favor by making him listen.  Even if the punishment seems harsh, in the long run it is well worth it.  It's better to start at this age rather than waiting till they start school and get sent home because they won't listen.  Good Luck.
  • image weelass24:

    image hersheykiss:
    For us, we simply end the action. For example, If she is jumping and she doesn't respect us when we ask her to stop, then we pick her up and sit her down ourselves. If she is pouring her milk out all over the place after we tell her Stop, NO, then we take the sippy cup away. Does that make sense?

    Yes, but how many times do you need to do that?  We repeatedly picked him up and but him on the couch.  Repeatedly tried to offer alternative activies.  See what I mean?  It was about 10 mintues worth of that going on (and the noise of the jumping) that had me so close to just screaming at him.  I felt awful about it too, but so freaking helpless. 

    Be persistent and use the corner on the floor or near gated steps. The couch is bouncy and fun and usually faces the TV... Not exactly a punishment site.
  • image katekirschner:
    Time outs. One or two minutes, they ARE old enough to realize they did something wrong and are being punished for it.

    This.  It didn't click with my almost 3 year old until this past September (he was 2 years, 8 months).  We found we had to take him to his bedroom and gate him in for a few minutes.  That was the only thing that got his attention.  It's been smooth sailing with discipline ever since.  

    I was convinced I had the most stubborn toddler alive up until that point, however.

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  • There is also a book called "The Strong Willed Child".  I have not read it yet but, have heard rave reviews.  It might be worth a trip to the library.  I need to do it myself.
  • DD likes to climp up on the coffee table and stand on it.  I tell her no and usually just looks at me and smiles.  I grab her and pull her down and she usually does it again.  I usually have to bring her to her room for her to stop doing it.  I don't think she sees at as a time out, but I think I'm going to be more clear with her about it. 

  • We have used timeouts for a few times.  First couple of times he does exactly what I've told him not to do (it was hitting the dogs one time) I held him in my arms on the couch for a minute or two.  If he kept it up, I put him in the crib and shut the door for a minute or two.  It worked.
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