Babies: 3 - 6 Months

Do parents/in laws help out money wise? ($, gifts for baby, etc?)

just wondering if your parents have been helping out by either giving $ to buy LO things, buying things for LO themselves, etc? 
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Re: Do parents/in laws help out money wise? ($, gifts for baby, etc?)

  • My FIL gave us a nice little nest egg for LO when we first found out we were prego and my family is often buying little things for her here and there like clothes and such. But as far as diapers/wipes/necessities and such DH and I take care of that
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  • No, nor would I expect them to.  We got married on our own, bought our house on our own, and take care of LO on our own.

    They do get gifts for her, like for baptism and Christmas.

  • We do mostly everything on our own.  Our MIL is always buying stuff for DD.  She is the first grandchild and she can't seem to help herself.  She is always dropping off clothes. toys, etc.  We don't expect anyone to do anything, but are grateful for the gifts we receive.

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  •  Not really.  MIL buys random stuff that is not age appropriate at all!  We tell her not to, but she doesn't listen.  She did give me $ for DD's baptism dress, although I repeatedly told her not to and tried to give it back.

     

  • image MrsSR:

    No, nor would I expect them to.  We got married on our own, bought our house on our own, and take care of LO on our own.

    They do get gifts for her, like for baptism and Christmas.

    This.

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  • image MrsSR:

    No, nor would I expect them to.  We got married on our own, bought our house on our own, and take care of LO on our own.

    They do get gifts for her, like for baptism and Christmas.

    Mmmhmmm.
  • No, they don't help out.  I'm sure if we needed it they would. 

     

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  • My MIL buys stuff for the girls all the time.  I don't need or expect her to, but she does.  I don't really consider it "helping out" but more of "Hey I saw this cute outfit on sale and picked it up."  That's just her style.
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  • They all buy her gifts and such all the time. She's the first grandchild on my side and second (and only girl) on DH's.

     

    They're helping us out a lot right now with all sorts of stuff, but that's because we're both unemployed and pretty much bleeding money right now. Otherwise, we could handle it all on our own.

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  • We don't rely on their help, no would we ever expect it, but they are very generous. My IL's especially.  Of course we appreciate it, but sometimes they're a little more generous than I am comfortable with--offering to pay private school tuition, for example.
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  • Kylie is very spoiled by both set of grandparents.  She is the 1st on my side so my Mom gets a little too excited when she goes shopping and sees cute things.  I have told her several times that we appreciate everything she does for Kylie but that she does not have to and I do not want her growing up thinking that everytime Nanny comes over she gets a present.  My Mom promises to stop as soon as Kylie knows better but we will see how that goes...

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  • Our families help a lot. Between the two sets of grandparents and some of the Greats, she has a couple $k in her 529 (we contribute monthly as well) and a few hundred in bonds. My mom buys her tons of clothes (she loves this part!) and both families are getting lots for Christmas so we won't be getting her much. I chose to stay home (much to everyone's delight) but it makes money tight, so they are all happy to help with fun stuff (and would regardless). As far as her necessities though we take care of that-diapers, wipes, food. 

    Edit: After reading some of the above I wanted to clarify that we don't ask for anything or really need it. We meet all of DDs needs. Would I buy her 5 dresses for no reason? No, she has them bc of Grandma. And the money in her 529 has been gifted for Baptism and Christmas, we can definitely take care of our family and do quite well on our own :-) 

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  • My parents do.  My mom buys almost everything for DD and my dad has set up a nice little savings account for her.  DH's parents-- not so much.
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  • My mom will help out every now and then with little things: i.e. a sleeper, a couple of cans of formula, etc...

    We never ask for the help, but we do appreciate it.

    Her and my dad also bought our crib, but that was our shower gift...

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  • No way!!

    My grandmom buys outfits CONSTANTLY because she can't help herself, but we have enough clothes for them on oue own.  She often buys wipes or diapers from Costco and refuses to ler us pay her for it but we don't need the help - she just enjoys doing things for her great grandbabies!

  • If you count free babysitting.... HELL YES! lol My dad LOVES buying/giving groceries so he does that once every couple of months even though I tell him not too... He is one of those bargain shoppers and buys a lot of food when it is on sale. (He seems to forget that all of his kids have moved out and it is just him and my mom). MIL and my mom are always buying DS stuff. DS is the first grandson for my parents (my niece is 9 mo.) and he is the only grand kid with in 1700 MIl for MIL and FIL so he gets pretty spoiled. We don't ask for the help, but it is there if needed.
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  • My mom gave us generous gifts for the shower (crib and 3 months of diaper service) but other than those gifts, we do all the daily needs on our own. I did inherit $30k from the sale of my deceased grandparent's home and that went towards new windows, siding, and electrical for our fixer upper, but the baby's needs are all met through our regular income. The ILs aren't as generous monetarily, but they offer to babysit all the time.

    A 7/2010 - 9 pounds 1 oz, 22 in

    T 3/2012 - 11 pounds, 22 in

      

  • No money, and not really very many gifts. Neither of us were raised with much materialistically though....

    Recently we went to visit my family in Missouri for Thanksgiving and for my family to meet DD for the very first time.  My mom presented her with a quilt that she hand-made. :)   My parents also gave us small gifts for my baby shower, and sent us home with a Christmas present for DD. That's it. (And that's cool with us.)

    IL's have given DD a bouncey seat, our monitor, and MIL said she bought her a couple outfits. I believe they are also sending a Christmas gift. That's it from them. Again, we're cool with it.

    We just don't  have the type of parents who shell out gifts a lot. But, they do give Maddie a lot of love. :)

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  • My father helped us for three months when DH lost his job in mid July. But once back on our feet it was not necessary. They do buy LO little gifts here and there.

    DH's parents don't do anything.

  • image scoutkate:
    We don't rely on their help, no would we ever expect it, but they are very generous. My IL's especially.  Of course we appreciate it, but sometimes they're a little more generous than I am comfortable with--offering to pay private school tuition, for example.
    This is the same for us. Right down to the point of my ILs being a bit more generous than I am confortable with. But, I know they are doing it out of love for their only child and only grandchild.
  • Yep. Not in giving money, but in small gifts, especially sale items.  My parents did offer to pay for a private room in the hosp. after I started having panic attacks from being cooped up, but insurance covered it. LO is the first grandbaby for my parents so they will often pick up onsies, or cute pants outfits off the sale racks. They also bought her Christmas dress, it was important to my mom that she get to since we aren't doing the baptism thing. We live where it is cold (not really) in California, so both sides have given us blankets, fleece snowsuits, hats recently. Everything gets a thank you card within a week, and if we go somewhere or if anyone comes to visit I make sure their outfit they sent is clean and on top in the drawer so they can dress LO in it. Both grandmas love to dress LO if they come to visit.
  • Not directly. They gave DS $20 in his Halloween card (which we put in DS's savings acct), and asked us what we would need for him as a Christmas present--and they'll probably get clothing,  formula and feeding supplies. So we get assistance, but it's connected with holidays or events. I believe if things were ever really tight they'd be happy to help out, but DH and I know they need to keep their own funds for retirement, etc.
    ~Mary & Mike~
    August 18, 2007

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  • image MrsSR:

    No, nor would I expect them to.  We got married on our own, bought our house on our own, and take care of LO on our own.

    They do get gifts for her, like for baptism and Christmas.

    Yup.  My parents occasionally buy him a cute outfit and I'm sure will have some presents for him at Christmas, but we take care of all his needs.  I like it this way! 

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  • My parents buy clothes/ special occasion outfits because they want to.  We got the glider as a baby present from them.  We don't really need the help.  They do provide more for DS's cousin and we are fine with that.
  • My mom definitely helps us since she takes care of LO twice a week!  She will occasionally buy us formula but I think thats because she feels so bad that I'm still so upset that I can't BF!  She also gives us about $200.00 a month to help defray the costs of a babysitter for LO once a week.  This was an unexpected boon to us as we had anticipated paying for a sitter ourselves but mom was adament.  I don't love that she helps so much but I won't deny that it makes our lives a lot easier.  Both DH and I work full time but money is always tights since both he and I have tremendous student loan debt.  I wish we could do it all on our own but thats not always an option these days.
  • I think my parents help us tremendously by being our go-to babysitters. They're the only ones who have watched DD really.

    They also buy her things that they want her to have at their house, though they don't have to, and my mom bought a carseat for her car so we don't have to switch cars regularly. That said, it was technically her baptism gift to DD.

    My ILs have always been more of the $$ type. Before MIL passed, she bought all of DD's furniture. It made her happy to know DD would have a big gift from her that would last a long time. Because of MIL, DD's 529 is also well taken care of.

    FIL gives her big cash gifts for special events, so that $$ goes into her savings account. She will really appreciate it someday. 

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  • My MIL won't stop buying my DD clothes and toys.  My own mother buys her diapers.  I have not had to buy even one diaper for my own daughter yet!  I certainly don't ask or expect these things, they both just do it on their own free will.  I've told them to stop but neither one will listen to me.  I'll take it!

     

     

  • My mom buys gifts for all the occasions, but she lives a few states away, so the drop-by-with-random-stuff-deal doesn't happen with her.  She did sock away some cash in an account to jump start her college/wedding/first house down payment fund that DH and I also contricute to.  MIL buys stuff at yard sales to keep at her house for when DD spends time there.  Thing is, she's not allowed to watch DD.  I think she does it to guilt us or to hold out hope we'll change our minds!  FIL lives a couple hours away and does well to take care of his own needs.  As I type this, it sounds really negative, but actually, I'm happy not to get all sorts of stuff from other people.  I like chossing DD's things and we're blessed enough to be able to afford them, thankfully.

  • We don't live near our parents so we don't get the free babysitting perk but my mom pretty much single handedly clothes the kids.  She's always buying them clothes! My MIL brings clothes whenever she comes to visit too.  But diapers, wipes, food, etc we take care of.  but I RARELY buy my kids clothes. 
  • No and I would not want them too. He is our kid and our responsibility.

    We did get a large ticket item from each side (high chair and carseat) at the shower and I am sure he will get some Christmas presents, but that is it. My sister, on the other hand, is a manager at Old Navy and can not help herself at 50% off clearance time. She buys him bags of stuff for like $10 after her discount. 

     

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