Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Loss of one Twin 24 wks, how to memorialize(Warning ticker and sonogram photo)

We lost one of our twins at 24 weeks. I'm am 29 weeks pregnant with the remaining twin. With every day that passes we have less and less of our angel baby, but we want to memorialize her after the birth of our other daughter. ( We live 8 hours from family , and I have been hospitalized with complications.) 

How would you memorialize the daughter we lost, we were told that if i carry to term there will not be much left of her, so I don't think we would have anything to bury but we don't want to act like nothing happened.

Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.  

Re: Loss of one Twin 24 wks, how to memorialize(Warning ticker and sonogram photo)

  • We just bought one of the Willow Tree ornaments on Amazon and are going to write 9/15/2010-11/29/2010 on the back.

    Or what about having the remaining twin's middle name be the first name of the baby who passed?

  • I'm so sorry for your loss. You could have a Memorial Service for her with close friends and family in a location of your choosing. Maybe plant a tree or plant in remembrace of your daughter. I know this is hard but maybe look into getting a stone for your garden made for her. I hope this helps.
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I like the ornament idea.
  • I just wanted to say I am so sorry for your loss.
    DS Born 10/05/99 DSS Born 7/11/95 BFP 05/11/10 - Missed M/C, D&C 06/23/10 BFP 8/3/2010 - Ectopic, Methotrexate 8/17/10 BFP 1/27/11- Please God let this heart beat strong. Beta1 17dpo-314 Beta2 20dpo-883 Beta3 22dpo-1861 Beta4 25dpo-5918 DS2 Born 10/07/99 "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he shall be given over to the LORD." 1Sam1v24to28.
  • Thank you all for your thoughts and Ideas.  I feel like we should do something more than buying something ( which we will do), but then I don't want to do too much. 

    We still have one child to celebrate, and one child to mourn. The mix of emotions makes it hard to know if I'm wanting to do too much , or not enough.  

  • image Skylarv217:

    Thank you all for your thoughts and Ideas.  I feel like we should do something more than buying something ( which we will do), but then I don't want to do too much. 

    We still have one child to celebrate, and one child to mourn. The mix of emotions makes it hard to know if I'm wanting to do too much , or not enough.  

     

    My sister lost her daughter at 23 weeks. The fsmily bought and planted tree in her honor and are able to watch it grow. Maybe you could do something like that. I am so sorry for your loss. 


    miscarriage - 01/04/2010
    "Dear Lord, I would have loved to have held my baby on my lap and tell him about you, but since I didn't get the chance, would you please hold him on your lap and tell him about me?"
    BFP - 3/2/2010 HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! stick-baby-stick! DS born 10/29/10 at 38 weeks.
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. Sorry for being a lurker. I have a few ideas. There may be enough of your daughter left to cremate her - you may have her placenta or part of her teeny body. Maybe you could put the ashes into a locket or a ring. You could also go the route of the tattoo. I think the jewelery idea is so beautiful and maybe your daughter could inherit it to remember her sister.

    Anyway, here's a link: http://www.ashestoashes.com/cremation-jewelry.htm

    And I loved this one: 

    image 

    I also loved the hearts they had on that site. 

     Here's another link, I really loved the angel pendant: http://www.perfectmemorials.com/angel-cremation-jewelry-c-361.html

    image

    What I love about these is that you don't have to have a lot of remains. You could also put in hair or memorial flowers. 

     

    Anyway, I hope you find a way that you love with which to remember your little baby. My sincerest condolences. 

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  • Warning, DS pics.....

     

     

     I think there isn't anything you could do that would be "too much". I like the idea of a necklace which can hold even the smallest amount of ashes. That would place her oh so close to your heart.

  • I am so sorry for your loss.  I lost my DD's fraternal twin at 21 weeks, and my MFM said that it takes the body about 6 weeks to recognize the loss.  Thats exactly how long it took before my DD was born.  The Dr.'s told me the same thing as you, that so much time had passed it wouldn't even look like a baby.  I had weekly u/s to monitor both babies and I couldn't bring myself to look at the screen when they checked on Baby A.  When I delivered I didn't look at Baby A either.  We had her cremated and have the ash's with us.  I bought an ornament at Hallmark to remember her by- it looks like a shell with a fake pearl in it, and it has a dangling charm with the year.  I wrote her name inside too.  Just like the pp suggested, I changed the middle name that we had in mind for DD and went with her sisters middle name instead to help memorialize her as well.

    I will share some advice with you though- I received both a Death and Birth certificate from the hospital, I wasn't prepared for that.  It wasn't until I read both that I realized 4 min. had passed between delivering them, and on the Birth Certificate it listed DD as a twin.  Believe me, it is very weird knowing she was supposed to be a twin, and having reminders all the time.  HUGS to you and I hope you can carry to full term!

    Hypothyroid since 2006-Cycle #25-IUI #4 with Gonal F/Ovidrel/Progesterone=BFP/1st u/s=TWINS!*Twin A-Hannah lost @21w3d, Twin B-born at 27w3d due to PTL weighing 2 lbs!
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  • I am so sorry for your loss, and I can't even begin to imagine what you are feeling and going through. I hope the remainder of your pregnancy with your LO is uncomplicated. I like the middle-name idea. Again, I am so sorry for what you are going through. :::hugs:::

    My Little Man, Cael Matthew
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