Trouble TTC

anyone else bitter?

I just finished my last round of 150mg clomid last night...I do not ovulate on 50 or 100. I have lost enough weight for AF to return on its own, which is a big step.

Like many of you, I really want to start my family...and as the first born I was looking foward to the day I make my parents first time grandparents...I mean, on downtime at work I would think of ways to tell my parents that they are going to be grandparents (even though I am not preggers yet). I have two younger brothers who I thought wouldn't accidentally beat me to the punch line....well I was really freakin wrong about that. My youngest brother (17) knocked up his new gf after she told him that she ran out of pills but it would still work up to a week.

Now, I am very bitter. VERY very bitter. Now I just need to know I am not the only one out there that is going through this.

 P.S. I hope clomid works this time.

Re: anyone else bitter?

  • I just wanted to say Good luck from a fellow Minnesotan

    TTC since 2010

    lots of IUIs and 1 IVF all BFNs

    FET currently on hold

    photo guiness-1.jpg

  • I am right there with you. I haven't been on this journey for very long, but I just feel like it is SOOOO easy for everyone else, and I don't foresee any end in sight. I can definitely empathize with you! I tend to obsess, and it doesn't help when it seems like everyone I know is either KU, or will be before I am. I had a breakdown after I learned that the Clomid didn't work again. Hang in there!
    TTC since 5/2010


    Diagnosed PCOS 8/2010

    Cycle 1-3 Clomid= No O

    Cycle 4 Clomid (200mg AND 250mg) 3/2/2011- BFN

    2.5mg, 5mg, AND 7.5mg Femara 5/22/2011- BFN

    Femara + Menopur + IUI 7/1/2011= BFP!!!

    Beta 1, 12dpiui=49, Beta 2, 15dpiui=153!!!

    Lauren Harper born April 2, 2012!


    BE8E6BC0-BBB7-400F-84A5-0A95BE3650FA-68284-00005997A1439B2F


    imageTiny Giraffe Gif - Tiny Giraffe




    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker



    PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
  • I'm trying not to be, but it is hard.  My husband and I are photographers and Sunday we have to take maternity photos of his 19 yr old, unwed neice Indifferent

     P.S. Hope the clomid works for you this time.  {{{hugs}}}


    Diagnosed PCOS 2/07, TTC #1 since 8/09
    11/10 - Clomid Round 1 = BFN
    12/10 - Clomid Round 2 = BFN
    1/11 - Voluntary Break = BFN (duh)
    2/11 - Clomid Round 3 = BFN
    3/11 - Femara + IUI = BFP * Beta#1=56 * Beta#2=266
    *Cautiously expecting baby girls on November 28, 2011*
    imageimage
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Thank you for the support so far.

    I know it's hard not to be bitter...I'm honestly just glad that I am not the only one. TTC is a long tough and sometimes messed up road. What sucks even more is that I was starting to get over other ppl getting pregnant before me (and without clomid) and then...what I found out yesterday totally screwed up that progress.

    For those of you TTC, lots of baby dust to you. For those with lil' ones, you are so lucky :)

     

  • image HDaire2128:

    My youngest brother (17) knocked up his new gf after she told him that she ran out of pills but it would still work up to a week.

    Fertility is wasted on the stupid.

    It is difficult not to be bitter about something like this. But remember, her getting pregnant is not going to effect your chance of getting pregnant (though I can understand you wanted to give your parents their first grandchild).

    Good luck to you!

    Baby Girl! photo photo-3.jpgphoto 03_Portraits_0537.jpg
    BabyFetus Ticker 

  • I have 2 sisters and I am in the middle my older sister has to beautiful girls. Luckily my little sister isn't planning on having babies any time soo but on DH's side he is the only one who hasn't had kids yet. His sisters and all his cousins have babies and I feel bad form him cause ppl keep asking. It does really suck. You are not alone.

  • Yay for other MN ladies on this board!  (but boo for today's snow and the drive home in a bit).

     I think it's natural to feel jealous of other people who are pregnant/have children.  Especially when it was an oops or if the pregnancy happened within a couple months of trying.  I think you'll find that everyone on this board has felt that way at some point or another.  Best of luck to you.

    image
    image


    TTC Since 8/2009


    1/2011 lap to remove blocked right tube and adhesions, left tube looks good!


    IUI #1 6/2011 - BFN


    Forced breaks July - Sept: cysts and eggs on wrong side


    IUI#2 10/2011 - BFN

    IUI#3 11/2011 - BFN

    IUI#4 w/ injects 2/2012 - BFFN

    IVF #1 5/2012 - cancelled due to low response

    IVF #1.2 6/2012 - ER 6/25, ET 6/30 - BFN

    FET #1 8/2012 - BFP!!!


    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • You are definitely not alone. It stings every time I hear someone announce their pregnancy. It stings even worse when it's somone who didn't plan it and is not emotionally ready for it.

    I find the boards help alot. It definitely helps to talk to ladies going through the same things. I feel less "broken" somehow.

    And I whole heartedly agree with Allie, it's good to remember that other women's BFP's do not have any bearing on whether or not we'll get one.  Difficult, but good to remember none the less.

    Good luck on this clomid cycle.  Hopefully the increase in dosage does the trick!

    image

    After 3 years and 1 IUI, our miracle is here!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Honetsly, I'm not a fan of the word "bitter".  I think that it gets used a lot in reference to the attitude of women who are struggling with infertility and it just rubs me the wrong way.  Kind of like when a man and women do the same thing in a situation but the man is called assertive and the woman is called a biitch.  I'm not sure if that makes sense.

    I do get sad when others announce their pregnancies, particularly people who didn't even have to try, but I think I have felt that way since the first month.  If anything, the length of time we've been TTC has helped me work through my jealousy and come up with coping mechanisms to deal with other's BFPs.

    I hope that the increased Clomid dose works for you. :)

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
    Dx w/PCOS in 1997, TTC #1 from 1/09-7/11
    after multiple rounds of clomid, femara and injectables,
    I got pregnant with twins on IVF #1. Twin girls born at 36 weeks 2/24/2012
  • image allie76:

    Fertility is wasted on the stupid.

    It is difficult not to be bitter about something like this. But remember, her getting pregnant is not going to effect your chance of getting pregnant (though I can understand you wanted to give your parents their first grandchild).

    Good luck to you!

    THIS!  Allie - well said.

    I try like h_ll not to be "bitter"... Instead I get motivated... I keep reminding myself, in the midst of tears... "When I do get pregnant, I'm seriously going to try my hardest to be the best mother ever."  I just try to get myself all psyched up...  :-) 

    Best of luck to you.

    image



    1 Ruptured Ectopic m/c,
    1 Chemical Pregnancy m/c,
    2 rounds of Clomid,
    2 rounds of IUI,
    1 miracle BFP while waiting to start IVF!

    ~High five to my eBFF Chloe!~

  • image Ms H13:

    Yay for other MN ladies on this board!  (but boo for today's snow and the drive home in a bit).

     I think it's natural to feel jealous of other people who are pregnant/have children.  Especially when it was an oops or if the pregnancy happened within a couple months of trying.  I think you'll find that everyone on this board has felt that way at some point or another.  Best of luck to you.

    Boo is right.  Not excited at all about driving home

    TTC since 2010

    lots of IUIs and 1 IVF all BFNs

    FET currently on hold

    photo guiness-1.jpg

  • I am beyond bitter. I just found out that I don't ovulate and will be starting clomid soon (or atleast thats Dr's recommendation). Since finding out, two of my friends fell pregnant (one of whom had an abortion just last year). I also work in Human Resources and we have more women out on maternity this year than any other. Why is it so easy for them and not us, I will never know. I fully agree with the person that said fertility is wasted on the stupid. I wish you lots of luck, try to stay positive, or just take some time out away from pregnant people!

     

    TTC since Nov 2010 Clomid Cycle # 1 February 2011 (CD 3-7) Ovulated CD 16 BFN- AF March 6th Took month off for GI Endoscopy Clomid Cyle # 2 April 2011 (CD 3-7) LH :) May 2nd IUI # 1 May 3rd May 16th- BFN and AF Femara Cycle #1 May 18 (CD3-6) Positive Ovulation test CD 12 BFN June 7th Seeing new specialist June 9th
  • I also feel your pain!  As a teacher, it is difficult to deal with many people on a regular basis who should not be parents in the first place.  It is frustrating for it to be so easier for others and so difficult for those of us who so despartely want to be awesome parents.  Hang in there and we are here for you.
    SAIF
  • I'm sorry you're feeling down. Good luck on your next cycle!

    I can't complain but sometimes I still do
    Life's been good to me so far
    Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic
    GL to my twinkie Loveypants and my labor buddy Dlast!
  • I get the bitterness, and I'm with you.  Tonight, I happen to be just downright sad.  And I know I need to get over it, but it's so hard.

    I'm so sorry for you - and for all of us - who want to be parents so badly.  I will probably never understand why we are put through this, but I just know that when the babies do come, we will be the most loving, wonderful parents ever!!!  We must keep focused on that.

    Definitely allow yourself time to be angry, sad, whatever...because I've found the longer you hold those emotions in, the worse the "release" can be. 

    I hate to say "hang in there" because I know that times, you feel as though you are hanging on by the tips of your fingernails, but just know that you are not alone, you have a wonderful support group here - and I hope in your life as well - and that you can come here to vent or talk any time.  So many others are going through what you are and have no doubt had the same thoughts and feelings as you.  I know it has helped me tremendously. 

     Good luck.  And thanks to each of you who have helped me through my worst moments.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    My Furbaby
    image
    My Real Baby

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Definitely. I just feel like everyone from my brother and SIL who can't afford the kids they have to my 18 year old cousin's GF is getting KU. It's just really hard. I've been to a baby shower or first birthday twice a month for the past year!
    image

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Thank you. It was so nice to come home and read all these post...you all helped me calm down (although I'm still bitter as hell). I wish all of us luck...I will keep my fingers crossed for all of us.
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards