Single Parents

Don't know if I should call

I have this feeling that I should call the ex but not really sure why. He hasn't seen Cooper in 8 weeks or asked about him in 7 weeks. 

Every time I am about to call or text I stop and hang up. I think if he really cared or wanted to know about or to see Cooper he could pick up the phone. 

So should I call? What do you do if you ever get this feeling?   

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"There comes a time in life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good. So love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living."

Re: Don't know if I should call

  • I ignore the feeling and let it pass.  Your phone is on and the dial tone works he could call.  HE needs to make the contact you just to allow it to happen.

    I get the overwhelming feeling to call or send photos to ex's family every Christmas but then I have to give myself a date after the holidays to revisit the idea and then I realize that I just avoided extra drama.

    They have an email they can reach me at, they have a phone number to reach me, they could even message me on facebook and they are all on there.  But they don't 4 years later, I don't think they could recognize the children anymore if they passed them on the street or in the mall.

    It's not your job to make him be a supportive and loving father it's your job to hold him accountable for being a financially responsible father.

    That's it.

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  • Do not call. If he cared, he would. It's sad, but you can't make him care.
  • I know I can't make him care or be loving and supportive. I really did think he would grow up when Cooper was born but it lasted a few weeks and then back to his old self, oh well.

    It probably has to do with the holidays and the fact that this is the first one and last Christmas I couldn't wait for this year. And I already bought Cooper's Christmas presents online so I wouldn't have to go to the stores alone.

    The child support is probably the reason he hasn't asked to see him because I filed and he got mad and we finally have our conference scheduled.

    I will not call and just keep enjoying all the time I have with Cooper.

    Thanks! 

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    "There comes a time in life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good. So love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living."
  • Put down the phone.  He knows your number.  He knows how to get ahold of you, whatever you do DO NOT call.

    I went through this a lot at first with SD (when he still had visits at my house).  Why, I'm not sure.  Maybe I wanted to make sure that P wouldn't resent me-IDK.  But I don't ever do that anymore.  Ever.

    Ask yourself this: if you were not living with your child don't you think you would be doing whatever it takes to see them every.single.chance you got?  You'd probably be sleeping on your ex's doorstep.  Seriously.  So why should YOU have to remind HIM to see his child?  That's right, you shouldn't have to. 

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  • Don't call. You can't force someone to be a good father. I gave up trying to force my son's father to have a relationship with him. The only person who is going to get hurt is Cooper. I know it sucks.
  • Amen! I love EVERYTHING you just said right there... you can't force someone to be in your child's life. If he wants to, he will PERIOD
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