Babies: 3 - 6 Months

need some major support: CIO (ferber)

DH and I started ferber tonight. We put him down at 657, and he almost immediately started crying. we did a 3 min interval, the 5 min interval and next is the 8 min. its really difficult and im trying to go on the bump now to keep my mind off the screaming. How bad did your LO yell? DS is screaming SO SO SO sadly and loudly. its a really different/crazy scream. Is this how your LO was? how many intervals did it take the first night?? this is horrible.

Re: need some major support: CIO (ferber)

  • No experience - just sorry that you are going through it.  It must be so hard to listen to your lo cry.  I hope it works for you guys - and quickly too.  My pedi is a ferber sleep specialist and has told us that a few nights of it is all it takes.  We haven't done any sleep training but we're lucky that ds is a good sleeper.

     


    image
  • My friend did this and said to get some wine and hold hands with your hubs.  Her DD cried for 45 min the first night, 10 min the second, and went right to sleep on the third.

    Good luck!
  • image HammyD:

    My friend did this and said to get some wine and hold hands with your hubs.  Her DD cried for 45 min the first night, 10 min the second, and went right to sleep on the third.

    Good luck!

    I couldn't sit there for 45 min and hear them cry.  :(  Even if I knew it was for a greater good.  Good luck. 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Our LO yelled big time (especially once we left the room) but it didn't last too long.  He cried on and off for about 2 hours.  The first night was the worst... but it definitely got better. It was not fun, but we just put on a movie and tried to not listen to it :-/ it sucks, but trust me it'll be worth it when your LO is sleeping better and happier.  Just so you know, our DS woke up smiling the next day and slept 10 hours straight the 2nd day.  =) Good luck!
  • these are pretty encouraging! :) Update: our lo stopped crying after the 3rd time of going in (almost 4th but didnt make it there.) So it was a total of 30 mins. It went by faster than it seems since you get to go in and see your LO, but it was difficult. (it helped that it was really dark and I couldnt see his face.) Ugh, its horrible, I'm really hoping he doesnt wake up for a while so we dont have to do it again so soon. He woke up over 15x last night and thats pretty much been the norm. Hes been sleeping horribly the last few months and at this point we're so sleep deprived and pedi said its time to do this. :(
  • 15x ???? was that a typo???
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    image
    image
  • image jasrun80:
    15x ???? was that a typo???
    LOL!! No, not a type. My DH and I split up the night and he was on duty 930-230 and he was up over 5x for him (I think it was 7) then he was up 5x for me after 230 (plus 3 times after we put him down for bed at 730-930) then I gave up at one point and took him to bed and he was just basically UP every 20 mins or so and we arent even counting that part! Thats how our life has been. It sucks, but we have to do this at this point. Pedi says its not even healthy for DS to be up so much and not have a healthy sleep cycle. (and we are beyond sleep deprived.) 
  • If I were in your shoes I'd be doing it too!  It will be worth it.  Good luck!
    Photobucket

    Bar tab = $156,000, Bus to Foxwoods = $0, Puking in the Stanley Cup = Priceless

  • Oh no!  I've been reading your posts and you were sooooo ready!  It's hard, huh!?  Their cries are totally different.  Post colic or not.  Like everyone says, it will get easier.  But you HAVE to be consistent, otherwise you're dealing with all of this agony in vain because you'll have to do it again.  When we did it for DD I just came up with some mantras that helped me through and one of them was, "I'm letting her cry to get the sleep she needs."  It sounds ridicuolus, but it was so helpful to say out loud when I was having thoughts, like, "but she neeeeeeds me... she's not going to turst me any longer... I'll just pick her up and cuddle her, just this once, it sounds like she needs to burp".  Be strong.  You can do it.  It's for the sake of all of you. 
    just enjoying a snack and the sunshine

    image


    CDM 5k:: 26:01
  • I know how you feel.  We started two nights ago with DD.  Actually, we did sleep training, de-swaddling, and the move from the Rock n Play to the crib all at once.  I wasn't planning on doing it like that, but it's actually worked out so far.

    The first night we put her down around 8 and she cried pretty hysterically right away. I went in at 5 min, 7 min, 10 min, and 12 min.  She fell asleep for maybe a half hour and then it started again.  Eventually it was 10:30 and I nursed her again then put her down.  It took about an hour and a half of me going in to soothe her at longer intervals before she was asleep, but then she slept until 4am. I got up, nursed her, and I only had to go in to soothe her once before she was asleep again.  She slept until 7am.

    Last night I nursed her and put her down around 8. I only went in once at 5 minutes to soothe her before she fell asleep.  She woke up at 3 am to eat, fussed for about 15 min when I left the room and fell back asleep all on her own.  She slept until 8:30am. I can't say how tonight will turn out, but so far she's been sleeping for about an hour after I put her down and soothed her once at 5 min.

    It was definitely hard the first night, but it really seems to be working for us. The first night was by far the worst. Get through that, and it'll get better. Good luck!

  • Oh, and sleep training experts say that between 5.5 months and 7.5 months is the ideal learning time as they are feeling very "secure" in what they can accomplish, therefore you're not hindering their confidence.  Between 4 - 5.5 months is a action/reaction stage and they expect to get results... i.e. they reach for something and expect to grab it, cry and expect mom to come, roll over and expect to be closer to an object.  Once these "skills" are established then the next 2 months are just refinement.  So, in other words, you're doing it at the right time momma!
    just enjoying a snack and the sunshine

    image


    CDM 5k:: 26:01
  • image NewMommy423:
    Oh no!  I've been reading your posts and you were sooooo ready!  It's hard, huh!?  Their cries are totally different.  Post colic or not.  Like everyone says, it will get easier.  But you HAVE to be consistent, otherwise you're dealing with all of this agony in vain because you'll have to do it again.  When we did it for DD I just came up with some mantras that helped me through and one of them was, "I'm letting her cry to get the sleep she needs."  It sounds ridicuolus, but it was so helpful to say out loud when I was having thoughts, like, "but she neeeeeeds me... she's not going to turst me any longer... I'll just pick her up and cuddle her, just this once, it sounds like she needs to burp".  Be strong.  You can do it.  It's for the sake of all of you. 

    thank you- we're up right now since 230/240ish and its so difficult. I told my DH what you said about the saying it outloud and I think that does help. You are so right about thinking about picking them up "just this once" etc. For some reason its SO much worse right now than it was putting him down. I think its bc right now for some reason even in the dark I could see his face and it bothered DH and I so much. This just has to be the worst thing we've done to him, but I know I will feel a lot better once we're done with all this. thanks for the support. :)

  • We have done 3 nights of Ferber!  The first 2 nights were HORRIBLE.  He cried so hard that his voice is now hoarse!  It is the first part of the night that is tough, because I used to put him in his bassinet when he was completely in a deep sleep and now I'm putting him down drowsy but awake.  My pedi really wants me to break the nursing to sleep sleep association which is all he really knows.  He was not a good sleeper and was up 4-8 times a night just to nurse for two minutes to go back to sleep.  Plus, nobody else could put him to bed or help him at night, just me and I don't want that forever! 

    So I was ready for this even though it's the HARDEST Thing ever.  We made progress last night.  It took almost an hour before he fell asleep (soothing him 4 times) but then he fell asleep and slept from 8:30-1:30...I nursed him and put him back down and he slept until 5:00.  This is a HUGE improvement for us...we have moved him to his crib and are trying to reduce the number of times he nurse all at once too.  It's tough but I think it'll pay off for ALL of us in the end!  Keep up with it, I almost gave in on night #2 but DH kept me sane. 

    We are still swaddling LO at night, the pedi said to conitnue because that's his "pacifier" for right now.  We may be deswaddling soon because he got his arms out last night and rolled over to his tummy and slept soundly like that.  But when we try to put him to bed wihtout the swaddle he just CAN'T settle himself down yet.

    Trial and error I guess.  We're all in the same spot!!!!!

Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards