Baby Showers

Is there proper etiquette as to who throws you a shower?

I know for a bridal shower, it's not proper etiquette for the mother-in-law to throw you a shower, but what about a baby shower?  My mother-in-law seems to think there is a rule about this?  But my mother is nagging me about it saying it's ridiculous...

Re: Is there proper etiquette as to who throws you a shower?

  • As long as you or your DH don't throw yourselves a shower, you're fine.
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  • my mom and MIL threw our shower.  no one said anything...


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  • From a traditional standpoint, it "should" be someone other than MIL or mom (or you).  The adherence to that has lightened up quite a bit, a lot of mom's/MIL's throw baby showers now, and as long as it really is about the mom (vs. a 'grandmother's shower' where it's the grandma-to-be's friends) I think it's acceptable. 

  • It's "proper" to not have mom or MIL host it but I think the best ones I've been to were hosted by very excited Grandma's to be!  It's a great way for them to feel involved and share their joy with family and friends too.
  • Every shower I have been to has been thrown by the mom-to-be's best friend. That is how mine is being planned too. My family will be involved but the major aspects are being taken care of by my bf.
  • Traditional etiquette is that it is not thrown by the MIL or mother (or even sister) of the mom-to-be.  Used to always be a cousin or aunt or friend of the mom-to-be.  Things have changed and more and more grandma's are hosting the shower.
  • I really should write a book throwing "proper" etiquette out the window.  My MIL is very much all about the etiquette and my mom says, who cares.  I tend to lean towards my mom...some of this etiquette stuff gets really out of hand.  I agree with PP that as long as you aren't throwing your own baby shower, you're fine.  If someone wants to celebrate you and your little nugget, why should etiquette get in the way of that! : )
  • The etiquette says no direct relatives should throw you a shower (mother, MIL, siblings). My mom's friends have offered to host, but I know that my mom will be main coordinator of this event, and I don't have a heart to tell her to back off since she's very very excited.
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