Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Does DH/SO wake up?

Does your DH/SO wake up when the baby cries?  Mine sleeps through it all the time, I have to wake him up if I need his help.  I'm nervous to ever leave him alone with her because he wouldn't hear her if she was crying and he was sleeping.  Anyone else in this boat?

Re: Does DH/SO wake up?

  • That's rough!  DH is usually the one who gets up with DS in the night at our house.  He's a lighter sleeper than me and beats me to it most the time!
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  • I used to think he didn't. But the other day he told me that a lot of the times he does wake up! He had to go back to work from day 1 so for the most part I did all the waking up in the middle of the night alone! Now my DS just wakes up once a night so it's not so bad!
  • DH never gets up at night, but I don't mind. Since he's the one working and making all the money right now, I don't want him to be tired at work. At least I can take a nap during the day if I'm tired, he can't.
  • DH doesn't hardly ever hear him, but if he does he'll get up and ask if I need anything. But if its just the two of them in the room, DH always wakes up. I think if he knows that he has to wake up, he does, but if he doesn't need to get up, he blocks out the sound.
  • image TCTF:
    DH doesn't hardly ever hear him, but if he does he'll get up and ask if I need anything. But if its just the two of them in the room, DH always wakes up. I think if he knows that he has to wake up, he does, but if he doesn't need to get up, he blocks out the sound.
    This. If he knows it's his turn to wake up he does. He's still on paternity leave so he's been a big help. We are actually all up right now (4am here) because my 3 year old is sick:-(So dh is taking care of him while I'm feeding the baby.
  • Unless it's a bad night (like tonight. Boo), I do all of the night wakings. Since I ebf, there's not a ton he can do anyway...
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  • My little one never really cries at night, she will make noises though. DH doesn't wake up for those. It worries me too.
  • My husband gets up when I get up.  O is STTN, but will wake up normally between 5-6am.  He gets her bottle and get the room ready for me.  If it's after 7am, he'll even start the coffee. 

    I'm sorry your husbnad doesn't wake up.  Have you tried talking to him about it?

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  • I wake up to her fussing before she starts full out crying, DH wakes up to her full out crying after a few minutes.
  • He does not always hear the babies crying, I dont know if its because he is farther away from the door.  But he normally gets up when he hears me get up. Or when I jab him and tell him the babies are crying, lol.

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  • Have yo considered that maybe it just takes him a little longer to wake up?  And that he knows you are taking care of it so he can go back to sleep?  Its sort've reversed in my home because DH typically wakes up easier than I do  and I am breastfeeding so he often has to wake me.  But there is no doubt that I will wake if and when alone.

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  • I just posted this in the above post:

    Ok so I guess I sort of believe by Dh now b/c he claims to hardly ever hear Lo cry at night. I could have hurt him last night he made me so mad!  A little background: DH told me several times he dos not hear LO at night very well. When he does he wont jump right up and get him b/c he waits to see if he settles back down first. The times he doesn't settle, DH claims that I will usually have him by then. Fine, your story sounds legit. Fast forward to last night, LO is crying at 3:45am..I hear him and decide to test DH by laying still like I was still asleep. Finally DH does get up so I casually roll over as if I woke up by DH getting out of bed. He sees and instead of walking to the crib on my side, starts to head out the door saying "I will turn on the bottle warmer for you." WTF! How about walking over to the crib buddy and picking your kid up! Its almost comical and for the most part I dont mind. After all he does work and I have been on leave for 3 months..but still every now and then would be nice! Turn the bottle warmer on..........

  • It depends.  Sometimes he sleeps through and other times he wakes.  If he does wake he always gets him for me and brings him into our room to be fed. 
  • I am a SAHM and I ebf, so dh never has to get up at night.  I keep the volume down on the monitor, but I think he hears her when she cries. He just goes back to sleep though. But I also never hear the alarm clock unless I have a reason to get up by the alarm, which is pretty much never. I think we tune out the things that we don't need to hear. 
  • image jdouglas84:
    DH never gets up at night, but I don't mind. Since he's the one working and making all the money right now, I don't want him to be tired at work. At least I can take a nap during the day if I'm tired, he can't.

    This.  Although we don't sleep in the same room just so DH can get in his 12 hours at work.

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  • My DH rarely hears her cry.  He's told me that I can't go out of town without taking them, because he's afraid that he won't wake up during the night if she needed him.  When he does get up, he's so out of and incoherent that I'll jump up and get her before him.  He trips all over himself when he wakes up in the middle of the night (he's gotten bruises from it).  For the most part, this doesn't bother me.  However, there was one morning when my LO hadn't let me have but a couple hours of sleep the past few nights where I just needed him to get up to calm me down.  Needless to say that didn't happen so I was kind of upset.  What made me more upset was once I got our LO back to sleep, I put her in the sleeper by my side of the bed and went to use the restroom.  When I came back in the room, he was rocking the sleeper like he was really  helping me out.  That's actually what made me the maddest, because she was ALREADY asleep.  Needless to say, I find the story funny now.  Smile
  • He doesn't hear the baby, but oddly, he hears our toddlers if they wake. Maybe because it's out of the ordinary if the older boys wake up, not so much with the baby.
  • We trade off nights getting up with DS.  On DH's nights he gets up with DS and feeds him pumped milk while I sleep.  Every other night I get to sleep :-)
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  • Nope.

    The other night, DH was staying up late, so we put LO to sleep in the swing and I went to the bedroom to get a few hours of good sleep. Around 2:30 am, I heard him crying, and went out to the living room...DH was snoring on the couch and DS was wailing. He didn't hear a darn thing.

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  • This is our house, too! DD co-sleeps with us, so she's in the same room and everything, and if she is full-on screaming, he still sleeps through it. I go back to work on Monday, and he will be watching her on his two days off. I told him he can't ever sleep during the day on those days, because he literally just won't hear her. It worries me, too.
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