Working Moms

Dreading it...

So I go back to work Jan 4th, seems so close now!  I never planned to SAH, I like working and getting in my work clothes, talking to people, etc so I am not dreading work, but I do love my time with LO and cry when I think about being away from him.  I feel like nobody can comfort him like I can and I know that he won't get his little naps on me etc.  I also get irrational fears like he will prefer the nanny over me but my mom tells me I have long since established my relationship with him and he knows who mommy is.  I also worry he will be upset when I am not there all of a sudden.  He is a great baby rarely cries and is just a joy.....does everyone feel this way at first?  Will we both be ok...  
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Re: Dreading it...

  • I found thinking about returning to work while on leave was worse then actually returning to work. The day I returned there were a few tears as I left in the morning, but overall it has gone very well. I still have my moments, but I have realized it is 100% about my attitude. I focus on the positive parts of being a working mom and make the most of my time off that I do have with my DS.  
  • First of all: your siggy pics are SOOOO cute!

    I have been back to work for a month and a week and am doing  a nanny share with our neighbor's DS. I spent the last week before I went back to work on the verge of tears - and DS was NOT an easy baby for most of my Mat. leave. One thing that was helpful for me was I came in for two mornings the week before I returned - it helped me plow through my inbox (1,400 messages, no exaggeration) and it gave the nanny and DS some time to get to know each other. That significantly reduced my stress level regarding work itself.

    I think that worry about the nanny is so common, it's almost impossible NOT to feel that way. And after all, you do want your LO to love the nanny and vice versa - you WANT him to be happy about who he is with all day. But I have to say I have seen no sign that DS doesn't know I'm his mommy - well, not that he knows what a mommy is exactly, but I dont' think the nanny has replaced me in any way. Of course, still being his food source probably helps with that, but even if you are bottle feeding, your mom is right, he knows who you are.

    It will definitely be an adjustment for both of you and there will be days that you really hate to have to go to work. I have the type of job that isn't just 9 to 5, and I find I am more resentful than I was before when work intrudes on my weekends or evenings. I'm not sure whether I'll stay in my current job long term or try to find one that is less intrusive into my personal time. But I find that after being back for a while I'm back in the swing of things and am really glad I'm working.

    I told my husband that I would give it three months and if I was miserable after three months we would re-look at whether it would be feasible for me to stay home. You might want to think of it that way. Someone also gave me the good advice that I should look at everything as an experiment, and if stuff isn't working out I can always change it.


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  • Oh gosh yes!  But, after almost a year and a half at work and with a nanny, I am so proud and happy with my DD's development.  She's happy having someone with her during the day that is perfectly happy reading, singing and playing all day long (not something I do very well).  I'm happy knowing she's doing well.  It will take a while to adjust to those feelings.  You've got to remember that it took 9 months to make your will take about a year for all those hormones to rebalance and your body to get back to normal (especially if you're still BF'ing).  You will both be just fine and speaking from experience--your LO will never mistake his/her Mom for anyone else.  To help with the transition for you and him, you might have the nanny come in for half days for a week or two before you go back.  Hope this helps and good luck.  You'll be great (at work and at being a mom)!
  • Yes, you will both be fine.  But it is a tough transition.  Usually much harder on mommy than baby.  Good luck and give yourself some treats for heading back to work (a new work bag, a Starbucks giftcard, etc.).  
  • I feel ya. I have been off for  3 1/2 months and go back on the 4th too.  I look forward to feeling another sense of accomplishment, getting dressed, etc. schedule will be (and always has been, now just insert LO).

    at gym between 0430-0500, to work by 0800-I normally do 10 hr days, but I'm only going to do 8 for a while, home around 600-630, LO goes to bed at 8 :(

    Daddy gets morning duty while I'm at gym for their bonding and I do night duty.  Hardly seems right I'll see my kid for like 2 hrs a day. 

    I will probably go part time after 6 mnths to a year.

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