2nd Trimester

Depressed anyone?

After going through other posts trying to see if anyone feels how I have been feeling, I think I may be alone in this.

I have been feeling so depressed. I don't know what it is. Sometimes I don't feel excited about the baby. Maybe I will once we find out what it is but people ask me, "aren't you excited?" in my mind I say no, not yet. I want to be happy and excited but I'm just not which in turn makes me feel worse. I am having the hardest time with the change in my body. I don't feel like myself. What if I never get excited? I am terrified that I won't be happy once the baby comes. Maybe I am just terrified all around. Maybe its just these hormones. 

Re: Depressed anyone?

  • You aren't alone. There was a post a couple of days ago talking about it.
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  • How far along are you? I am sorry you are feeling this way. I am sure it has a lot to do with hormones. Plus depending on how far along you are you may get more excited the more milestones you hit. If you are feeling depressed it is good to talk about it. It will make you feel better.
  • Dont worry yes im excited about having a baby..

    but im constantly depressed about how it is affecting my body..

    im depressed about wether or not im going to be a good mother...

    I feel so bad because its out of wedlock.. and i promised my self that i would be married before i have a kid..

    so dont worry.. your not the only one..

    if you want you can pm me anytime.. ill gladly help you out as much as i can

  • i was def depressed the first like 15 or 16 weeks...and i still fight it a bit now...i do find that coming on here and reading the posts and actually posting has made me get a little more excited about being pregnant and having a baby...now that i'm getting further along and i haven't been AS sick, i feel alot happier about it.  I even cleaned the apartment the past 2 days and MADE MYSELF A HOT BREAKFAST!  for the first time since being preggo!  good luck :(  I hope things get way better for you!
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  • How far along are you?   In both of the books that I have it says that depression, uncertainty and mixed feelings about the pg is very normal and quite common. 

    I had bouts in the beginning weeks - pretty much the whole 1st tri - where I wasn't sure if this is what I really wanted.  We were "trying" but it happened much faster than we thought it would so I was a little unprepared for how quickly our lifestyle changed.

    I would talk to your Dr and see if he/she suggests anything but know that the way you are feeling is normal and yes, you will get excited as you go along and you will 100% love your LO when it arrives.

    Me-38, DH - 48 | DD born 3/17/10 | BFP 4/29/11 - M/C 5/31/11 Blighted Ovum | BFP 12/18/11 CP - 12/27/11 | Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I have pretty bad anxiety and depression right now too, i've heard that if you are already predisposed to it, hormones can bring it on during pregnancy...i'm sure you'll get excited!!  but i do feel your pain, hope it gets better for you
  • i feel pretty good most days, but i certainly have bouts of feeling blue.  i'm on anti-depressants/anti-anxiety meds though (yes, during pregnancy) because i have a history of mood "issues" and really struggled with post-partum depression and anxiety after my daughter was born.  

    i am really glad you're paying attention to your moods and talking about it.  i REALLY believe strongly that many people brush off these sorts of feelings during pregnancy, and that it is SO important to have a good support system of people who will really listen to you and help you.  

    the hormones are wicked, wicked little devils.  changes in your body, a HUGE life change coming up, a lot of fear of the unknown, mood swings etc.  it's not always easy, and it's okay to admit that it's not easy.  anyone who tells you otherwise needs to shut their piehole.  

    for me, i know that exercise and fresh air are critical to my mental well-being, even more so when i'm pregnant.  find things that make you feel good, and do them.  talk to people who will support you, and make sure your doctor is aware of your feelings.  just in case.   

  • image bb80:
    I have pretty bad anxiety and depression right now too, i've heard that if you are already predisposed to it, hormones can bring it on during pregnancy...i'm sure you'll get excited!!  but i do feel your pain, hope it gets better for you

    This.

    Hormones do terrible, awful things to good, normal people. Have you struggled with depression or anxiety in the past? If so, talk to you doctor. Let him/her know what's going on with you. Even if you choose not to treat your symptoms or anything, having the doctor and those closest to you (like DH, your mom, your best friend...someone who talks to you often) be aware of the situation can go a long way toward helping you recover, and keeping Post-Partum depression from taking away from the love and happiness you will feel when that little bundle gets here. :)

    And, if you need anything.. PM me. I understand. I promise. :) A lot of us on the boards do, and no one will ever judge you for not wanting to feel alone.

  • I was taking anxiety/anitdepressant meds before I got pregnant but got off them prior to us starting to try to get pregnant. So it's nice to here that I'm not going crazy and not alone. I def hope this is normal and that I get better as the weeks pass. 

     

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  • I totally feel the same. Even DH is excited and I'm just blah. I'm so scared of this baby. I want to push the pause button.
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  • I posted about the same thing the other day (Tuesday the 10th). I was pretending to be happy when I'm not, and I've reached a point that I can't lie to myself anymore. This baby was a surprise to us so I missed the 4.5 months of mentally getting used to the bump showing up. It's hit me kind of hard because I recently moved and fiance's in another city, family far enough away that I can't just show up for comfort and advice and I left all my friends behind so no shoulders to cry on.

    The ladies mentioned that some depression now could turn into PPD later so I plan on talking to the doctor tomorrow (he's supposed to call about test results) about the way I'm feeling. It's already helped a bit to talk to fiance about it honestly as I was hiding my depressed feelings from him. He calls everyday now (sometimes more than once) and we find some reason in my day so far to be happy or excited about and focus on that.

    Please feel free to message me anytime, I'm mostly online in the evenings. I completely understand what your feeling at the moment.

  • I totally understand how you feel.  I haven't been excited either.  But, as I get further along I get glimmers of excitment (and outright terror of being a mother). 

    That said, don't put too much pressure on yourself to be over the moon excited and happy.  As everyone has said, hormones are powerful drugs.  They really mess with you.  Rather than keep it inside, this is the best time to deal with them.   

    It's great that you are aware of your feelings.  And don't be hesitant to talk to your doctor about them.  Although I've never suffered from depression (or at least have never been diagnosed), I have family history with it.  DH thought I was joking when I told him he needed to educate himself on post-partum depression.  Your SO is the best person to recognize it in you (if it gets to that).  And from what I've been reading, it is also normal to not be over the moon happy and excited even after your LO arrives and you are adjusting to the changes. 

    Also  

  • I think my feelings about this pregnancy have more to do w/feeling overwhelmed with the idea of twins.  When I think of all the $ for daycare diapers etc., lack of sleep and change of lifestyle this is when I get depressed. My DH will be working nights and sleeping days when the babies are due so  I wonder how we will manage everything.  I didn't feel this way when I thought it was just 1 baby.  I never anticipated twins and still have a hard time wraping my mind around it. 

    I have been put on bedrest until I deliver (hopefully end of Feb) and this definitely makes me depressed. I  think of all the "fun" I'm going to miss. Sounds selfish but I was really looking forward to shopping and decorating the nursery.  I am having fun researching baby gear on line but it's not the same.  I just hope bed rest gets me to the point of having 2 healthy babies. 

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  • You are not alone. If there is anyone you can reach out to, please do. Depression is a difficult thing to manage on your own. Know that there are ladies here that will listen if you ever need to talk, myself included. PM me anytime.

    Take care of yourself and your precious LO :)

  • image akaMrsL:

    I think my feelings about this pregnancy have more to do w/feeling overwhelmed with the idea of twins.  When I think of all the $ for daycare diapers etc., lack of sleep and change of lifestyle this is when I get depressed. My DH will be working nights and sleeping days when the babies are due so  I wonder how we will manage everything.  I didn't feel this way when I thought it was just 1 baby.  I never anticipated twins and still have a hard time wraping my mind around it. 

    I have been put on bedrest until I deliver (hopefully end of Feb) and this definitely makes me depressed. I  think of all the "fun" I'm going to miss. Sounds selfish but I was really looking forward to shopping and decorating the nursery.  I am having fun researching baby gear on line but it's not the same.  I just hope bed rest gets me to the point of having 2 healthy babies. 

    You just described so much of how I feel. My husband was thrilled to find out we were having twins and I am the one feeling apprehensive about it and he doesn't understand. I felt totally prepared for one baby but two threw me for a loop and I am having trouble getting on board. I had so many things that I wanted to do - EBF, cloth diaper, go back to work part time...things that just seem infinitely harder with two babies. I was looking forward to an active, healthy pregnancy and now I'm scared to death of preterm labor. I looked forward to shopping for my baby and now everything is about cost, cost, cost. I obviously feel love for both of my babies but sometimes I feel like I resent the situation. It really gets me down :( These feelings, combined with hormones and the fear that I just won't be able to give my all as a mother to two babies at the same time have me crying all the time.

    It's nice to see that there are others feeling similarly. I wanted this pregnancy so badly and sometimes I feel almost ungrateful. 

  • I have the same feelings as you (OP). I hate having to lie and tell people that I am excited. We planned this pregnancy so I was very surprised to end up feeling this way. I still haven't told some good friends that we're pregnant. I also worry about post pardum. I am coping by trying to not put too much pressure on myself. DH says he has enough excitement for 5 people so he'll give me some when I'm ready. I may be getting through it because I bought a baby item for the first time today...big step for me.
  • I've been on antidepressants for 10 years. Have been tapering off of them since the BFP. Generally things have been pretty good for me, but this week I cut my dose of Celexa in half again and DH is out of town for the week. Found myself crying for no reason last night.

    It's the hormones, and the changes. Keep a journal if you can--just write down how you're feeling each day, that way you can track your mood over time and decide if you want to see a psychiatrist or other therapist. I see my psychiatrist about once a month, but I know that if things get bad, I can start seeing her more frequently, which is comforting.

    Good luck! You're not alone.

  • I have been so up and down. Some days I'm great and other days I am not so much. Early in my pregnancy I really hadn't accepted the whole idea and I didn't want to tell anyone about it and my mom always wanted to talk and I didn't want to at all. Now I'm better but there are still sometimes I don't want to talk about it and I don't always feel excited.
  • Yep I feel the same. I've been having a really low week, hopefully next week will be better. I saw pictures of my friends out and having fun and I just started balling. I probably wouldn't even have gone out even if I wasn't pregnant but still, I don't have an option now. I feel like my life is over and it is, my old life at least...
  • Definitely not alone. I get that way too. I hope it goes away as I get bigger. I think of how we used to go out and have fun and how I wanted to be married for a few years for the "us" time before we made family. Of course, God and nature had different plans. I will be 5 months pg at the wedding and we won't get too much "us" time before our LO arrives. But we have been together 3 years already, so it's not so bad. I know I am not, but at 25 I still feel young to be having a baby. My mom had my older bro when she was 23. I guess this isn't what I had written in my life plan. LOL.

    Then when I feel movement, all the upset leaves. I remember I have created another human and it is growing inside. And that makes me happy.

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