Trying to Get Pregnant

Will your kids have godparents?

DH and I were discussing this the other day and he doesn't see the purpose of godparents. I'm Hispanic, so in the Hispanic culture is very common to have godparents, whether you're catholic or not. I love my godmother and godfather, they are VERY important in my life and I can't imagine not having them. I decided I want my cousin who I grew up with and is like a sister to me, to be the godmother of our first child and then I told DH that he could choose the godfather. His answer was "our kids are not having godparents, we're not catholic and that's stupid, I don't see the point". I got kind of hurt and upset at his attitude. I have adopted American traditions that I never celebrated because I know they are important to him, so you'd think he would be a little more sensitive about it. Anyways, our kids are having godparents regardless of what he thinks, and I'll just have to choose them myself. So I was wondering, what is your take in having/being a godparent?
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Re: Will your kids have godparents?

  • Yes

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  • DH and I are both Catholic, so yes our kids will have godparents.  I guess since I grew up with it I didn't realize it was such a "catholic" tradition.  I knew non-catholics who did.  Maybe you could explain to YH you want to do it because of your heritage not because of religion.
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  • We're atheists, so having godparents doesn't make a whole lot of sense for us.  We have written in our wills who we would like to have custody of our children should something happen to both of us.

    Even if your husband doesn't see the purpose, I see no harm in having them if it's important to you.  You should definitely choose them yourself since you're the one it's important to. 

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  • Ours wont, but it's because we are not religious.
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  • DH and I aren't religious, so our kids won't have godparents. I never had them and DH's are his aunt and uncle that doesn't even really see all that much.
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  • My son has God-parents.  However, with some recent family changes, the person has changed.  We take God Parents to mean, "You are who we are entrusting him to if we should die..."  It was my cousin, but he recently adopted a daughter and now has his hands full.  It is now my cousin who was my matron of honor, like a sister to me and her husband.  They have two young boys (5 and 2).  They all understand and appreciated the change.
  • We are Catholic. Yes, our children will have godparents. We are the godparents of our youngest niece. Plus, I am the godmother for another niece.
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  • Yes, our kids will have godparents.  We are Catholic and we think it's a great tradition.  I know plenty of people who aren't Catholic who choose godparents as well.
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  • yes, we are practicing Catholics, so our children will be baptized and have godparents... not sure who yet, guess we'll figure that out when its time.

    The godparents will likely be different than the guardians of our children as written in our will.

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  • We're not religious at all.  I was growing up but have recently strayed from all the nonsense (sorry if i offend anyone).  Anyway, we do plan on writing wills to include who will have custody of our children.  But we won't baptize them or anything like that.

  • We are debating on Godparents or not. M says he doesn't care and I only want one. I think I am going to hurt some feelings with whoever I chose.
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  • image emsrdh03:
     Maybe you could explain to YH you want to do it because of your heritage not because of religion.

    Ours will not.  I grew up without a religious background and DH grew up catholic, but has grown to be more agnostic.

    Traditionally Godparents are basically responsible for ensuring the child's religious education is carried out, and for caring for the child if something happened to the parents. But anymore, Godparents are more of an extra special "aunt" or "uncle"

     

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  • I never took Godparents as the guardians of your child(ren) in the event of your passing. And we had them growing up.

    No, we won't be having Godparents b/c we aren't very religious. We will name guardians in a will when the time comes.

  • I already explained to him that we're not doing it for religious reasons since neither of us is Catholic. We're doing it because is my tradition and he can't take that away from me. He just shrug his shoulders, my little supportive husband Smile
  • God parents are not something I grew up with.  My family is very religious, but not Catholic.  There is no tradition of god parents in my family.  However, I am not sure what DH thinks.  It is something we will have to talk about.  I will have to get his opinion on this issue. 

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  • Our DD doesn't have godparents.  We do have outlined in our will who would take of DD if something ever happened to both of us but that is about it.

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  • It is interesting that you bring this up.  I was going to ask a similar question.  Something like, Will the God parents of your kids be someone who takes their faith seriously and can be a role model to your child religiously, or just some person that is close to you. 

    I want my childrent o have God parents, but I think it would cause I problem b/w my and DH's family.  He has two brothers and I know he would want them to be the god parents, but neither of them go to church at all.  I do not want that. So this is a dilemma to us as well.  

    I would say you need to explain to DH how much this means to you.

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  • Yes.

    BTW- Its not only the Catholic religion that has godparents.  I'm am Lutheran and we have godparents.  I was recently at a friend's child's baptism at a Presbyterian (sp?) church and they had godparents also.  

  • Ours will. Because we are baptizing/christening.

    Our problem comes with the fact that I'm Catholic and hes Lutheran. If we baptize in the Catholic faith the Godparents if married (as all possibilities are) the marriage has to have been witnessed by a Catholic priest (which non have been). We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.

    If anyone knows I would love to know!

    Funny you ask this today because last night my SIL forgave me for not including them in whether or not we are TTC and just asked if she and her hubs could be Godparents when the blessed event happen. I explained this to her and she is not talking to me again Crying

     

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  • Bug has a godmother - my best friend. However, we have been at odd's over a god father and apparently everything that DH has read on the subject is that a child only has a god mom or god dad.

    He wants his brother, who doesn't even believe in a higher power, and I would like his bff who very much believes in God and comes from a very spiritual family.

    It's important to me that our kids have one or the other, so right now they have a God Mom

  • Yes, and DD does.  It was a given that we were going to Baptise our children and so we had to choose Godparents.  We aren't religious either, but it was still important to us.  Also, the Godparents are not who will take care of DD if something should happen to us.  That is someone else designated in our will.
  • Since we plan to have the godparents be people who can guide/inspire in a religious sense, we plan to pick people who are also practicing Catholics. I also think we will pick friends b/c our sisters already have a special bond. In fact, we haven't talked about it recently, but I think I know who we will pick for our first child.
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  • image rrcraz7:


    Our problem comes with the fact that I'm Catholic and hes Lutheran. If we baptize in the Catholic faith the Godparents if married (as all possibilities are) the marriage has to have been witnessed by a Catholic priest (which non have been). We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.

    If anyone knows I would love to know!

     

    I don't understand this... you can pick godparents that aren't married... i think as long as one of the godparents is 'in good standing' with the Church (meaning they belong to a parish, attend regularly, etc) it doesn't matter.  

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  • I'm not sure.  DH is Catholic and has godparents, but I'm not and never had any.  I suppose we might have them.  It's something we'll have to discuss.
  • My (atheist) vote is no, and H's (agnostic) vote is leaning no, too. But H was raised first as a Catholic and later as an Episcopalian, and his parents are elders in the church, so I have a feeling that they're going to try to push us into godparents. 

    We've already had...discussions...with them about baptism....

  • image rrcraz7:

    We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.

    If anyone knows I would love to know!

    Your parish priest should know the requirements. (I guess I never knew you needed an exception in this case.)

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  • image ladipale:
    image rrcraz7:


    Our problem comes with the fact that I'm Catholic and hes Lutheran. If we baptize in the Catholic faith the Godparents if married (as all possibilities are) the marriage has to have been witnessed by a Catholic priest (which non have been). We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.

    If anyone knows I would love to know!

     

    I don't understand this... you can pick godparents that aren't married... i think as long as one of the godparents is 'in good standing' with the Church (meaning they belong to a parish, attend regularly, etc) it doesn't matter.  

    Yes we can pick Godparents that are not married, which would eliminate the church's issue but create war in the family. All of our siblings, save for 2, are married. I could not choose friends over our sisters and brothers.

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  • image rrcraz7:

    Ours will. Because we are baptizing/christening.

    Our problem comes with the fact that I'm Catholic and hes Lutheran. If we baptize in the Catholic faith the Godparents if married (as all possibilities are) the marriage has to have been witnessed by a Catholic priest (which non have been). We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.

    If anyone knows I would love to know!

    Funny you ask this today because last night my SIL forgave me for not including them in whether or not we are TTC and just asked if she and her hubs could be Godparents when the blessed event happen. I explained this to her and she is not talking to me again Crying

     

     

    I have a similar dilemma. I have another cousin who is also close to me but now as close as the one I choose for Godmother. This other cousin, our mothers are sisters and her mom is my godmother, my mom is her godmother, so she always assumed that I would be the godmother of her first child and she'd be the godmoother of mine. Well the problem I have with this is that I barely see her because she lives in Switzerland.

    I want my kid to be able to interact with his/her godparents, you know? So I know that when it comes time to announce the godparents, she'll be extremely offended and hurt. :(

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