Babies: 0 - 3 Months

My baby is never happy - please help!

I feel like this can't be normal... DD fusses almost constantly. During feedings she is calm for a couple minutes, but then pulls on and off the breast, moaning and fussing, shaking her head back and forth and in and out (like she's hungry but doesn't like my milk). After feedings she cries, fusses, spits up several times, sometimes projectile vomits, and after wearing herself out drifts into a very light, restless sleep. If I try to put her down she wakes up and cries, and it takes so long to settle her. After half an hour or so of sleep, she wakes up showing hunger signals, and I feed her and the cycle begins again.

The evenings are even worse, because her fussing turns into inconsolably screaming and crying. She gets all tense and arches her back and turns bright red, like she's so angry that she hurting so much. Nothing seems to soothe her.

The pedi said she has reflux, but we tried her on meds and it seemed to make things worse. She's gaining weight despite the daily projectile vomiting, but my gut just tells me something is wrong. It's like my milk hurts her....

I feel so helpless and frustrated because there doesn't seem to be anything I can do to make my baby happy. I'm scared to leave the house with her because I know she'll start crying and I won't be able to calm her. Last night during one of her crying fits I just sat there and cried right along with her. I just don't know what to do.

Has anyone else gone through this, or have any idea what it might be? Please help!

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Re: My baby is never happy - please help!

  • DD did the same thing at the same age for about a week. We chalked it up to gas/bowel pressure that she didn't understand and didn't know how to release.

    Good luck! I hope it doesn't last long for you!

  • It could maby be a milk allergy? Or something else in your diet that she does not like and her body is regecting? I have heard of women actually stripping down their diet...like just chicken, rice and very bland foods. After a couple of days, gradually start adding things back in and see if it happens again.
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  • Which reflux med is she on? She probably needs to go on a different one if it's not being effective. 

     

    Are you eating dairy? Maybe you oculd cut it and see if that helps.

    Colic Calm gripe water helped my DS a LOT when he would get gassy or colicky in the evenings.

     

    I would def call your pedi and see about different meds if they're not working. In the meantime, if she'll only sleep being held, then hold her. DS only slept like that for three months. Being upright on my chest was his favorite way to sleep and helped with the reflux.

  • Maybe colic?  Have you tried eliminating dairy/other gas sensitive foods from your diet?  Totally guessing here..
  • I'd cut out dairy and then soy.

    What are her poops like?

  • Mine seems a lot like this during the day. Thankfully, she sleeps okay at night.

    She coughs and chokes while eating, and I think it's overactive letdown. I've been reading about what to do about that, but so far nothing has worked. I might try an LC next week. Have you talked to an LC or La Leche League?

    During the day, she won't sleep unless she's being held. Last week my mom was here, and she basically held her most of the day so I could get a little break. I don't know what I'll do if she keeps doing it next week when I'm alone. She was doing it at night as well, so I would just hold her, put her down, pick her up, etc. until she eventually stayed down.

    Have you tried the 5 S's? Swaddling is great for me at night.



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  • I would go back to your pedi and ask for a stronger reflux med.  Mine told us for insurance reasons they have to start with Zantac and work their way up to the stronger stuff.

    Your baby might also have colic, which is usually chalked up to gas/immature digestive systems, which peaks around 6 weeks and tends to taper off until about 12 weeks.  Try Gripewater or Colic Calm for this, it works great for us as well as Mylicon.

    Other than that, try bobbing and/or dancing with your LO to music during those fussy times.  It's worked great for my son, he usually ends up falling asleep. :) 

    Hang in there!

  • image **Gretchen**:

    I'd cut out dairy and then soy.

    What are her poops like?

    I've cut out dairy, but not soy yet... So far no difference.

    Her poops are frequent (every 2-3 hrs), green, and watery. But I have no basis for comparison so I don't know if that's normal or not...

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  • My DD was exactly the same way. She has reflux, and I still don't know if the meds really helped her, or if it just got better as she got older. I cut out dairy, soy, and eggs. I don't really know if that helped either, but I haven't put anything back in my diet because I'm so scared of what will happen if I do. I was an emotional wreck in the beginning and I felt just like you do- that my milk was hurting her. But honestly, just know that it *will* get better. DD still spits up A TON, but she's not as uncomfortable as she was when she was a newborn. The dirty laundry I can deal with :) Hang in there, mama! It'll get better. Also, I do recommend stripping down your diet to see if that helps.
  • Well, my baby did this too, and much like yourself I pulled my hair out trying to figure it out. ?It was a hard couple of weeks and my husband and I lost much sleep dealing with our daughter during this time, but it does pass and just know that your baby is only 3 weeks old and is still getting used to the world. ?I don't know why but 6 weeks is truly a magical transition (growth spurts aside.) ?If it is gas, try what others have suggested, like changing your diet, no spicy or gassy foods, very simple and bland food. ?My daughter liked to sleep on my husband's arm, belly side down...you can rub her tummy with some oil, or see if she might take a pacifier, the sucking soothes them.
  • image acia:
    image **Gretchen**:

    I'd cut out dairy and then soy.

    What are her poops like?

    I've cut out dairy, but not soy yet... So far no difference.

    Her poops are frequent (every 2-3 hrs), green, and watery. But I have no basis for comparison so I don't know if that's normal or not...

    Have you cut out hidden dairy as well? I think I'd try to get the soy out as well, see if that helps.

    I've heard green poops can at times be normal, but for my DD it's when she's getting a foremilk/hindmilk imbalance. Hers are a dark forest green and watery when that is going on. The only thing I've found to fix this is pumping off an ounce or so before I feed her. It's annoying as hell (especially those middle of the night feedings), but it's working.

    If you need any help with hidden dairy stuff, let me know, I'm actually allergic to dairy, so I've lived my whole like dairy free.

  • have you been on Prevacid for the reflux? DS acted exactly like that towards bottles and still did on Zantac and 1/2 Prevacid a day - now we are on 1/2 Prevacid morning and night and it's great!
  • My daughter has colic and acid reflux and acted similarly, no naps either during the day. It was hellish. I also had an overactive milk supply which was causing her to choke, aggravating her reflux, etc. Here's what I am doing:

    Went to an LC and found out some new positions other than the traditional football and cradle that let her control the milkflow rather than drown in it. My favorite is the side by side (lying down), DD is so relaxed during feedings now.

    My pedi had me eliminate dairy first for two weeks and had an upper GI track test done on DD to make sure there were no anatomical issues. I also have DD sleeping in her carseat to keep her upright and she is as cozy as can be and pedi said that was just fine to do.

    It seemed to get worse after a few weeks, so my pedi had me also eliminate wheat and eggs from my diet. I noticed a huge change after that. We still have some bad days and occassional nights, but compared to what it was, this is bearable.

    Oh, I also have been doing a lot of infant massage and give her mylicon at every feeding to eliminate gas, which helps. And, finally, because she only likes to be held up and down, I bought a moby wrap so that I wasn't having to carry her all day long, and that has been a lifesaver.

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