Hi, I only told a few people we were pregnant. Fortunately the few we shared with are extremely supportive. Despite this, my attitude and general energy is down and people I haven't told are noticing. I know I don't have to share anything with them, but other than hiding in my office (which is impossible to do since I'm a supervisor) I don't know what to do. How do these feeling last? Is this a problem for anyone else?
Thanks
Re: For those who did tell anyone they were pregnant....
Hi there-- so sorry for your loss. I'm in a similar situation-- although I'm not a supervisor, so I am lucky enough to close the door and ignore people most of the time. We never told anyone that we were pregnant, and I was very early when I m/c (8.5 wks). Still, I have a strong feeling the admins that sit outside my office, as well as some of my neighboring colleagues, have a strong inkling as to something being up. They've been really respectful, only asking how I'm feeling (I started miscarrying thursday, came into work and left to go home sick after a couple hours). They don't pry, which is good. Still, it's very very lonely at work...
Anyway, just try and keep your interactions to a minimum if you want time to yourself, and maybe come late and leave early, or take a day off here and there. You don't owe anyone any explanations if you don't want to give them, just state simply you're sick, and that's that. Even supervisors get sick. Good luck... I don't know how long these feelings last, as I'm still having them. If it helps, call those friends/family that know of your loss during the day, behind closed doors. Maybe they can pick you up a bit during the day.
I'm very sorry for your loss. We told very few people we were pg so I know what you're going through. Most people kept a respectful distance because they could tell something was wrong. A few good friends asked about what was wrong and we just told them the truth. We were careful to mention that we didn't tell anyone and to please keep the information to themselves. SO far they have.
After about 2 weeks I was able to keep it together at work. Once I got home it was a different story though.
I know it's very difficult right now, but it will get better.
HUGS!!
TTCAL buddy to LMichelleG - Praying for a miracle
PgALbuddy to CanonMom & BriAZ - Congrats on your beautiful little girls Labor Buddy to Luvsbunny
This, exactly. I told my boss right away because when things started going wrong I kept having to leave to go the doctor. I started a new job and didn't want her to think I had a habit of missing work. Then, after it was confirmed I had had a miscarriage I told one person on my team. She offered to tell our other team members so they would be aware, but told them I didn't want to talk about it. After that, I got a very kind email from a co-worker who had been through the same thing. She didn't pressure me to talk about it, but just said she knew how it felt. I was glad people knew so they didn't just wonder what was wrong with me, but they left me alone.