2nd Trimester

I'm scared =(

I'm really scared of giving birth, you guys... It doesn't help that I'm watching Baby Story, Pregnancy for Dummies, and Birth Day on TV.

I thought I wanted an epidural... but that scares me, too.  

I'm scared of episiotomies... of contractions... of pain, and I'm also scared of c-sections, the whole thing just freaks me out.

I get hysterical, and I'm afraid I'll just flip out.  I don't know what to do.  It's probably early to take birthing classes, but I saw a class called Hypnobirth, where they help you overcome the fear.  I think I need to take that.  

:-(  How are you all dealing? 

Re: I'm scared =(

  • I'm terrified, but I know that it's going to bring my baby into this world, so that makes me feel better.
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  • I'm actually fine with the whole delivery process.  My sister invited me to the birth of her daughter last November she made it seem like nothing and made it look so easy.  I hope my delivery is just like hers.

  • Have you watched The Business of Being Born? If not I recommend that you watch it. Hypnobirth sounds great. I think it is worth a try.
  • Did you sister have an epidural or episiotomy... or did she go to breathing classes?
  • I just think of the millions who have done it before me. There's no need to freak out!?
  • Stop watching that stuff!!!  It does not help.  And you'll just build it up for nothing.  Just turn off the TV and close the books.
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  • It is scary to think of the pain of childbirth.  However, everytime I have that thought enter my head I think about all of the ladies who have made it through birth (countless) and have lived to tell about it.  That makes the fear go away.  Maybe you could read a book or two of the success stories (Ina May's Guide to Childbirth is a good one).  Perhaps that would help until you are able to take a birthing class.
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  • hmdhmd
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    I was freaked out too.  And I was induced, which I think is worse for the nerves because you have a deadline instead of it just surprising you.  Although you never know how any labor is going to go, I guess.  Once the contractions kicked in, my fear of the epidural was gone.  And lots of people say they don't feel a thing after that.  They had to turn mine off so I could push. 

    This time around, I am just trying not to think about it.  I will deal with it when it happens. 

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  • image emakoo01:
    Did you sister have an epidural or episiotomy... or did she go to breathing classes?

    She didn?t go to any birthing or breathing classes and yes she had both an epidural and episiotomy.

  • I haven't freaked out because I figure I have to do it.  There is no way around it so I had better just deal.
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  • image Tchaikov32:
    Stop watching that stuff!!!? It does not help.? And you'll just build it up for nothing.? Just turn off the TV and close the books.

    I agree with this. ?Your body knows what to do. ?

    I've had an epidural, they aren't bad at all. The only part that hurts is the numbing part and it feels not as bad as a bee sting. ?After they got my epi working, I had ZERO pain. It was fantastic. The only problem was.. it didn't work at first. But thankfully, they fixed it. ?I've heard since then it was probably the anesthesiologist's fault. Whatever, I don't care. It worked. LOL.?

    I had no desire in watching anyone else give birth (and still don't). Theirs is not going to be how yours is. I'm more talking about on tv shows or documentaries. Someone close to me, sure I'll witness, but I don't want an up-close-and-personal view. I didn't even want anyone to have that with me!

    Stop watching. You're only going to freak yourself out. ?Just remember that it is going to happen, but is not going to be as bad as you imagine.

    It's easy to get scared of those things when you see them happening all the time. ?

  • I'm of the belief that the majority of pain in child birth can be avoided by not fearing what you were made to do. Not to say that childbirth isn't painful )it is.) but you can handle it! Your body was specifically designed to handle pregnancy and birth. It works as it should. Read up on what will happen, how you will feel etc. take as many classes as you would like. Knowledge is power. Power over fear of childbirth.  Women have been delivering babies for thousands of years.  And you can do it too. No matter how you deliver (c-section, natural, epidural, water birth) it will happen and it will be worth it, and You can handle it. I went into the birth of my son armed with knowledge of what was going to happen and what could go wrong. I delivered him with only minimal drug intervention (I was put on pitocin, b/c I wasn't progressing and went from easy contractions to full blown hard labour in like 5 minutes, I then requested some IV pain meds, but they would only administer those until 3 hours before I delivered so I went through the hardest part of labour w/o meds and you know what? it hurt, but it wasn't horrifying.) You can handle this!
  • I'm definately scared by the idea of giving birth, and I hate the idea of needles, especially epidurals.  One thing that has helped me is to look into some natural methods of relaxation and pain relief and be able to think about things I can do that will help me.  I strongly recomend a book called "The Birth that is right for you"  I don't know who the author is, but it helped to figure out what sort of things would help with my personality.  It was very comforting to plan out little details and methods I would like to try, such as taking a shower, etc.  Hope that helps.  It is a natural process and you will have plenty of people making sure you get through it and don't suffer too much. 
  • Educate yourself on the process and everything that goes on with your body during labor. It will help you calm down once you understand what you're going through. It's not too early to start classes if you're doing something like Bradley, which is 12 weeks. It just depends on what you're looking for.
  • I agree with not watching televised births.  They are not accurate portrayals of birth - think about it - they are edited down to 30 minute blocks, you know?

    Instead, I would learn the physiology of birth and how it works so that you have a good basis in understanding.  Then explore all your options for pain relief/pain management.

    I am a HUGE fan of Hypnobirthing (the Mongan Method).  I would strongly recommend you take the class to help you alleviate your fears, but maybe just picking up the book would start that process (it's meant to be a companion piece to the class, so not all the techniques are 100% covered).


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  • The way I see it is it is scary and painful but women go through it every single day and then do it again!  It can't be that bad!  Think positive.
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  • image courtney_lynne:
    I'm of the belief that the majority of pain in child birth can be avoided by not fearing what you were made to do. Not to say that childbirth isn't painful )it is.) but you can handle it! Your body was specifically designed to handle pregnancy and birth. It works as it should. Read up on what will happen, how you will feel etc. take as many classes as you would like. Knowledge is power. Power over fear of childbirth.  Women have been delivering babies for thousands of years.  And you can do it too. No matter how you deliver (c-section, natural, epidural, water birth) it will happen and it will be worth it, and You can handle it. I went into the birth of my son armed with knowledge of what was going to happen and what could go wrong. I delivered him with only minimal drug intervention (I was put on pitocin, b/c I wasn't progressing and went from easy contractions to full blown hard labour in like 5 minutes, I then requested some IV pain meds, but they would only administer those until 3 hours before I delivered so I went through the hardest part of labour w/o meds and you know what? it hurt, but it wasn't horrifying.) You can handle this!

     

    THANKS!  Thanks to all of you for the kind words.  

     Courtney - what kind of IV pain meds did they give you?  I have a hunch that that kind of thing would be right for me, because it's like in-between an epidural and natural.   

  • image emakoo01:

    image courtney_lynne:
    I'm of the belief that the majority of pain in child birth can be avoided by not fearing what you were made to do. Not to say that childbirth isn't painful )it is.) but you can handle it! Your body was specifically designed to handle pregnancy and birth. It works as it should. Read up on what will happen, how you will feel etc. take as many classes as you would like. Knowledge is power. Power over fear of childbirth.? Women have been delivering babies for thousands of years.? And you can do it too. No matter how you deliver (c-section, natural, epidural, water birth) it will happen and it will be worth it, and You can handle it. I went into the birth of my son armed with knowledge of what was going to happen and what could go wrong. I delivered him with only minimal drug intervention (I was put on pitocin, b/c I wasn't progressing and went from easy contractions to full blown hard labour in like 5 minutes, I then requested some IV pain meds, but they would only administer those until 3 hours before I delivered so I went through the hardest part of labour w/o meds and you know what? it hurt, but it wasn't horrifying.) You can handle this!

    ?

    THANKS! ?Thanks to all of you for the kind words. ?

    ?Courtney - what kind of IV pain meds did they give you? ?I have a hunch that that kind of thing would be right for me, because it's like in-between an epidural and natural. ??

    ?

    I don't know if Courtney had any side effects to the IV pain meds, but I will never have those again. ?I had them with Layla and they didn't touch the pain, they only made me loopy and sleepy.

    I'm talking, seriously loopy. ?My Mom and DH said that I kept saying things like "They want me to read backwards and I can't read backwards. How can I have a baby if I can't read backwards?" WTF?!?

    That was horrible. ?I don't know if it was just a side effect for me, but I won't do that again. ?I just kept coming in and out, talking crazy, and they made me SO tired. ?

  • Im actually having a all natural birth and we are registered for Hypno- birthing classes its a 5 wk course. its a technic that teaches you how to breath and relax it puts you in a state of mind to be able to handle the contractions. Here is the website you might want to read more about it.?

    ?

    http://www.hypnobirthing.com/

  • I was a little anxious with my first, but once things got rolling, I had so much adrenaline, and it was so exciting--I just couldn't believe we were going to get to hold our baby!  Don't be afraid of contractions--they feel like period cramps, but do get much stronger.  But it's a familiar pain.  I can't speak for a drug-free birth, but if you do end up getting an epidural (which, btw, I felt only a "bee sting" from the first numbing shot, and then just pressure--it was such a relief to know the pain from the contractions was going to go away, I didn't care a bit about the epi)--but if you do get the epidural, you will likely never be aware of an episiotomy or any tearing.  They'll just tell you about it later.

    Just remember the pain is something you can bear, and if you have trouble along the way, you can choose pain relief.  It doesn't have to be an epidural to start, if you want to try something milder.  I think a childbirth class will help.

    I am scared of a c-section, but--if that's what I need, I'll deal with it in the moment.  Hang in there!  Just remember the amazing outcome of all your hard work!

  • Courtney - what kind of IV pain meds did they give you?  I have a hunch that that kind of thing would be right for me, because it's like in-between an epidural and natural.  

     

    Hey. I had stadol, they do have side effects (which I was very lucky not to expierience) But like I said knowledge is power. Know your body, most people who have IV med side effects also have the same type of side effects to oral script pain meds. I would not say everyone has a good ex. with stadol I have heard many bad things, but ultimatly it will be YOUR desicion! just remember you can do it!

     

    (pardon my spelling-I am so tired right now!)

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