Babies: 0 - 3 Months

F/U to my super stupid husband

So after I posted that huge tirade earlier, I called him at work but he didn't answer. ?So I sent him an email saying we need to both make a list of what chores need to be done on a daily and a weekly basis, combine our lists and then decide how to divide everything up, and when we should do what. ?He called me back and said that was a "stupid idea" and said "well all we have to do is eat dinner, feed & walk the dog, feed & bathe the kid, done." ?Um, NOT done. ?What about dishes and bottle prep? ?What about cleaning up the new hairball the cat coughed up while we were at work? ?What about all the other things he comes up with that actually aren't important thathe ?thinks have to be done instead of bonding w/ our child, like rearranging the beers in the fridge in the garage, or BSing with your friends instead of whipping out that workout and getting home, or giving your wife a rundown of things she needs to do after she brushes her teeth while you watch The First 48 on DVR?

F him. ?He thinks I am an employee rather than his wife. ?Well I quit. ?I'm going to eat cereal for dinner and not cook. ?If he leaves laundry in the washer/dryer when I need to use it, I'm going to throw it on his side of the bed and let him deal with it. ?I hope the cat wallows all in it and covers it in hair too. ?And the next time he asks me what I'm going to do with the shoes under the coffee table that I JUST took off, I'm going to tell him BEND OVER AND I'LL SHOW YOU.

Why did I get married again??

"If I'm goin' down, I'm goin' down loud." -John Evans Tweet me

Re: F/U to my super stupid husband

  • Whoa. Sorry you are going through that. He needs a firm kick in the rear.
  • Again may I come over and kick your husbands A$$?
    image image

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I went on a cooking strike one night because DH complained about dishes in the sink and then plopped down in front of the TV. We had a talk about responsibilities and I told him that even though I am home all day with DD, I don't always have time to complete everything. I also told him that when he complains about nothing being done he makes me feel worthless, like I can't do anything.

    After that he started helping out more and we are doing things as a team, rather than telling one person to do the dishes.

  • image TakYelgif:
    Again may I come over and kick your husbands A$$?

    Sure! ?Thank you for the offer. Big Smile

    "If I'm goin' down, I'm goin' down loud." -John Evans Tweet me
  • I was hoping your update would be better news! I would write his "all we have to do list" down and then make a separate list to show him all the other things that you do during the day to keep things running. He needs the husband version of Nanny 911. Hope it gets better!
  • Ugh! I would kill him!! I think your plan is a good idea. You tried talking to him about it and he didn't get it so you need do what you said. He wants dinner, he can freaking make it himself!
  • Sounds like he needs a swift kick in the balls.  Really give him something to gripe about!
  • Sorry to hear about all your stress. I once got frustrated with my husband and started to pick up his dirty socks that he seemed to forget to pick up everyday, and put them back in his sock drawer. He picks up his own socks now...:)
  • I missed your earlier tirade, but can I just say, thank god I'm not the only who deals with this crap.

     

  • DH pulled this crap once and I cleaned up all my stuff and left his all over, so when our friends came over only his mess was out.  After that he started helping me around the house. 

    I say give him a swift Kick as well.

    William James III born September 18,2008

    Heading back to the RE to try for #2 Appt Sept. 6th.
    BFP 9/20/11, Beta#1 130 14DPO 9/21/11, Beta #2 369 16DPO 9/23/11, Beta #3 19DPO 1501 9/26/11,first ultra sound 9/28/11 (5W0D) one little sac right where it is suppose to be. 2nd ultra sound 10/5/11(6W0D) saw the HB 112BPM. 3rd ultra sound 10/11/11(6W6D) - baby measuring 7W3D HB 147BPM. First OB Appt 10/20/11.

    image
    image


    image

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • I would get up really early on Saturday and leave DC with him for the ENTIRE day. Let him see how much work it is to take care of a baby and try to get housework done.

    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickersLilypie Third Birthday tickersLilypie First Birthday tickersLilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • He needs to spend a whole day alone with DD and be responsible for all her needs as well as the whole house.

    You should get him on the show Crash Test Mommy

  • I think a strike might be just what your H needs to realize how much you actually do around the house.  Honestly, stick to it and let the house get messy and don't fix him dinner.  If he still doesn't get the picture after that, then you two need to talk to a 3rd party to see if you can work through these issues.

    I'm so sorry this is causing you stress.  I went through something similar early on and had a few HUGE fights with DH.  Thankfully, he's improved a lot.  Still, I've had to lower my expectations.  I was expecting too much from him and all it did was make me more upset.  Once I made peace with the fact that I'm the primary caretaker of DD, it made everything easier.  It also helps that DD makes it known that I'm her favorite person on the planet.  :)

  • Ugh, I'm sorry you have to put up with this crap! Definitely go with your plan... maybe it'll make him realize just how much you do around the house once he has to do it himself.  Hopefully!  Otherwise, I go with PPs plan about kicking his asss. :)
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I feel for ya. My H did this to me while I was on maternity leave. Needless to say when he asked "what's for dinner" I would respond "whatever you are cooking". He wore disgustingly dirty clothes to work b/c I refused to wash them. And when his crap piled up around the house, I threw it on the back porch.
  • Whoa. I would go on strike, too. What a jerk.?
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • image Lachins26:
    Sorry to hear about all your stress. I once got frustrated with my husband and started to pick up his dirty socks that he seemed to forget to pick up everyday, and put them back in his sock drawer. He picks up his own socks now...:)

    Sadly, my H will just continue to wear dirty socks.  :(  He does do most of the cooking and remodeling projects around the house, so I can't complain too much.

  • You go girl!   Let him have it!!! Angry

  • Sounds like dh needs to grow the heck up.  Sorry about that. 
  • I'm sorry you're going through this.  My husband tried to act up from time to time and I put a stop to it very quickly.  He's home with LO Wed-Fri, so he knows how hard it is now to take care of a baby and try to get things done around the house.  When I get home sometimes he complains about how hard it is, and I just laugh and say "good, I'm glad you realize it".  He never once tells me that things need to get done, he just does them, because he understands that one person should not do it alone.  You're husband needs a serious reality check, and needs to stop treating you like hired help.
  • image Lachins26:
    Sorry to hear about all your stress. I once got frustrated with my husband and started to pick up his dirty socks that he seemed to forget to pick up everyday, and put them back in his sock drawer. He picks up his own socks now...:)

    This is awesome!  I'm totally doing that to hubby....starting today!

    And Amy....I actually live close enough to come over and kick his a$$.  You've got my number girl!

    ~Sweet Girl *8/18/08* c-section ~ Sweet Boy *12/2/10* VBAC ~ Sweet Boy *8/14/12* VBAC~ 

    image

    VBAC Birth Story    2VBAC Birth Story  


  • why don't you try killing him with kindness?? make something nice for dinner and tell  him you love him.  i always have food available for my husband and he is always extremely sweet to me.  i mean don't stress out if its too much but just ask him to old the baby while you make his favorite meal.  if he doesn't appreciate it, just try it again.  i'm sure he'll come around.  i'm sure regretting your decision about marriage and getting angry isn't going to help anything, even if he is being unreasonable.
  • image ruthiebell:
    why don't you try killing him with kindness?? make something nice for dinner and tell  him you love him.  i always have food available for my husband and he is always extremely sweet to me.  i mean don't stress out if its too much but just ask him to old the baby while you make his favorite meal.  if he doesn't appreciate it, just try it again.  i'm sure he'll come around.  i'm sure regretting your decision about marriage and getting angry isn't going to help anything, even if he is being unreasonable.

    Yeah, I'm sure that's going to make him change his ways...lol.

  • OMG, kill him wiith kindness?  What kind of crap is that?  This husband is being a jerk to the nth degree and really doesn't deserve kindness.  He needs to be told flat out, that his actions are unacceptable, and he better shape up.
  • image ruthiebell:
    why don't you try killing him with kindness?? make something nice for dinner and tell  him you love him.  i always have food available for my husband and he is always extremely sweet to me.  i mean don't stress out if its too much but just ask him to old the baby while you make his favorite meal.  if he doesn't appreciate it, just try it again.  i'm sure he'll come around.  i'm sure regretting your decision about marriage and getting angry isn't going to help anything, even if he is being unreasonable.

    Get that Martha Stewart *** outta here!

  • image ruthiebell:
    why don't you try killing him with kindness?? make something nice for dinner and tell  him you love him.  i always have food available for my husband and he is always extremely sweet to me.  i mean don't stress out if its too much but just ask him to old the baby while you make his favorite meal.  if he doesn't appreciate it, just try it again.  i'm sure he'll come around.  i'm sure regretting your decision about marriage and getting angry isn't going to help anything, even if he is being unreasonable.

     Wha?

    Way to let a DH continue to take his wife for granted. "Hmmm, I can do nothing around the house, have dinner each night without lifting a finger ever, and my wife even tells me she loves me after bowing down to my every whim. What reason is there to change my ways, this is working just fine for me".

  • Yup, he's being an immature jerk. 

    Let him take care of the baby alone.  Seriously, it works wonders.  DH started taking FMLA to take care of DD when I went back to work a month ago. OMG, it has worked wonders.  He understands what it's like and is wholly invested in her now.  It's great to have an equal partner now.

  • image ruthiebell:
    why don't you try killing him with kindness?? make something nice for dinner and tell  him you love him.  i always have food available for my husband and he is always extremely sweet to me.  i mean don't stress out if its too much but just ask him to old the baby while you make his favorite meal.  if he doesn't appreciate it, just try it again.  i'm sure he'll come around.  i'm sure regretting your decision about marriage and getting angry isn't going to help anything, even if he is being unreasonable.

    Ick!

    And then what?  A big old BJ?  Good God.  You are a mess Ruthiebell. 

    Wheee!
    image

    "When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents enjoyment of their babies, it's rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep." ~ James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame

    image
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards