@BWhitta I'm so sorry to hear about your loss! I know how hard this must be for you. I hope you're able to get back at it ASAP. In the meantime, relax and take care of yourself this weekend. Hugs for you!
Thank you, everyone. It certainly is hard...I've just been lying around all day which I think is both good and bad but it's what I need today. The doctor's office just called to confirm my 6 week ultrasound for Tuesday which was not fun...still waiting to hear back from them about what we should do if/when I ovulate this cycle.
Married for 5 years, TTC for 3 years
PCOS, Low AMH, Endo, Uterine Fibroids, Low Estrogen... and a Partridge in a Pear Tree. 3 Losses, 8/16 11/16 and 6/2017
@hoffmanr7 I'm so sorry about AF! I know exactly how you feel. FX for round 2!
I went in for my beta today and BFN. I wasn't shocked--I've had AF symptoms for the past few days--but I was surprised how sad I was. I cried in my office to my mom and DH for an hour and intermittently throughout the afternoon. I haven't really done that throughout the whole process, so it was unexpected. I felt so good about this cycle. I'm still planning to start round 2 when AF finally shows, and we're going to see the RE again on Wednesday.
On on the plus side, we're camping with friends this weekend and I can drink all the beer.
@hoffmanr7 Sorry about AF. Mine showed up today too. A few days earlier than expected, so I'll be starting my round 2 of Clomid in a few days as well. It's nice to feel like I know someone else going through it too.
@Bababatty So sorry for the BFN. Sending you good thoughts for round 2. Enjoy the beer, though. I haven't had a drink since before we started this process. I do miss the beer.
@Bababatty, I'm sorry to hear about your negative beta. We tested today and it was also negative. Bummer. Mother nature can be pretty cruel. I'm glad to hear you're going to pick back up and go forward again with the next cycle. We're taking two months break to recover physically, emotionally, and financially before going for our first FET in November.
After having our first two IVFs ending in cancelled cycles, we have to keep reminding ourselves that technically this was our first 'full' chance with IVF. And with five frozen embryos left for us in NYC, I'm thanking my lucky stars that I won't have to do the stims again for a while, hopefully ever. That is helping with easing the blow. We also know that for the first time ever, my FSH is in the low and normal range (only 4.1 last month, down from 16.9!) , so we'll chat with the RE today about our chances of a natural bfp if I can keep taking the DHEA for the next couple months. Wouldn't that be something? Not like I think it'll happen!!
Meanwhile, I'm cleaning out our big hall closet today to keep me busy and feeling productive. It's good therapy.
So I'll probably sign off for several weeks and clear my head until we start prepping for the FET.
@BWhitta@hoffmanr7@bridge-and-wall, I'm also sorry to hear about your losses and bfns this month as well. It sounds like we're all on basically the exact same schedule! And we all had so much hope a few weeks ago! I'm glad we can share the hard times together too though- it helps to know that there are others who are going through it and we're all surviving. I told my husband today, we'll ge tthrough this just like we've gotten through all the other negatives. And then we'll do it all again and have hope again.
Thinking about you all as you get into your next cycles. Hope rises again.
@GoldenKeys- I think I was accidentally "cleaned up." But I needed to update my info anyway: Dx: Unexplained Infertility; Rx: Set appointment with RE
So, I've been MIA for the last few check-ins. DH is doing okay with the unemployment. Spirits are high and he's so much more relaxed without his on call all the time, former job.
We decided not to do our final month of Clomid. I was having a very difficult time with it physically and emotionally. I was miserable 3 weeks out of 4, between my period and the drugs. I was also crying everyday, often at work, or generally angry. We decided that it was just not worth it. I ovulate regularly, we were just attempting to produce multiple eggs in a cycle, so I don't know how much it really improved our chances.
I also had a total breakdown, reckoning with God a few weeks ago and it was a game changer. I've somehow let go of the hope/disappointment, anger and frustration and it's a good place to be. If we are not pregnant by the time DH finds work again, we will go see an RE, but in the meantime, we're trying to get used to the idea of life without children
Together 9 Years, Married 3 Years DH (33) Me (29) TTC 1.5 Years
We know that suffering produces endurance; endurance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us. -Romans 5: 3-4
@mrs.redhead I'm sorry things have been so hard recently. I can understand that feeling of trying to let go of the plans I had for my future, and trying to trust God.
Would letrozole be an option for you? I think it is supposed to work similarly to clomid but tends to have much fewer side effects. I didn't have any side effects while I was taking it for the first time this month.
Me 34 DH 36 Married since July 2010 MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
TTC #1 since June 2015 Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved. Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature 5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP! May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019 July 2019 - FET - BFN Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
@iloverocksalot I'm sorry about your BFN, too. I am glad to hear the good news about your FSH--exciting! And it's good to be looking on the bright side with those great embryos. FX that this next FET works for you. I'll miss seeing you around for a little while, though.
@Mrs.Redhead I'm glad the unemployment is going as well as it can; I hope your DH is able to find a new job soon. I sympathize with your breakdown and reckoning with God. Like you and @ReesaAnne16, I've had a hard time trusting God on this one, until my sister finally said--on Friday, in the midst of my own breakdown--that maybe I needed to look at this as God pointing me toward the right path or the right time. It's hard to let go of your plans, your control, etc. I'm glad you find yourself in a better place now.
It is hard to trust God in this, ladies. I imagine we all struggle to understand God's plan in putting us through this. My DH is confident that we are on the right path and it will work. I am not. I keep asking God to show me the right path and I can't find an answer. It is the hardest part of this process. Pushing forward without being clear that it's the right path or that it will ever happen. We try to stay positive, but it's just really hard.
Re: TTTC Checkin 08/29/2016
Past Treatment: Clomid + Metformin x 3 BFN
Letrozole 5 mg + Trigger shot + IUI = BFP!
Beta confirmed 8/22
EDD 5/1/17
@ReesaAnne16 so exciting! Fingers crossed for you!!!
@iloverocksalot it's so great your RE is so supportive. Sending you lots of positive energy!
No Folic acid/pharmaceuticals/supplements (too many to list- private message me if interested), IVIL infusion
TTC #1 Since: April 2015
Unexplained Infertility
Cycle 1&2 : Clomid 50mg- BFN
Cycle 3: Letrozole 2.5mg- BFN
Cycle 4: Letrozole 5mg- BFN
Cycle 5: HSG-normal
Clomid 100mg+ Estrace- BFN
Cycle 6: Letrozole 5mg+Trigger shot+IUI+Progestrone- BFN
Cycle 7: Letrozole 5mg, Cyst found during follicle check
Cycle 8: Birth control to treat left ovary cyst
Cycle 9: Letrozole 7.5mg+Trigger shot+IUI+Progesterone- BFN
Cycle 10: Letrozole 7.5mg, 2 Cysts found during follicle check
Cycle 11: Clomid 100mg+Estradiol+Trigger shot+IUI+Progesterone- BFN
Cycle 12: Clomid 100mg- BFN
Cycle 13-16: Natural attempts while awaiting IVF
Cycle 14: IVF-BFN
and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.
3 Losses, 8/16 11/16 and 6/2017
TTC #1 Since: April 2015
Unexplained Infertility
Cycle 1&2 : Clomid 50mg- BFN
Cycle 3: Letrozole 2.5mg- BFN
Cycle 4: Letrozole 5mg- BFN
Cycle 5: HSG-normal
Clomid 100mg+ Estrace- BFN
Cycle 6: Letrozole 5mg+Trigger shot+IUI+Progestrone- BFN
Cycle 7: Letrozole 5mg, Cyst found during follicle check
Cycle 8: Birth control to treat left ovary cyst
Cycle 9: Letrozole 7.5mg+Trigger shot+IUI+Progesterone- BFN
Cycle 10: Letrozole 7.5mg, 2 Cysts found during follicle check
Cycle 11: Clomid 100mg+Estradiol+Trigger shot+IUI+Progesterone- BFN
Cycle 12: Clomid 100mg- BFN
Cycle 13-16: Natural attempts while awaiting IVF
Cycle 14: IVF-BFN
I went in for my beta today and BFN. I wasn't shocked--I've had AF symptoms for the past few days--but I was surprised how sad I was. I cried in my office to my mom and DH for an hour and intermittently throughout the afternoon. I haven't really done that throughout the whole process, so it was unexpected. I felt so good about this cycle. I'm still planning to start round 2 when AF finally shows, and we're going to see the RE again on Wednesday.
On on the plus side, we're camping with friends this weekend and I can drink all the beer.
@Bababatty So sorry for the BFN. Sending you good thoughts for round 2. Enjoy the beer, though. I haven't had a drink since before we started this process. I do miss the beer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
After having our first two IVFs ending in cancelled cycles, we have to keep reminding ourselves that technically this was our first 'full' chance with IVF. And with five frozen embryos left for us in NYC, I'm thanking my lucky stars that I won't have to do the stims again for a while, hopefully ever. That is helping with easing the blow. We also know that for the first time ever, my FSH is in the low and normal range (only 4.1 last month, down from 16.9!) , so we'll chat with the RE today about our chances of a natural bfp if I can keep taking the DHEA for the next couple months. Wouldn't that be something? Not like I think it'll happen!!
Meanwhile, I'm cleaning out our big hall closet today to keep me busy and feeling productive. It's good therapy.
So I'll probably sign off for several weeks and clear my head until we start prepping for the FET.
Thinking about you all as you get into your next cycles. Hope rises again.
So, I've been MIA for the last few check-ins. DH is doing okay with the unemployment. Spirits are high and he's so much more relaxed without his on call all the time, former job.
We decided not to do our final month of Clomid. I was having a very difficult time with it physically and emotionally. I was miserable 3 weeks out of 4, between my period and the drugs. I was also crying everyday, often at work, or generally angry. We decided that it was just not worth it. I ovulate regularly, we were just attempting to produce multiple eggs in a cycle, so I don't know how much it really improved our chances.
I also had a total breakdown, reckoning with God a few weeks ago and it was a game changer. I've somehow let go of the hope/disappointment, anger and frustration and it's a good place to be. If we are not pregnant by the time DH finds work again, we will go see an RE, but in the meantime, we're trying to get used to the idea of life without children
Together 9 Years, Married 3 Years
DH (33) Me (29)
TTC 1.5 Years
We know that suffering produces endurance; endurance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us.
-Romans 5: 3-4
Would letrozole be an option for you? I think it is supposed to work similarly to clomid but tends to have much fewer side effects. I didn't have any side effects while I was taking it for the first time this month.
MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN
April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo
June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved.
Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature
5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP!
May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019
July 2019 - FET - BFN
Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues
Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy
July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
@Mrs.Redhead I'm glad the unemployment is going as well as it can; I hope your DH is able to find a new job soon. I sympathize with your breakdown and reckoning with God. Like you and @ReesaAnne16, I've had a hard time trusting God on this one, until my sister finally said--on Friday, in the midst of my own breakdown--that maybe I needed to look at this as God pointing me toward the right path or the right time. It's hard to let go of your plans, your control, etc. I'm glad you find yourself in a better place now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20