every time I have a loss I clean my house top to bottom

iceandsnowflakes29

I'm back. For real. Beta was shit. 

June 29th - 11

July 1- 30

July 5th - 54

if you pray, please pray it is just a miscarriage and not in my one and only tube. 

Taggarab

@iceandsnowflakes29 Are they going to do an US to confirm? Or are the levels so low it wouldn't show anything?

ETA: I'm sorry it was confirmed. My inquisitive brain goes straight to the questions and skipped the condolences 

SnobunnieMel

Noooooooooopooo i am so heart broken for you right now. I am so so so so sorry. Getting that third beta and it not being what you want is the most gut wrenching news. So many prayers this ends up ok for you 

beary67

@iceandsnowflakes29 I am so sorry.  I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.  I hope everything ends up ok.  

rainbowturtles

Noooooo!!!  My heart just dropped and I have a lump in my chest. I'm so so sorry and sending love & light your way 

RiverSong15

I'm so so sorry. Hugs.

iceandsnowflakes29

The nurse is going to ask the dr what he wants to do. 

MissPrint1219

I am so sorry @iceandsnowflakes29. Sending prayers up!

mylittleversailles

@iceandsnowflakes29 I'm so sorry, lady. Love and good vibes to you. It's not freaking fair.

SoonToBeMommaHowe

Praying for you @iceandsnowflakes29. I'm so so sorry.

KarenBeth714

so sorry will be thinking of you!

BrightenMySky

I am so sorry @iceandsnowflakes29.  I am rooting for you.  Hugs.

lilylover27

I am so sorry @iceandsnowflakes29 praying that everything else is ok. Very very sorry

silentP

Hate this. I'm so sorry!

Amdogger82

So sorry @iceandsnowflakes29. Sending your positive thoughts and prayers.

brooklyngirl18

@iceandsnowflakes29 I am so very sorry to hear this news, you have all my thoughts and prayers. please take care of yourself.

amberruka

I am so sorry @iceandsnowflakes29. Hope you get some answers soon. 

iceandsnowflakes29

I have to wait until Friday for another beta. if it is still iffy they are giving methotrexate. If it is lowering it is just am early loss. I begged and begged for the methotrexate today (I only have my right tube ) but they are making me wait until Friday's beta to make the call. Does that seem legit? 

I cannot function right from the anxiety. 

BrightenMySky

@iceandsnowflakes29 I do not know if it is medically right or not to wait until Friday for your next beta.  But I think it is not right that your doctor is not being responsive to your needs; getting an earlier or another beta is such a minor thing, it seems cruel for them not to order it given your anxiety, even if they think it is not medically necessary.  Can your DH call and push them on this (I think I remember you mentioning a husband, sorry if I'm assuming) to give you a break from dealing with them?  

iceandsnowflakes29

@BrightenMySky that's a thought. Yes, I'm married and DH is awesome. 

Let me ask this, will progesterone suppositories slow down a miscarriage  (assuming this is a run of the mill impending miscarriage )?

MooFish2364

@iceandsnowflakes29 I am so so sorry. That is just horrible. I agree with @BrightenMySky - maybe have DH call and pressure them to give you more tests. My DH called for me a few times because I knew I couldn't hold it together on the phone. 

SnobunnieMel

@iceandsnowflakes29 my understand is that they will. Normally in a MC situation usually progesterone drops and that's what triggers the bleeding from a MC. With my last CP I had been put on oral progesterone and it took me 4-5 days after stopping it for the bleeding to start despite my hcg dropping to 3 

iceandsnowflakes29

Thanks everyone. This sucks but, so glad to have you ladies.

BrightenMySky

I mean, I want to call your doctor and yell at them, but I'm not sure that would be productive in my current state.  Plus you know, privacy laws & internet strangers.  

brooklyngirl18

@iceandsnowflakes29 ugh my heart is breaking for you. I was given methotrexate to treat my ectopic pregnancy. The dr initially wanted to wait on 2nd betas to give it but decided to go ahead and give it right away since my betas were so high (around 3k). Do you have any reason to think this might be ectopic? I agree with PP about having your husband call if you think it'll help get you the medicine. just a side note and I'm sorry if this is too soon but I think there is a longer waiting time ttc with methotrexate than having a natural miscarriage. just something to consider, i'm really sorry.

iceandsnowflakes29

@BrightenMySky I assure you that after this he won't be my doctor. 

I called in tears and begged for them to expedite the process but, the nurse told me "whatever happens happens" and to "try to calm down". 

Who says that to someone on the brink of their 5th loss? 

If I feel even slightly sketchy between now and Friday I'm just going to go to the ER. 

iceandsnowflakes29

@brooklyngirl18 I lost my left tube due to ectopic. It was caught too late. They had to remove it. My baby even had a heartbeat. Which is why ectopic scares me more than miscarriage. 

Eta I'm roughly 5 weeks. My ectopic was somewhere between 7 and 9. I went a long time not even knowing I was pregnant. 

brooklyngirl18

I'm so sorry @iceandsnowflakes29, i know that fear all too well. I'm praying it's not ectopic i too would be demanding methotrexate or doing an ultrasound to see if anything can be picked up.

allysondunn2

@iceandsnowflakes29 I am so sorry to see you back here. I cannot imagine what you have been through and I'm praying everything turns out ok for you! I wouldn't be going back to this doctor either.

nmd9168

So sorry everything has been awful and stressful. Hopefully,  it all works out for the best. 

roxgibbons

@iceandsnowflakes29 I am so sorry that you are being treated this way and your feelings are being dismissed. It's not whatever happens happens. That is absolutely terrible. I am furious for you. Can you email your dr directly? Your last beta was on the 5th. You'd think at minimum they can do one tomorrow?

Taggarab

@iceandsnowflakes29 I know exactly how you feel. My dr blew me off with my ectopic and didn't want to even see me, but I pressed for a beta and then they closed for snow so I never got my results, but when I started cramping and bleeding I went straight to the ER. It was too late to save my tube, but at least that's better than the alternative. If they still won't see you before Friday I agree that you should go to the ER if anything seems more off than it already does. Lots of prayers that it's not ectopic because I know having another ectopic is one of my biggest fears and probably yours too. Please take care of yourself in the mean time.

shae86

I just want to say I'm so sorry, @iceandsnowflakes29. I sincerely hope it's a quick, run of the mill early MC and not an ectopic. Good, healing thoughts going out to you. 

Also, I do think the continued use of progesterone may prevent your body from passing everything. It took 10 days after stopping it before my body finally let it go. 

dubcompanion

@iceandsnowflakes29 So now that your mom is off my shit list, I'm putting your doctor's nurse on it instead. I'm just so pissed that you have to go through all this yet again, and you're not getting the medical support you need DESERVE.

iceandsnowflakes29

I called on call dr. I'm bleeding now but, not alot. Waiting for a return call. 

rainbowturtles

You're in my thoughts wish there was more we could do but thank you for the updates

beary67

I hope you get a call back soon. I'm thinking of you and sending you lots of virtual hugs. 

Hopefulmommy1980

I hope that u get a call back.  I am sorry your doctor is not being supportive. 

BornReady

I'm so sorry that you're going through this. 

roper2617

@iceandsnowflakes29 I'm so sorry you're going through this

iceandsnowflakes29

I managed to fight my way to another beta that was performed a few minutes ago and the results ordered stat. 

However, my doctor seems to think this could still be viable. After spotting, cramping, and crap betas that have only doubled once. What the hell? Am I just so used to loss I have wrongly assumed the worst?

Then he told me I should have held off on stopping the progesterone. Is he nuts or am I? 

Okay, rant over. Anyway, I should know results in an hour or two.