What really makes a great mom? Getting ready for motherhood here.

sarahppar

Ladies, 
What do you think makes a great mom? 
I keep hearing they are selfless, giving, nurturing. 
But being selfless is impossible to sustain. A lot of our moms are warn out and have lost their identity by the time they get out of the motherhood years. 
Is there a balance? What other words would you use to describe a "good" mom?

How do you know you are being a great mom?

dfulton808

Being a good solid person first and foremost able to make the conscious decision to have a child. 

Loving, fun, admirable, strong, and responsible are attributes that come to mind.

I don't believe in the selfless thing 100%. Sure your children are the priority in your life but you can't pour from an empty cup, you have to take care of yourself in order to take care of them.

I don't know if my parents "lost their identities", but from the kid's perspective we were fully aware that they had lives outside of us, that they had a marriage to maintain with each other, and I think that was important for us kids. We weren't the center of the universe, adults have their own lives. But we always felt safe and secure.

I'd like to mirror that, obviously with some of their minor mistakes corrected, but generally the same style of parenting.

kyrenora

I don't have THAT much experience (not quite a year yet) but I've found it definitely takes patience!