Blended Families
SpiderMa
member
Flabergasted Stepmom
SpiderMa
member
My fiance's son is 2 years old and a very complex little individual. I have a daughter, same age, and they love each other much like siblings would but he is definitely struggling with some jealousy and feelings of inferiority towards her which results in frequent outburstssuch as yelling at her, snatching her toys from her and hiding them and sometimes hitting (which obviously I don't allow!) but it resorts to that more often lately regardless.
I know he is having communication issues because he is back and forth between 2 totally different environments. For the past few months he has been in my care primarily. His father is home with us mornings but works full time all week and isn't home until after our kids are in bed.
My stepson's mother has him 2-3 days a week and from what I have seen and observed is not very attentive to his needs which creates friction between us because she can sense I am bothered by this though I feel it is overstepping my boundaries to confront her. For 4 months he has had what look like bites to me from head to toe. She said they were flea bites from her cat initially, then that she thought they were chicken pox. I had to really lay into my SO to convince her to take him to see a doctor. When she did she said they were "probably just hives" and got anti-itch cream to apply to the bumps. They worked well to reduce his itching and were almost all cleared up until he went back to her house and came back with new ones! And each week it is the same. He comes to me, I bathe him and apply the cream, it clears up, he goes with her and comes back with more! Lather, rinse, repeat..
And this has gone on since November. We have been to her house, it seems clean enough and she has pointed out that no one else has these bumps and insists he is merely allergic to something.. but as a mother I can't fathom why she isnt finding the source and eliminating it. I have had hives and these are certainly not them! They are clearly bites of some sort and I am afraid whatever it is may eventually spread to my daughter and myself. I have already gotten a rash from him falling asleep on me and woke up with similar bumps where he was laying. I saw a doctor but they preacribed me an anti-inflammatory and didnt run any tests claiming they were certainly bug bites that I just had a bad reaction to.
I'm unsure what to do at this point. I have discussed this with my SO countless times and he is alao at a loss. The child usually is very unkempt and unwashed when we pick him up and I feel like this is neglectful behavior!
He is very emotional and impulsive because I believe he is not getting proper care and attention in her home, and now being his primary caretaker, I'm not sure what options I'm left with. He is not my son but I do see him as family and care for his wellbeing. We are pregnant and I feel that this destructive routine really needs to end! I am taking him to aee a doctor tomorrow on my own but I'm not sure what steps to take after that. Any advice?
I know he is having communication issues because he is back and forth between 2 totally different environments. For the past few months he has been in my care primarily. His father is home with us mornings but works full time all week and isn't home until after our kids are in bed.
My stepson's mother has him 2-3 days a week and from what I have seen and observed is not very attentive to his needs which creates friction between us because she can sense I am bothered by this though I feel it is overstepping my boundaries to confront her. For 4 months he has had what look like bites to me from head to toe. She said they were flea bites from her cat initially, then that she thought they were chicken pox. I had to really lay into my SO to convince her to take him to see a doctor. When she did she said they were "probably just hives" and got anti-itch cream to apply to the bumps. They worked well to reduce his itching and were almost all cleared up until he went back to her house and came back with new ones! And each week it is the same. He comes to me, I bathe him and apply the cream, it clears up, he goes with her and comes back with more! Lather, rinse, repeat..
And this has gone on since November. We have been to her house, it seems clean enough and she has pointed out that no one else has these bumps and insists he is merely allergic to something.. but as a mother I can't fathom why she isnt finding the source and eliminating it. I have had hives and these are certainly not them! They are clearly bites of some sort and I am afraid whatever it is may eventually spread to my daughter and myself. I have already gotten a rash from him falling asleep on me and woke up with similar bumps where he was laying. I saw a doctor but they preacribed me an anti-inflammatory and didnt run any tests claiming they were certainly bug bites that I just had a bad reaction to.
I'm unsure what to do at this point. I have discussed this with my SO countless times and he is alao at a loss. The child usually is very unkempt and unwashed when we pick him up and I feel like this is neglectful behavior!
He is very emotional and impulsive because I believe he is not getting proper care and attention in her home, and now being his primary caretaker, I'm not sure what options I'm left with. He is not my son but I do see him as family and care for his wellbeing. We are pregnant and I feel that this destructive routine really needs to end! I am taking him to aee a doctor tomorrow on my own but I'm not sure what steps to take after that. Any advice?
Re: Flabergasted Stepmom