Three Cheers for Kind Medical Professionals

mylittleversailles

Since I was a small child and a doctor at the walk-in clinic put me through an excruciating experience all the way to the darkest time in my life after I'd found my best friend dead in his bed and I was having massive panic attacks daily and the doctor told me to stop living in the past and that I was too fat to get pregnant, I've been terrified of anything having to do with doctors, nurses, clinics and hospitals.

I haven't had a choice recently, of course. I just want to tell everyone and anyone how kind, wonderful and attentive the nurse at the Early Pregnancy Clinic I'm receiving care from is. She made sure that I got narcotic pain relief, rather than being told to take ibuprofen. She was patient with me about my fear of hypodermic needles. On my second visit, she told me she'd checked my file every day since my initial visit to make sure I was all right - and was so relieved when she saw my ER visit showed everything seemed all right. She is now getting me an appointment to see the OBGYN on call at the hospital during my next check-up to make sure I don't have to wait and can get the go-ahead to start TTC as soon as two weeks from now, rather than having to wait possibly a month or more to get an appointment through a referral. I love her and I wish she was my friend. My husband and I will definitely be sending the nicest flowers I can find to her once this is all over.

Anyone else? Good experiences? Strangers you're thankful for? Doctors who reassure you in confusing, dark times? 

chloe97

I love my new OB. She's my age- which is hard to get used to- and so incredibly open and available to answer questions. She left the practice by my house a year ago and I had switch doctors at that practice. I got an OB who has no bedside manner at all. She gave me no prenatal counseling when I mentioned H and I were TTC, she said come back and see me when you're pregnant. All she could say when I miscarried was "it happens." She acted like I was crazy when I asked if they would test the fetal tissue after my D&C.

I found my old doctor at a new practice 20 minutes away and immediately switched.She assuages my fears and answers every email I send her. Even when I probably seem like I'm BSC. I think it helps that she's pregnant herself right now so she understands my craziness. It sucks bc she will probably be on maternity leave when I get knocked up again, but I've seen other members of her practice and love them too!! All I can say is switch if you do not love your doctor, it makes a world of difference!

RiverSong15

I'm so glad you are finding compassionate care after your experiences. Many good wishes sent your way! I think you should also consider emailing the office manager or whoever is her supervisor and tell them how wonderful this practitioner was. 

For me, it was mixed. The midwife I saw immediately afterward was very future focused (I got a lot of "well at least you know you can get pregnant -ugh). My OB was better. She had more empathy, and ordered a couple tests I wanted, even though she said they likely didn't cause my MC. I love love my PCP though - she always listens, never rushes me out, is very thorough, and never makes me feel like I was crazy. When I emailed her about a thorough thyroid panel after my MC, she explained her reasons for waiting a few weeks and then signed off her email telling me to keep heart. She's awesome.

mylittleversailles

@chloe97 It means nearly everything to feel comfortable with the person you're entrusting so much with.

I liked my midwife a lot, though we only had the chance to meet once. I just felt really abandoned by her when we heard the awful news and would have loved to have felt comfortable enough to page her when I was scared during. I will request her again, I think.

zrain

I love my midwife. I knew she was amazing as soon as I met her and didn't do any other interviews. My ultrasound showed a low heart rate at my very first appointment so it was never a very happy experience, but she fully supported me through the whole process. She gave me her cell number and was ok with me calling with questions a few times a week while we waited for test results and then while I waited to miscarry. I finally had my miscarriage last night and called to update her today. She told me that she takes extra special care of her mamas that have miscarried, and when I get pregnant she said to call her the same day I see my first BFP so I can get in to see her and she can support me through from the beginning and give me whatever reassurance I need, whether that's monitoring hCG, early ultrasounds, herbs, or anything else. I felt so supported through the whole awful thing and I can't wait for her to help me with my future take home babies.

catiecatp

I love my GP - in fact, I drive nearly an hour each way from a major city centre out to a rural office to see her. I do get special treatment because her sister is my BFF but I think she's a smart cookie and that is why I started going to see her. My GP that I had before her was quite dismissive and I had issues with her process - but I think that was in part because of her location - she was the head doctor on my university campus and I'm sure she's used to dealing with a lot of little stupid things. While I was starting to have my MC my regular GP was on medical leave for a few weeks and I had to go see another doctor that was covering for her. Well - I wasn't as impressed and it renewed my love of my regular doctor. That said, when I do get a BFP I'm switching over to a local OB/GYN or midwife as soon as possible because that drive is quite a long haul if you have to do it more than once or twice a year. 

I have to look into local midwives - I feel like it is a long waitlist to get in to see one here in Alberta but I should really try I suppose. I think they'll fit better with my medical philosophy than a regular doctor and are more likely to work well with my naturopath...

reneeannem

@catiecatp I'd heard there was such a long waiting list for a midwife in Toronto you'd have to sign up before getting pregnant but in the end if you're calling as soon as you know (I got my bfp at 10 dpo but called at about 15) it's usually OK here. Some take personal reasons into account, too. I think it's probably harder in Alberta given various political reasons but do try because they can be absolutely invaluable, especially since you're entering pregnany with natural trepidation.

catiecatp

@reneeannem - I'm in Calgary - so the demand is likely lower than Toronto, but the political climate (conservative) may mean that more people go the traditional route of medicine vs. midwifes and so there may be fewer overall. I'll make a note to ask my naturopath the next time I see her. Love my doctor but she doesn't know much about alternative medicine - but at least she isn't dismissive of it

cooaladoll

I thank my lucky stars and rave to whoever will listen every time I visit my GYN/OB. He's actually somewhat young, but I've never felt more cared for by any other doctor. He absolutely remembers everything we talk about from visit to visit and makes a special point of using contact (not the creepy kind of course, but like hugs and support from your dad) throughout every consultation. When I called the office to get the results of my HCG testing, the nurse called back pretty promptly and while not rude, she was just very matter of fact when she told me the news. He called me about an hour later tho (it took me a half minute to get my crying under control before I could pick up) and said he was so sorry that he hadn't been able to talk to me first and that he had been waiting until he had the time to discuss for a moment the situation and to make sure I was alright. I could tell he was genuinely concerned for me (I could almost feel his reassuring leg pat) and he wanted to encourage me to try again. A week later when his nurse called to give my final HCG result and recommendations, she was very sweet and when I told them I had stopped bleeding, again I heard and felt the true concern for my health and well being when she said how glad she was because it was one of their concerns with me. I just can't convey the enormity of how good it feels to have doctors that you actually feel have true concern for you! I strongly encourage anyone who doesn't to keep looking!

MPeplin

During the follow-up appointment two weeks after my miscarriage, the nurse who took my weight and blood pressure had the sensitivity to ask how I was feeling emotionally. How wonderful to be asked! She then said, "It doesn't matter how old the baby was. It's still a huge loss." I wanted to shout, "Finally! Someone who understands!" I felt she saw me as a whole person, not just another patient. 

I wrote a letter to her bosses expressing what an asset she is to the office. I encourage you ladies to do the same for the medical professionals who were good to you.

cooaladoll

Great idea @MPeplin!

beff12

It makes me happy to see that several ladies had such positive experiences with their OBs. Mine was so great and I think about how she handled my mc rather often. She stopped acting like a doctor for a few moments and physically wiped away my tears after my final u/s was completed. She talked to me like she was a friend and shared her own miscarriage experience with me, including how she had twins after!,  and encouraged me about the future.

She remained super encouraging at my checkup the next week. We tentatively set my next yearly exam for November 2016, but she said, "you'll be pregnant before then. I know it." A couple nurses asked how I was doing and said they were so sorry for what had happened. It really makes all the difference in the world to have a doctor that genuinely cares!