Intro

jsl82

Hi- I guess I should introduce myself.  I'm turning 34 in a few short weeks and have been married to a wonderfully supportive man since August.  We have had 2 pregnancies and both have ended in miscarriage.  Each time we found out at the NT scan at 12 weeks.  Our first pregnancy was in 2014.  We had a missed miscarriage at 8 weeks.  Our latest miscarriage was just before Christmas and this time the fetus measured at 10 weeks. I have had D&Cs with both miscarriages and genetic testing was done for both, but we were only able to get genetic information from this last pregnancy.  We found out that is was a genetically normal girl.  We were both surprised about the sex and I was sent on for more testing since she was genetically normal.  All of my results came back negative- so there is no medical reason for these miscarriages.  So now I'm faced with deciding if/when we are going to try again.  

To be honest I am not sure that I want to try again.  I mean there is no guarantee that we will ever have a successful pregnancy- and I don't see how I could ever get excited about being pregnant again. I was scared of miscarriage through out most of my last pregnancy (I cried when I got the BFP- and not the happy tears).  My husband really wants to try again- and he gets so sad whenever I say I don't want to try again.  I asked if we should go back on birth control over the weekend and he immediately said no. I wish I could be as sure about trying again as he is.  I feel so guilty about not wanting to try again and even though I do really want to have a family- I think if we try again it will be out of guilt and not hope.  

No one seems to understand what I'm going through- everyone just expects me to want to try to get pregnant again- so I figured this would be the best place for me to come and rant. 

kayham12

I get your feelings. I have had a successful pregnancy and only one MC and I'm having trouble trying to wrap my mind around the way I will feel when/if I get pregnant again. My DH wants to try again although he hasn't said exactly when, I think he is worried about pressuring me. I don't know when I will be ready. 

mrandmrssmith007

I am so sorry you are going through this.  I have been ttc for 3 years, have had 4 miscarriages and no take home baby. I have unexplained infertility and have had every test in the book....all normal.  I started seeing a reproductive endocrinologist(RE) after my third loss and I just did my 1st iui (unfortunately if was a bfn).  The only thing they have found is I am slightly hypothyroid and I have a thin uterine lining that never seems to get above 6mm.  This was concerning to my RE, that is why we started doing iui, the fertility injections help to thicken my lining.  I now get round 8-9mm.   My one piece of advice to you would be to start seeing a specialist now if you plan on trying again.  It is a hard and exhausting road, many times I have wanted to give up, but I know that if I were to look back on everything 5,10,20 years from now, I would regret it if I didn't try everything within my power to have a family.   Best of luck to you and if you ever have any questions feel free to contact me.