New To Board, TTC #1

Kaessi

Hi Guys! I’ve lurked for a bit now, and I think this is a group that I want to be a part of – you guys all seem very kind & encouraging!

I don’t know where to start, other than to be honest & state that I am terrified to begin the “infertility” journey! Just typing that word makes my heart beat faster!

I’ve always longed for kids. DH…not so much. We actually broke up for a bit when dating because of this. However, he did a full 180, and for almost three years now he has been coveting a family, almost more so than me. I’ve been on BC since I was 16, and got off when we got married, in 9/14. At first we were NTNP but about a year ago I began timing to the best of my ability with CM, and without charts, or OPKs or anything of that sort. When I went for my annual in July, my OBGYN said it was probably about time to start some testing, and that the first step would be to get an SA of my DH. Well…he balked at this. Wanted to just keep trying to time & see what happened. So we did, with no results. Finally, right after Christmas, he decided to go through with the SA. The nurse called me with the results a few days later and said, “Everything is low. Count, motility, everything.” When I asked for specifics she couldn’t tell me, just said “low is low” and he’ll need to see an RE.

We had a very difficult time making an appt with an RE as there are only a few options to choose from where we live. I made an appt with one, but have read horrible online reviews and just don't fee really comfortable. Have called several times to ask questions and was told someone would call me back and I'm still waiting. Quite frustrating! So DH called his PCP and was able to get a referral to a UR and I believe we are going to cancel the appt. with the RE. However, I did call my OBGYN back and ask if we could proceed with testing for me in the meantime. (I’m not sure why, I just feel that something may be off). The nurse said that they can’t do any type of testing on me at all until the issue with DH is resolved. Is this normal?

His appt is in two weeks, so until then…we wait. I’m trying OPK for the first time this month and it seems I don't know what I'm doing. I think I am past O, based on CM, but never got a positive.  This all overwhelms me! I’m not sure we’re doing the right thing and I really have no one to talk to about these things. Most of my friends are well into raising their kids currently & didn’t go through anything like this.

Sorry to be so long-winded on my first post – I apologize! But I do appreciate you guys allowing me to have this outlet. Look forward to “meeting” and chatting with y’all!

 

jennh75b

Welcome, Kaessi!  I can totally relate to so much of what you wrote.  We got married in 10/14 and started TTC in 9/14, just as you have.  None of my friends had any type of fertility issues and I didn't know all there was out there for women...or should I say couples... having problems TTC.  I've recently been referred to the RE, just waiting for my appointment in March.  This board has taught me a lot about what is out there!  

I'm glad your husband has finally come around to doing the SA.  I could see my husband doing the same thing if asked.  I hope you figure this all out.

I have no idea why they would not bother to test you while your husband is undergoing his side of things.  Makes no sense.  It would seem to me doing things simultaneously would be the best option and so anything that is possibly wrong could be corrected together, thus giving you more time.  But maybe someone who has already gone through these appointments would know more than I do.  

Best of luck to you!

rspalding001

Welcome and good luck!

I agree that it seems odd they would not test you at the same time as your husband. Id maybe try asking again? Sorry you are not having luck wit the RE, maybe your office thinks it would be better for the RE to do all the tests on you since they tend to do more than an OB would in general. That's the only thing I can think of. But there are basic blood tests your OB should be able to order for you to rule things out that do not necessarily require an RE. Id ask again if I were you. My OB was able to order the following for me which were all just blood work with the exception of the HSG. 

1. TIMED LABS: FSH and estradiol (checks for ovarian reserve)- to be done on day 3 of your cycle. Progesterone (checks for ovulation) - to be done on day 21 of your cycle or 7 days after you ovulate.
2. Untimed labs: TSH & LH which can effect fertility. Then antiphospholipid antibody panel and lupus anticoagulant.
3. Hysterosalpingogram (HSG) - mainly looks at patency of tubes but can sometimes see if there is scar tissue in the uterus.

Kaessi

Thank you! It sounds like we have a lot in common & it helps to know there are others going through a similar journey! I've been with the same OBGYN for years and am thinking perhaps it's time I change? He's a bit "old-school" and while I really like him & feel complete comfortable with him, I'm beginning to think someone else may be able to provide me with some different options. But then again, maybe not? Every decision in this process so far seems to be a struggle!

1inthehopper

Welcome and I hope you get some answers soon! 

PoeMasque

Welcome! Don't worry, I am a nurse and I was still completely oblivious to what was out there for people TTC. I also have quite a few friends who had no issues with conceiving (even after 35) and thought it would be the same for me. Now those friends are all announcing their 2nd pregnancies. This is a great board, it's supportive and a lot of the people here are extremely knowledgeable. I agree that you might want to either push your OB to start testing on you (anyone over 35 should be able to have testing done with no issue) or find someone else....maybe he just doesn't know what to do? 

MollySm

Welcome!  There's so much info here - I'm sure you'll get a better sense of things as you talk with others who have been in your place.  

Kaessi

I think I will wait until the appt. with the UR, to see if we gain any more insight, and then make a decision about switching OBs.

Thank you all for your support. Good luck to you all as well!

MntnGirl

Welcome! My OBGYN ordered a hormone panel, HSG, pelvic ultrasound, and SA all at the same time. Later, our RE did as well. 

Kaessi

Thanks @MntnGirl! I'm still trying to figure out why I wouldn't be tested as well, and my best guess is that  it has to do with insurance. Am hoping to find out more next week.

thistle8677

Welcome and best of luck to you!