TW: MMC
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
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Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
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BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
TTC After a Loss
ceclarlinetlo
member
Introduction - losses mentioned
ceclarlinetlo
member
Hi everyone,
I'm new to posting in the board. My husband and I have been ttc since October 2014. This is my timeline
October 2014 - first cycle ttc. I have irregular cycles so We jumped all in and began tracking my bbt, using OPKs and checking for ewcm.
Dec 24th: positive test on third cycle
Jan 26th: first ultrasound at 8 weeks reveals blighted ovum
Jan 27th: D&C
March 7th: first cycle post D&C - no OPKs and no bbt because I thought it would be less stressful and I was very wrong.
April 9th: resume OPK, bbt and cm tracking
June 12th: positive test in third cycle post D&C
July 2nd: first ultrasound reveals yolk sac and fetal pole still at 6w1d with no heartbeat. Took blood and beta level that day was 64,383
July 6th: beta only rose to 75000 after 96 hours, progesterone still over 20
July 10th: Miscarriage confirmed - told if I don't miscarry in two weeks to come back for an ultrasound to see how things are progressing in terms of detachment
July 24: ultrasound still showed fetal pole 6w1d but gestational sac at 9w6d with no detachment.
July 27th: D&C
I'm just at a loss for words and feelings. After my first loss I immediately knew I wanted to keep trying but this time I am more conflicted.
On the one hand I'm thankful that I can get pregnant and that my body holds onto pregnancy so well but I feel like this suggests that we just have crappy genetics (I'm looking into testing for things that cause recurrent miscarriage) and if that's true there is nothing we can do about that. We just have to endure loss after loss until we get a good egg/sperm. And I'm sorry but on top of the emotional and physical pain that comes with loss it is also just plain inconvient having to take time off work.
Also- ttc just takes so much emotional energy - and because I have irregular cycles (they range 28-42 days but my average is 31-33) I feel like I am damned if I do damned if I dont. For me, all the tracking makes life so compartmentalized into three stages. First you are waiting for the fertile week, then you wait to ovulate then you wait to get your period or test. Wash rinse repeat. It can absolutely suck the joy out of life.
I guess until I get my cycle back its a moot point but it's just constantly at the back of my kind.
If you made it this far thanks for reading.
I'm new to posting in the board. My husband and I have been ttc since October 2014. This is my timeline
October 2014 - first cycle ttc. I have irregular cycles so We jumped all in and began tracking my bbt, using OPKs and checking for ewcm.
Dec 24th: positive test on third cycle
Jan 26th: first ultrasound at 8 weeks reveals blighted ovum
Jan 27th: D&C
March 7th: first cycle post D&C - no OPKs and no bbt because I thought it would be less stressful and I was very wrong.
April 9th: resume OPK, bbt and cm tracking
June 12th: positive test in third cycle post D&C
July 2nd: first ultrasound reveals yolk sac and fetal pole still at 6w1d with no heartbeat. Took blood and beta level that day was 64,383
July 6th: beta only rose to 75000 after 96 hours, progesterone still over 20
July 10th: Miscarriage confirmed - told if I don't miscarry in two weeks to come back for an ultrasound to see how things are progressing in terms of detachment
July 24: ultrasound still showed fetal pole 6w1d but gestational sac at 9w6d with no detachment.
July 27th: D&C
I'm just at a loss for words and feelings. After my first loss I immediately knew I wanted to keep trying but this time I am more conflicted.
On the one hand I'm thankful that I can get pregnant and that my body holds onto pregnancy so well but I feel like this suggests that we just have crappy genetics (I'm looking into testing for things that cause recurrent miscarriage) and if that's true there is nothing we can do about that. We just have to endure loss after loss until we get a good egg/sperm. And I'm sorry but on top of the emotional and physical pain that comes with loss it is also just plain inconvient having to take time off work.
Also- ttc just takes so much emotional energy - and because I have irregular cycles (they range 28-42 days but my average is 31-33) I feel like I am damned if I do damned if I dont. For me, all the tracking makes life so compartmentalized into three stages. First you are waiting for the fertile week, then you wait to ovulate then you wait to get your period or test. Wash rinse repeat. It can absolutely suck the joy out of life.
I guess until I get my cycle back its a moot point but it's just constantly at the back of my kind.
If you made it this far thanks for reading.
Re: Introduction - losses mentioned
I'm so sorry you are experiencing the very thing that I'm afraid of.
Take care of yourself and take all the time you need.
BFP 2/19/15 • MMC found at 9 wks • D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
BFP 8/29/15 • CP (age 37)
TTC#2 since May 2017
BFP 10/18/17 • MMC found at 8 wks • Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
BFP 2/16/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 4/13/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 5/07/18 • MMC found at 10.5 wks • D&E at 11.5 wks • Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
BFP 9/24/18 • CP (age 40)