Picking Up Bad Habits from Other Kids

Baby54124

My little one who is turning two tomorrow, spends all day with her cousins who are extremely misbehaved. She has now started throwing temper tantrums that are the exact copy of her older cousin. I am thinking about looking for a daycare to get her to spend time around other children, but people keep saying that if I do that, she could pick up other bad habits from those other kids where we have no idea how those other kids are being raised. What would you suggest? How do I teach a two year old NOT to copy what she sees? I had to put her in time out the other day and that seemed to be effective for the certain circumstance. I just don't want to ALWAYS have to resort to time out. Any suggestions?

Perfect Sonnet

It sounds to me like you have a pretty normal two year old.  Most, if not all, two year olds will have temper tantrums.  I don't think being around other kids with "bad habits" has too much to do with it (they all have bad habits...they're children).  Toddlers are trying to figure the world out.  They need to be put in situations in which they will be frustrated, throw a fit, and be told no.  It is how we all learn that we don't always get what we want.  There are many ways to deal with tantrums from time out, to ignoring it, to removing her from a certain situation. 

 

Bigboobsmcgee

I also think you have a perfectly normal child. This is just one of the many reasons being a parent is so tough. YOU as the parent have to teach your child to be a good person. It's your job to discipline, guide and display the appropriate behaviors. Your child will be around "bad" kids her entire life. You can't hide her from the world.

I hate to say it but 3 is even tougher than 2 so I'd figure out a good plan now. We used time out for hitting only. I don't believe time out is effective for all negative behaviors because then toddlers would be in time out the majority of the day. They are tough so you have to redirect, ignore and teach her.

sunnymommyo2

My two year old was perfect at 22, 23 months but then he turned to the dark side...who is this angry little man? I ask myself. You just have to take a deep breath, re-explain why it's not ok and model the correct behavior when ya can...put a beer in the freezer when you start bedtime routine. If it doesn't take too long, cold beer...if it takes an hour (like my kid), slushy beer!

GRJC

My son has done that a couple times at daycare and then will bring the behaviors back home.  Drives me crazy.  It is what it is though.  So normal.  We just let him know it's not ok until he gets it and stops.

contourhands

Mines in daycare....it's rough because he gets away with whatever when he's down there and when he gets home it's a whole other story...Just discipline him/ her at home despite what they are learning from others...they will get it.  they are going to be around bad influences when they are older (regardless) so keep that strong foundation in the home.

Anne Mommy

My kids did that too. I try to identify the feeling (wow you seem really upset/frustrated/whatever, let's talk when you are calm). After the tantrum is over, we talk about what happened and offer practice. "It seems like you were upset when brother took your toy. Let's think of what we could do different.Maybe you could pick a different toy or wait until his turn is over." 

It's a pain, but it helps to teach them to identify feelings. 

SLGILL1978

Sounds like a typical two year old. You need to be consistent with the discipline. For us, time out is a last resort. I always start with "no", redirection, taking toy/object away (if applicable) and then time out. 

momofnand

This forum literally helped me from depression and deep sorrow. I am a working mother and I leave my baby with my in laws. He spends most of the time with his cousins who are also of same age. I don't know what all he picks up from them. To correct him I am not with him for majority of the day time. It's affecting my confidence and killing me with mom guilt when ever he behaves, actually imitates his cousins. I pray to God to give me strength.